Mobile Jokes
133 mobile jokes and hilarious mobile puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mobile that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Make your friends laugh out loud with this ultimate collection of mobile phone jokes. From funny mobile home jokes to jokes about mobile legends and mobile apps, our collection has it all. Download your favorite mobile phone jokes today in gigabytes for your Kindle.
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Funniest Mobile Short Jokes
Short mobile jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mobile humour may include short phone jokes also.
- I went to a restaurant. It was full; no place to sit...
I took out my mobile,
Placed it to my ear and said loudly- "Bro come fast, she's here with someone else...
Six couples ran away - I saw on the news that the CEOs of T-mobile and Sprint got married last weekend. Great wedding, terrible reception.
- So I installed this new mobile game where you go around and try to catch everything... It's called Grindr
- What do a tornado and a tennessee divorce have in common? Someone's going to lose a mobile home
- I've ordered some German food through a mobile app. The sauerkraut has arrived but the wurst is yet to come.
- My grandfather told me that teenagers have become so lazy because of technology. "They're not the only ones," I said, looking at his mobility scooter.
- Billy! What have you done?! I spent 1,500 $ on a pc to only play PUBG Mobile.
*Aim for Billy's head. - I was wondering if anyone would be willing to support a petition to modernize the name of the Pope Mobile. I think we should call it the Miracle Whip. It's got more of a tangy zip to it.
- Christmas time. Yesterday i saw a man giving money and mobile to person having only knife. People are so nice during christmas time.
- Husband : Please Call An Ambulance I Think Am Having A Heart Attack... Wife : (Took His Mobile Phone) Quickly, Give Me The Password... Husband : Ooh I Think Am Fine Now...
Share These Mobile Jokes With Friends
Mobile One Liners
Which mobile one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mobile? I can suggest the ones about telephone and android.
- The price of oil has dropped so far that... Exxon-Mobil had to lay off 25 Congressmen.
- What do you drive in the fall? An Autumn-mobile.
I came up with this when I was six :) - Size of matter in descending order. Molecule > Atom > Proton > Quark > x on a mobile ad
- What kind of car runs on leaves? An autumn-mobile!
- Why is religion like mobile gaming? Free-to-pray, pray-to-win.
- What does the Jewish Bruce Wayne drive? The Shabbat-Mobile.
- I've deleted all my German friends from my mobile phone. It's now Hans-free.
- Did you hear about when Sting got a new mobile phone? He sent out an SMS to the world.
- What do you call a cellphone company that uses nuclear power? Cher-Mobile
- Nintendo is releasing a micro transaction mobile platformer Pay Per Mario
- Why does Mr Potato Head have a mobile? In case Mr Onion Rings
- If the punchline was in the title. Mobile users would be much happier.
- I tried explaining to my son how his mobile works But it just went over his head
- They just invented a mobile computing device that also plays guitar The "Eric Claptop"
- If I'm carrying around a USB stick Do I have mobile data?
T Mobile Jokes
Here is a list of funny t mobile jokes and even better t mobile puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Earliest-known Ten Commandments tablet sells at auction for $850000 Bumping Apple off the top spot for most expensive mobile device without a headphone jack.
- The Pope-mobile Because nothing says "faith in God" more than 4 inches of bullet-proof glass...
- I was sitting in the courtroom the other day and my phone started to die. Luckily I brought my mobile power bank. Anyways, I was charged with battery.
- I don't waste my money on mobile games, microtransactions, cosmetic game skins and so on... I save my money for more important things in life, like donating to my future wife on Twitch.
- My buddy and I have a picture of the Islamic God on the smart card inside our mobile phones. We're very SIM Allah.
- What does mobilization have common in Russia and Israel?
Long lines for flights to Tel Aviv. - I bought a german mobile phone yesterday. I turned it on airplane mode and it locked me out then crashed
- What do you call the security guards working outside a Samsung mobile store? Guardians of the Galaxy
- Why does the queen have much more mobility than the king in chess? Because the board looks like a kitchen floor.
- What do you call security guards working outside Samsung mobile shops or showrooms ? Guardians of the Galaxy.
