mobs Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious mobs puns

How many mobsters do you need to push a man off a cliff?

None. He slipped and fell by himself.

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A mobster discovers that his deaf accountant has cheated him out of 10 million bucks.

He confronts him, bringing along an interpreter. "Ask him where the money is," the mobster says.

The interpreter does so, and the accountant signs back, "What are you talking about?"

The interpreter tells the godfather, "He says he doesn't know what you're talking about."

The mobster puts a pistol to the accountant's head. "Ask him again!"

The interpreter signs, "He'll kill you if you don't tell him!"

"Okay, okay!" the accountant signs back. "The money is buried behind the shed in my cousin Enzo's backyard!"

"What'd he say?" asks the don.

"He says that you don't have the guts to pull the trigger."

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Why did the mobster shoot the clock?

So it wouldn't tock.

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What did the mobster call it when he couldn't move his dead friend's body?

Rigatoni!

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A mobster killed an Irishman with a porcelain doll

He was accused of knick-knack paddy whack

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A mobster comes home early to find a strange car in his driveway. NSFW

He sneaks into the house and up to his bedroom where he hears his wife having sex with another guy. Furiously he leaves without interrupting them and calls his best hitman over. He tells him "I'll give you $1000 to shoot her in the head and another $1000 to shoot him in the dick." The mobster waits across the street while the hitman goes into the house. One loud bang is heard and the hitman comes out. The mobster approaches him and said "I told you to shoot them both!"
"I did," replies the hitman.

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Where did the mobster go to college?

Whas-a-matta U.

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What does a mobster do when his house gets too cluttered?

He has a garrote sale.

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What does a mobster buried in cement eventually become?

A hardened criminal.

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How did the mobster burn his lips on a tailpipe?

He tried to blow up a police car.

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What does a mobster and an exorcist have in common?

..Beats the hell out of me!

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A group of mobs said a maxim during a bank robbery

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Where do mobs get high in Minecraft?

In the Nether land.

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What did the mobster use for his gamertag?

Al Capwned

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Why didn't the mobsters car parts fit?

...they all fell off a truck.

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Who's the only mobster in Middle Earth?

James Gandalf-ini.

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What's a mobster porn actress called?

Sunny Corleone!

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What are the most funny Mobs jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Mobs? Well, here are the best Mobs dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Mobs pick up lines to share with friends.

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