Moan Jokes

Following is our collection of sex puns and sows one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Moan jokes for adults, dirty scream jokes and clean pleasure dad gags for kids.

The Best Moan Puns

During a funeral...

The pallbearers accidentally bump into a wall and hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find out that the woman is actually alive.
She lives for 10 more years and then dies. There is another funeral for her. At the end of the service, the pallbearers carry out the casket.
As they are walking out, the husband cries out, "Watch out for the wall!"

Why did Helen Keller mastutbate with one hand?

So she could moan with the other.

Vegan girls never moan during sex

Because they don't want to admit that a piece of meat gave them such pleasure.

A funeral rerun . . .

A funeral service is held for a woman who just passed away. As the pallbearers carry the casket out, they accidentally bump into a wall.

They hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive.

She lives for 10 more years and then dies. They have another funeral for her. At the end of the service, the pallbearers carry out the casket.

As they are walking, the husband cries out, "Watch out for the wall!"

Having a cat is just like having a girlfriend ...

They both

* wail and moan when you neglect to feed them
* bite and scratch when you try to pet them
* keep escaping from the basement

why will you never hear a vegan moan in bed ?

she'll never admit she's enjoying a piece of meat...

How are women and tornadoes alike?

They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave.

I was playing a board game with my friends when I noticed some important pieces of the game were missing.

I asked my friend, " Are you the game owner?"

He said, "I moan but I'm straight"

[NSFW] Why don't vegetarian girls moan during sex?

Because they don't like to admit that a piece of meat can give them so much pleasure.

What does a vegan zombie moan?


Why don't vegans/vegetarians moan during sex?

They don't wanna show that they're loving the meat inside them

Whats tiny and makes priests moan?

Church attendance levels.

A lot of mathematicians walk into a bar

The first one says "I'll have a pint."

The second says "I'll have half a pint."

Bartender replies "We don't serve half pints."

All the remaining mathematicians moan "Way to ruin the joke!"

Moana decides she wants to visit Maui.

Maui, being a super nice guy, prepares a large feast for her arrival, with plans to treat her like a queen. Moana arrives and sees the massive feast, and she says to Maui, "You've done too much for me. I cannot accept these lavish gifts. Why did you do this?"

Maui responds, "What can I say? Accept your welcome!"

What's long, hard and makes a woman moan when erect?

An ironing board.

How is a woman different from refrigerator?

A refrigerator does not moan when you stick your meat in it.

Screaming ladies !

How do you make hundreds of old ladies scream and moan together?

Have another old lady shout "bingo"

A man writes a paper

A man hands his wife the paper and asks her to read it. She reads it for five minutes, quietly. Then suddenly she lets out an extremely sexual moan. She then hands the paper to her husband and says it was awful.

He responds how did you come to that conclusion?!?

I'd like to apologize if this isn't original but I came up with it yesterday so I'm gonna say it's original content

You know it's good when moan and your legs won't stop shaking.

Stretching, that is. You can do it anytime of the day and it still feels good.

Did you hear about the alien that works as a phone sex operator?

ET phone moan

-Hey, does your wife moan when having sex?

-Quite loudly actually, I can hear her from the living room!

"I'm so wet, Give it to me" She said

I said that she can scream and moan all she wants, but I will never give my umbrella

I moan every time a cashier checks an item for me

The sound is proportional to the amount. I once bought a house. They heard me three states away

When I have gay sex it's like a drum set

Clap them cheeks like cymbals
Make him moan like a base drum

[Harry Potter] What did Tom Riddle say to Myrtle before killing her ?

Hey, do you want to see my huge snake that i have kept hidden ? Its sure to make you "moan".

Why did the miner moan when he struck gold?

He was having an ore-gasm.

Have you ever heard a deaf woman moan in pleasure?

It sounds like pizza day in a special needs class.

People used to laugh when I told them I was a comedian...

So I started telling people I was a hooker. Now they just moan.

There is an abundance of tug jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 28 funniest jokes and moan puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any complain witze you can hear about moan.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

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