momm Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious momm puns

Every "yo momma" joke has been done thousands of times, by thousands of different people.

Kinda like yo momma.


Yo momma is so fat ...

She took a jump in the pool, they found water on Mars.


Mommy, I saw you jumping on daddy's belly last night.

Yes, we were trying to get rid of daddy's big belly. I jump on him so all the air would come out.

Aha, I know why it isn't working then – the woman from next door comes every afternoon when you go shopping and blows all the air back into him again.


"Mommy, why does everyone at school pick on me?"

"I have no idea, Someoneyourownsize"


Yo momma, she so fat...

there's people on the internet who believe she's flat, not round.


Mommy! I found a $10 bill today, but I threw it away, cus it was fake.

"Oh, how did you know it was fake?"

"It had two zeroes instead of one."


Yo momma is so ugly...

Her dildo needs viagra


Mommy, could you please make me a sandwich?

Don't call me mommy just because I slept with your father!

So what am I supposed to call you?

Just call me Steve, like everybody else.


Mommy, why are some of your hairs turning grey?

A curious child asked his mother: Mommy, why are some of your hairs turning grey?

The mother tried to use this occasion to teach her child: It is because of you, dear. Every bad action of yours will turn one of my hairs grey!

The child replied innocently: Now I know why grandmother has only grey hairs on her head.


Your momma so slutty...

...her spirit animal is the swallow.


A mommy mole, daddy mole, and baby mole are together in their burrow

Mommy mole sticks her head out and sniffs the air. She asks, "What's that smell? Is it brown sugar?"

Daddy mole sticks his head out to sniff around, "No I don't think so. Smells like vanilla to me."

The baby mole still in the burrow says "I don't know what you guys are talking about. All I can smell is molasses!"


Yo momma so fat...

Yo momma so fat when she talks to herself its a long distance call.


What did the momma cow say to her baby cows?

It's pasture bedtime


Yo momma so fat, when she wants to take a bath...

She fills up the tub and THEN turns on the water.


"Mommy, why do I have black skin and you have white skin?"

"Honey, when I think back to that night, you're lucky you don't bark."


YO momma so nasty...

She pours salt water down her pants to keep the crabs fresh.


Your momma is so ugly....

Bill Cosby gave her coffee.


Your mommas so poor

I saw her walking down the street with one shoe. I said "hey you lost a shoe". She said "na I found one"


Mommy mommy I dont wanna see grandma!

Mom: Shut up and keep digging.


Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing.


Yo momma cooks so bad...

The flys all chipped in and fixed the screen door.
>we're here all night, don't forget to tip your waiter!!


Your momma so fat

It's been four weeks since Thanos snapped his fingers and she's still disintegrating.


Mommy takes little johnny to the zoo..

As they pass the elephant cage, the elephant has an erection.

"What's that, Mommy?" asks the child.

"Nothing, Johnny, nothing," says the embarrassed mother, swiftly leading him on.

A week later Johnny's dad takes him and the same happens. "What's that, Daddy?"

"That, son, is the elephant's penis."

"Mommy said it was nothing."

"Your mother's spoiled, Son!"


Yo Momma so fat (Avengers Edition)

Yo Momma so fat it took Thanos 2 Snaps to destroy her.


Mommy, why is daddy bald?

"Its because he thinks a lot sweetheart"

The kid stared at his mom for a minute and asked

"is that why you have a lot of hair?"


"Mommy, mommy! Can I lick the bowl?"

"No, flush it like everyone else"


Yo momma so fat

Not even dolby could surround her


Mommy or Daddy

As i walked into the jail cell the big burly man in the corner asked me, "Do you want to be the mommy or the daddy?"

I said, "I guess i'll be the daddy"

"Ok, now get over here and suck momma's dick."


"Mommy, I don't want to see grandma today!"

"Shut up and keep digging."


Yo momma so fat...

The dinosaurs went extinct when she forgot her parachute.


Yo momma

Yo mommas so ugly that even her dildo has to take Viagra


Yo momma so basic...

...she got a pH of 15.


Yo momma so ugly ..

Her portraits hang themselves


yo momma so ugly

her vibrator needs viagra


Yo momma is so unfamiliar with the gym...

...she calls it James


What are the most funny Momm jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Momm? Well, here are the best Momm dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Momm pick up lines to share with friends.

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