Mobile Phone Jokes
Here is a list of funny mobile phone jokes and even better mobile phone puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do mobile phones have but also lack? Cells
- Testing new mobile phone Hello, i don't know if anyone is going to read this because i am using the internet explorer. But still i wanna wish you a good start in the new year 2010.
- Every mobile phone user has complained like this:
Don't text me while I'm in the middle of texting you, because now I have to change the whole text. - I drove my car into a river and watched it turn into a mobile phone... One minute, a Kia.
Next minute, Nokia. - Day 12 without my phone (on mobile, sorry for formatting issues)
I lost my phone 12 days ago and don't know where it is, please help. - How do cell phones get around? They are mobile.
- Where did Bane buy his mobile contract? Phones... for you.
- Orange Signal Booster Network Service has a mobile phone signal booster that is specifically designed to improve the Orange Network signal.
- Mobile users: set your phone on the top of your head right now.
- What's a sloth's favourite mobile phone? Any iPhone before the iPhone 8/iPhone X.
Mobile Home Jokes
Here is a list of funny mobile home jokes and even better mobile home puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do a hurricane in North Florida, a tornado in Oklahoma, and a divorce in East Texas have in common? Someone's going to lose a mobile home
- They're having a huge sale at the mobile home dealership. The prices are pre-fabulous
- Did you hear about the mobile home ductwork? They say it was double-wide
- Did you hear about the small portion of society that decided they were going to live in mobile underwater homes I think they call themselves a "sub" culture.
- What do you call a mobile homes for rabbits?
Wheelburrows. - Darling, why do you want a home phone?!? \- To search for my mobile!
Mobile Work Jokes
Here is a list of funny mobile work jokes and even better mobile work puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I tried to send my friend a text message about how my mobile carrier's reception deeply frustrates me, but it didn't work. I resent it.
- what do you call a mexican working on the side of the road? Mobil Juan
- Which company does the former wheelchair-bound nun work for? ...v**... Mobile
Comical & Quirky Mobile Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What funny jokes about mobile you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean cell phone jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mobile pranks.
My collection of meta knock knock jokes (on mobile so bad formatting)
Knock knock|who's there|hallucinations| hallucinations who? | (Walk away)
|||knock knock|who's there|sudden anxiety attack|sudden anxiety attack who?|Sorry am I talking too much?
||| Knock knock|Who's there|Your inability to focus|your inability to focus who|(mouth the words your inability to focus making me quiet but don't actually say it)
Princess Diana Jokes
What's the difference between Princess Diana and a blade of grass? About six feet.
How is Princess Diana like a mobile phone? Both die in tunnels.
Where does Diana stay when she visits Paris? Any place she can c**....
How is Princess Diana like breaking a bone? Both need a doctor to remove the plaster of paris.
What's the difference between Princess Diana and thirty-nine pennies? It's easier to scrape together thirty-nine pennies.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road? Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt.
What's the difference between Princess Diana an Casper the ghost? Casper can go through walls, Diana can't.
What's the difference between a Mercedes and Princess Diana? A Mercedes will easily reach 40.
What would Di be doing if she were alive today? Scratching at the lid of her coffin.
Yes I am a horrible person wow.
What do you call a nun on a bicycle?
v**... mobile
Wrong way
Anna was worried about her husband: he was not home yet from his trip to Birmingham. She phoned him on his mobile, "Where are you, dear?"
"I'm on the M1," he replied.
"I was so worried about you," she said. "The radio reported that some fool was driving along the M1 the wrong way."
"Just one??" he retorted, "There are hundreds of them!!"
What do you call a bus on its way to Comic Con?
v**... Mobile
Who says men don't remember?
A couple were Christmas shopping. The shopping center was packed , and as the wife walked through one of the malls she was surprised when she looked around to find that her husband was nowhere to be seen. She was quite upset because they had a lot to do and so she became so worried that she called him on her mobile phone to ask him where he was.
In a quiet voice he said, "Do you remember the jewelers we went into about five years ago where you fell in love with that diamond necklace that we couldn't afford, and I told you that I would get it for you one day?"
The wife choked up and started to cry and said, "Yes, I do remember that shop."
He replied, "Well, I'm in the pub next door."
I've just been arrested by police investigating match fixing.
