Missouri Jokes
53 missouri jokes and hilarious missouri puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about missouri that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Ready for a laugh? Check out this collection of hilarious jokes about Missouri! From the weather and football to the state, Missouri Compromise, Branson and Uranus, there's something for everyone. Plus, compare the sides of Arkansas and Massachusetts to California's to get a good chuckle!
Funniest Missouri Short Jokes
Short missouri jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The missouri humour may include short missouri state jokes also.
- Why does Missouri share borders with the most amount of States? Because Missouri loves company
- If Mississippi gave Missouri her New Jersey to wear at the fair, what will Delaware? I don't know but Alaska.
- I have a friend who really hates living in Central USA. She says she's in a constant state of Missouri.
- I started taking fish out of Kansas City and bringing them into Kansas. The local vegans and fishermen got mad at me. I said, What, I'm just putting them out of their Missouri
- Interviewer: Where were you born? Me: Missouri.
I: What state are you in now?
M: Apathy.
I: That's not what I meant.
M: I don't care. - A recent study shows that the best place for corporations to do business in the US is St. Louis. As they say, ..Missouri loves companies.
- Why were Missouri and Maine admitted as states at the same time? Because Missouri loves company.
- My companies biggest customer is the state of Missouri. I guess it's safe to say Missouri loves my company.
- TIL that in the 1820 Missouri Compromise, Missouri wasn't able to become a state unless Maine was also granted statehood. As it turns out, Missouri loves company.
- What do you call the new policing strategy of communities such as Ferguson, Missouri? A shot in the dark.
Share These Missouri Jokes With Friends
Missouri One Liners
Which missouri one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with missouri? I can suggest the ones about state and pioneer.
- Did you know only one US president has been born in Missouri? It's true, man.
- what's the most depressing place to live in America? Missouri
- Missouri's new travel slogan. Missouri Loves Company
- Why is the 24th State so depressed? It's a constant state of Missouri
- If Mississippi went to Missouri for a New Jersey what did Delaware ? Don't know, Alaska
- I live in a state of constant agony. That state is Missouri.
- What do you have if you get 14 women from Missouri in a room? A full set of teeth.
- Since I moved to Jefferson city I'm in state of Missouri ):
- Why do so many sad people go to Jefferson City? Because Missouri loves company.
- What did the US say when it was sad? I'm in Missouri.
- You know what I felt coming to the States? Missouri
- What do you call a sad state? Missouri
- What did the depressed teen say in the Midwest? Please end my Missouri
- What is the least pleasant state to live in? Missouri.
- What is Kathy Bates favorite state? Missouri
Missouri State Jokes
Here is a list of funny missouri state jokes and even better missouri state puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why is Missouri more economically successful than other states? Because Missouri loves companies
- Which of the States of America should be in Canada? Missouri
Ridiculous Missouri Jokes to Spark Fun and Laughter
What funny jokes about missouri you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean pickle jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make missouri pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Continuing the apparent theme of i**... jokes...
How do you circumcise a boy from Missouri?
You kick his sister in the chin.
I heard Missouri is having some great Black Friday sales this year...
100% off everything.
I was watching a documentary on the Ferguson, Missouri riots...
... and half way in I realized I was watching Rise of the Planet of the Apes.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many Missouri cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
Doesn't matter, they just sit in the blackness and shoot at it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Imperial Wizard of the k**... was just found dead near a river in Missouri...
Man, the moment the EPA gets threatened people start dropping w**... in our water.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why are people in St. Louis always sad?
They live in a constant state of Missouri.
Why did Missouri decided to also name their side of the river "Kansas City"?
Because Missouri loves company.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If Missouri and Oregon became one state....
It'd be known as the show me your b**... state.
My friend Billy Bob and I visited a place where you can stand in three states at once: Oklahoma, Kansas, and Missouri. Billy Bob opened up and said that he was actually in a fourth state; crippling depression. I said, I'm so sorry
... but you can't count Missouri twice.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A blonde says "Not all blondes are s**..., and I can prove it!"
"...Give me any state, and I'll tell you it's capital."
A person yells out, "Missouri!"
"M" replies the blonde.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Here in missouri.
We call it the midwest, but looking at a map you'll notice that it's more east than west. It made me wonder why we call it the Midwest, but then I realized that we are mostly a red state, and I can't imagine those folks wanting to call it the m**....
The Missouri state legislature is considering a ban on female legislators' clothing that leaves their arms exposed
I never thought I'd see a Republican state trying to overturn the right to bare arms
(Yes, this is actually happening)
