Money Laundering Jokes
52 money laundering jokes and hilarious money laundering puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about money laundering that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Money Laundering Short Jokes
Short money laundering jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The money laundering humour may include short stealing money jokes also.
- My dad come up to my room, and handed me my soaking wet wallet, after accidentally leaving it in my jeans as they went through the wash. "Son, you're going to have to stop money laundering."
- A spy, an adulterer, and a guy who launders money for the Russian mob walk into a bar... The bartender says "What'll it be, Mr. President?"
- A lawyer, a spy, a money launderer, and a mob boss walk into a bar. The bar tender looks up and says, "you must be here to talk about adoption".
- My dad accidentally left cash in his pocket when he washed his pants in the washing machine He proud screamed throughout the house "Hey everyone I'm laundering money"
- Today I accidentally put my wallet in the washing machine I suppose I'm now a money launderer
- I accidentally left my wallet in my jeans when I put them in the washing machine. A few days later I got arrested for money laundering.
- I was arrested for washing my pants without taking the cash out of my pockets. They charged me for laundering money.
- did my laundry, and at the bottom of my basket were a couple of crumpled $1s As I smoothed them out for folding, my wife looked over at me, so I said "laundered money"
True story - I got arrested for asking around for advice on money laundering I don't get it.
During this COVID-19 pandemic, I thought the least I could do to stay safe was to disinfect my money. - My dad had the ultimate dad joke... When we were little, he'd tell us how we had to remember to take our wallets out of our jeans when we put in the washing machine.
Because that's laundering money.
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Money Laundering One Liners
Which money laundering one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with money laundering? I can suggest the ones about laundering and tax evasion.
- Money Laundering If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, it's Donald.
- A custodian stole some money. She was charged with money laundering.
- I like my clothes the way I like my money Laundered.
- Found out my son is laundering money His wallet is ruined
- How did Lex Luthor hide his money laundering from superman? He used a krypton-currency.
- What do you call a man who hides his cash in a washing machine? A money launderer.
- Britain's new £5 note is washable. Gives new meaning to the phrase "laundering money"
- Does money shrink when you wash it? No, but it does when you launder it!
- I did some money laundering Now it's all in the dryer.
- My wallet just went through the wash. I guess you could say I've been laundering money.
- What do you do if you get dirt on your momey? Got to a money launderers
- How do you launder money? Put it under the soap.
Amusing Money Laundering Jokes to Make You Laugh with Friends
What funny jokes about money laundering you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean robbing bank jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make money laundering pranks.
I was folding my pants, fresh out the drier, and found a dollar in a pocket. Jesus Christ...
How long have I been laundering money?
The blinds store
So there's this store down the street called "Bailey's Blinds", and I can't help but wonder that it must be a front for some sort of i**... activity. Money laundering, perhaps? Or maybe it's an incognito hub for illicit products of some nature. I mean, how can a business possibly function for over 15 years while consistently profitable, by selling nothing but blinds? ...It's a shady business if you ask me.
So the FBI, the DEA, and the Chicago police are looking for a bear ...
This bear has been up to no good - it's suspected of running a major m**... lab, money laundering, and even m**... for hire. The authorities think the bear is hiding in some woods near Chi-town.
The FBI go into the woods first. After a few hours, the agents come out. "No bear in there," they say. "He got away."
Then the DEA give it a try. They search the forest for 24 hours but find no suspects.
Finally, the Chicago police take over. Two CPD officers walk into the forest. Muffled cries can be heard amongst the trees. About an hour later they walk out with a rabbit in handcuffs.
"Alright! Alright! I'm a bear," says the rabbit.
I forgot to take my wallet out of my pants in the washer.
I have committed money laundering.
My wife threatened to call the cops if I didn't start checking the pockets of our clothes when I did laundry.
I asked "And what exactly do you expect them to charge me with?"
She said, "Money laundering."
The creator of CCleaner has been caught with charges of money laundering.
He claims he was just cleaning out his cache.
I forgot my tips from last night in my shorts...
Now I'm serving 12 years in jail for money laundering.
I was telling my wife that Paul Manafort spent over 900K on rugs using laundered money...
To which she replied, "Wow, I bet he only got like 4 rugs."
How did the clam launder money for the Trump family?
Through a shell company!
(waits quietly for MSNBC show)
No wonder the devil has so much wealth to temp people with...
He's been laundering money in an off-sheol account.
My dad commited a felony today
The federal agents showed up at more door to take him away. His wallet went through the wash and now he's going to do time for money laundering.
A cow got arrested...
What do you call it when a cow gets arrested for money laundering?
Moolaw
What happened to the man who hid his money in a washing machine?
He got arrested for money laundering
I left cash in my pocket when I put my pants in the washing machine
I was arrested for money laundering
I started laundering money...
I'm using a washing machine company as my front. The money looks extra clean.
I accidentally left a dollar in my pants pocket, and it went through the washer and dryer.
I hope the police don't find out about my money laundering scheme...
My dad always told me to always check my pants pockets before I put them in the washer, in case there was some money.
Because if you leave it there, you could be arrested for laundering money.
There once was a washing machine that loved washing stuff he found...
He would find ANYTHING on the ground, forcefully shove it inside him, clean it, and take it out. One day he found some money on the ground and did his usual routine before being apprehended by the FBI. He was arrested for Money Laundering.
I'm pretty sure my local corner shop is a money laundering front.
I've been in there about 1000 times and not once have I seen a corner for sale.
Last night, I forgot to take my wallet out of my pants
I could have been arrested for money laundering