They executed search warrants at my home and office, seized my computer, laptop and mobile phone, and froze my bank account.
All I did was go into my local bookies and put a £5 bet on Manchester United to win.
Emergency Services
An Emergency Call Centre worker in London has been fired, much to the dismay of her colleagues who are reportedly unhappy with
her dismissal.
It seems a male caller dialed 999 from a mobile phone stating: "I am depressed and lying here on a railway track. I am waiting for the train to come so I can finally meet Allah."
Apparently, "Keep calm and stay on the line," was not considered to be an appropriate response.....
I was just at a cell phone convention and stopped at the v**... Mobile booth.
It was just a bunch of nuns in wheelchairs.
What do you call a nun in a wheelchair
v**... Mobile
Why did no one want to play the mobile game about transexual dwarfs?
Because it had micro trans actions
So i asked this girl to have phone s**... with me..
She said she cant, because she has v**... Mobile..
An Emergency Call Centre operator has been fired...
An Emergency Call Centre operator has been fired in Bradford
It seems that a caller dialed 999 from a mobile phone stating, "I am depressed and lying on a railway line so that when the train comes I can finally meet my maker."
To which the call centre employee replied, "Remain calm and stay on the line."
I met a local girl when I was in Shanghai, I asked her if she could e**... me
for a city tour and asked for her mobile number, so I could call her.
She got excited and said: "s**... s**... s**..., wan free s**... for tonight"
Wow, I'm guessing this is how Chinese women express their hospitality!
But then, My friend interpreted for me & told me what she really said : 666136429.
What cell carrier do Mormons use?
v**... Mobile
The phone bill was exceptionally high. Man called a family meeting to discuss ....
Dad: This is unacceptable. I don't use home phone, I use my work phone.
Mum: Me too. I hardly use home phone. I use my companies phone
Son: I use my office mobile, I never use the home phone.
All of them shocked and together looked at the maid who's patiently listening to them.
Maid: "What? So we all use our work phones. What's the Big deal??
😂😆
An elderly man was driving his car down the motorway..
An elderly man was driving his car down the motorway when his mobile phone rang.
Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "George, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on the M40. Please be careful!"
"It's not just one car," said George. "It's hundreds of them!"
Living life on the edge.
My idea of living life on the edge is to leave the house on 18% mobile battery.
What do you call a disabled nun?
v**... mobile
What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
v**... Mobile
I didn't make up this joke but I find this one really funny!
What do you call a nun in a car?
v**... Mobile
The iPhone doesn't have a headphone jack and the Samsung battery is exploding...
It's like the mobile equivalent of our presidential election!
All about a Girl and you...!
If girl is with you - Restaurant Bill
If girl is far from you - Mobile bill
If girl is separated from you - Than Bar Bill.
Moral - No Girl - No Bills!
Husband: Call ambulance, Fast!
Husband: Call ambulance, Fast!
I am Having a Heart Attack...
Wife: ( Took his mobile): "Quick!! Tell me the Password!!"
Husband: It's Okay, I am feeling better now!! :D :D
The world's largest info tech company has merged with a mobile accessories company, but refuses to share a name with them. And they're not even sorry about it.
Nope, they're not Apple-Logitech.
Funny Fact
Always happens to me :
Study for one hour no one sees .
But pick up mobile just for a second and MOM/DAD enters the room
What do you call a nun on an iPhone?
v**... Mobile
People who play the piano are pianists
People who do science are scientists
People who race cars are racists
Sorry for the formatting on mobile
What do you call a flying nun?
v**... mobile
ISIS mobile shopping app
Everything is 90% off but you can only purchase while you're driving.
What do you call a wheelchair-bound nun who lives high up on a mountain?
A) High roller
B) v**... mobile
C) Nun of the above
What did the American mobile tower on the coast say about the foreign cruise liner?
I will not sync with this ship.
John: My friend Charlie has stolen my girlfriend's number from my mobile 2 days ago.
Harry: What happened then?
John: Charlie Has been sending romantic texts to his own sister since last 2 days.
What is a priest's cell phone provider?
v**... mobile
A mobile software developer just got fired from his job
He wasn't very appy.
Race for mobile phone.
Person 1 : Hey nice mobile phone. How much you bought it for?
Person 2: I won it in a race.
Person 1: Race? What kind of race? How many people were running?
Person 2: Well, the mobile shop owner, 3 cops and I.
Two hunters are in a forest.
One of them collapses, his eyes are rolled back and he doesn't appear to be breathing.
The other one whips out his mobile phone and calls the emergency services.
"I think my friend is dead", he says.
The operator responds in a cool, soothing voice. "Okay, stay calm. The first thing you need to do is make sure he's dead."
The hunter goes off the line before a loud BANG was heard.
"Okay, what next?"
My cousins name is Justin Case
To avoid any misunderstanding, I'll save him on my mobile properly, just in case...
Life is like a mobile game.
It's free but there's tons of microtransactions.
The lady who had crashed her SUV complained to the Police that the man she collided with was on his mobile and drinking beer from a bottle at the time.
The Police said that the gentleman was entitled to do what ever he wanted in his own garden!
Recent mobile phone technology has linked up with micro chip brain implant technology so that when your phone rings it can immediately connect without making a ringing sound.
It just won the Nobel peace prize.
How to communicate with God
A poster is found in all French churches. The translation is:
"By entering this church it may be possible that you hear "the call of God". However, it is less probable that He will call you on your mobile. Thank you for turning off your phones. If you want to talk to God, enter, choose a quiet place and talk to him. If you want to see him, send him a text while driving."
What's the most common type of owl in Great Britain?
Teatowel.
Sorry if you've heard or seen this before on here; I've not and I'm unable to search because I'm using the mobile sitem
What do you call a nun driving a taxi ?
v**... mobile
I rewrote Hansel & Gretel but changed the oven to a mobile stove.
The title is now Hansel & Griddle.
My wife crashed our car this morning.
When the police came she said the guy involved was on his mobile and eating a pie at the time.
The police advised her the guy was entitled to do what he wanted in his own living room.
My car is like my phone plan.
v**... Mobile.
What is the favorite mobile game of an african?
Where's my water
What do you call a Fortnite player in a car?
v**... Mobile
Jay-Z is Unable to Locate His Mobile Phone.
He says "Beyonce, have you seen my phone anywhere?"
She says "Did you try call it?"
He says "Yeah but it's on silent."
She says "If you like it then you should have put a ring on it."
My girlfriend thinks I treat our relationship like a game
Unfortunately that cost her 37 points
(Disclaimer: this isn't my original joke, it's from some mobile game I used to play)
A car thief gets brought before the judge
Judge: Why did you steel the car?
Thief: I had to get to work.
Judge: And why didn't you take the bus instead?
Thief: I've got no licence for driving a bus.
I asked my son if I could have the phone book. He laughed, shook his head: "You're so last century!", and handed me his mobile.
Long story short: the spider is now dead, son's phone is smashed and son is distraught.
I met a happy gay couple while passing through Mobile, AL
I asked if it was hard being gay here because I heard these jokes about how backwards Alabama is. They laughed and said it was a fair question, but all of their friends were really cool with it. I thought this was great news, so I asked how their families felt about it. I was shocked when they said everyone but their sister was also really supportive.
p**... was at the airport and was stopped by customs.
Customs: What have you got in those two sacks on your shoulders.?
p**...: Oh just a lot of mobile phones.
Customs: So why so many mobile phones.?
p**...: Well on my travels I had a call from my mate m**...,
He told me that he was starting up a Jazz Band, and could
I bring him back two Saxophones.
What do you call a walking nun?
v**... mobile
The phone bill was exceptionally high...
.... so the husband called a family meeting to discuss the issue.
Dad: This is unacceptable. I don't use the home phone, I use my work phone.
Mum: Me too. I hardly use our home phone. I use my company's phone.
Son: I always use my office mobile, I never touch the home phone.
All of them were shocked and together looked at the maid who was patiently listening to them.
Finally the maid said, "Why are you all looking at me? So we all use our work phones. What's the big deal??
I saw a woman using her mobile phone while I was driving next to her.
I was so p**... off with the irresponsible b**....
I threw my bottle of whiskey at her.
what do you call a redditor in a wheelchair?
v**... mobile.
