Mint Jokes
120 mint jokes and hilarious mint puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mint that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Enjoy an after-dinner mint with a side of laughter. From polo mints to thin mints and all the way to mint juleps, these funny mint jokes are the perfect way to make all your minty dreams come true. Looking to bring a few cents of humor to the table? Look no further!
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Funniest Mint Short Jokes
Short mint jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mint humour may include short mitt jokes also.
- I recently came into a HUGE amount of money. Unfortunately, though, I'm barred from future tours of the Mint.
- I was thinking of getting a job at the U.S. Mint Can you imagine the amount of money I would make?
- I have a shirt with 120 tiny pockets that fit exactly one mint each.... It's my Tic Tactical vest.
- Did you hear about the new minting machine that produces coins only if you focus intently on it? It makes cents if you think about it.
- I had a dream about a breath freshener left on my pillow. I ate it and it tasted like a fig. Then I woke up. Guess it was just a fig mint of my imagination.
- I make more money than Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerburg combined And all I do is work at the U.S. Mint
- What you call toes that taste like mint? Tic-tac-toe!
My 8 year old daughter made this one up. - So I was shopping online for antique guns..... and I got to the World War II section. I selected guns of French origin. They were all in mint condition.
- Without anyone's help, I created mints that each weigh 1/16 of a pound... I make my own announcemints now.
- Food scientists have finally managed to remove the mint flavor from gum The ex-spearmint was a complete success
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Mint One Liners
Which mint one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mint? I can suggest the ones about mini and mast.
- The U.S mint stopped making pennies. I don't know why, it doesn't make any cents.
- I know a guy who collects candy canes... ...they are all in mint condition.
- What are Karen's favorite candy? Entitle-mints
- Help! I accidentally swallowed a mint! Never mind, I'm cool now.
- How do Hogwarts students keep their breathe fresh? enchant mints
- Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. My coworker makes pennies.
We work at a mint. - What do you give an apprehensive person with bad breath? An encourage mint.
- How can you tell if a coin is fresh? You can still smell the mint
- Why did Jesus go to a Candy shop? To Test a Mint
- I'm selling my parachute. Mint condition. Never opened, only used once
- Why did the man decide to work at the coin mint? It made cents
- What is an old person's favorite flavor of gum? Retire-Mint
^Thank ^you, ^goodnight - What do you call someone with mints on their feet? Tic tac toes
- What's the most logical building in the USA? The US Mint.. it makes a lot of cents.
- I want some gum Got any spare-mint?
Breath Mint Jokes
Here is a list of funny breath mint jokes and even better breath mint puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I once amputated a man's toe and replaced it with a prosthetic made from a breath mint. I gave him a Tic Tac toe.
- What kind of breath mints do dyslexic military officers use? Tac-tics
- What do houses eat when their breath stinks? Apart Mints
- My boy asked me how to get a kiss on the first date. I told him to plan ahead and get some breath mints. Tac Tics my son, Tac Tics
- What would you call a store that sold only mints and gum? Bad Breath and Beyond.
- What do you call two breath mints that were turned into humans by a scientist? Ex-pair-a-mints.
- What do you call sugar-free breath mints from California? "Sacramentos."
- I had to break up with my girlfriend because she had bad breathe... ... I guess it just wasn't mint to be.
- Jesus never had bad breath. At-one-mint
- Did you hear about the guy who overdosed on breath mints? He had to be admitted to the Mentos hospital.
Canadian Mint Jokes
Here is a list of funny canadian mint jokes and even better canadian mint puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I just don't understand Canadian mints... They don't make any cents...
- "Why do you always exchange your Canadian dollars to USD? It makes no sense!" "Well neither does the Canadian Mint!"
- What makes no sense? The Canadian Mint
Polo Mint Jokes
Here is a list of funny polo mint jokes and even better polo mint puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Wanted: A pack of Polo's, Unopened. In Mint condition
Thin Mint Jokes
Here is a list of funny thin mint jokes and even better thin mint puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Sure, skinny jeans make you look skinny... Just like thin mints make you look thin.
- What is better than Thin Mints? Thicc Mints
(Please forgive me)
Hilarious Mint Jokes that Bring Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about mint you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean pine jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mint pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What kind of mint is the hardest to s**...?
Abandonment.
Three Guys Are Getting Ready For Their Dates
The first guy pops a breath mint for his date so his breath smells good. Then the second guy starts chewing some gum so his breath smells good. Then the last guy starts eating onions and garlic. The others say "Don't you want to have nice smelling breath for your date?"
"Nah" he says, "The lips I'm kissing tonight already stink."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A new mint flavored contraceptive taken before s**......
called Predickamints.
A mint worker walks into a bar...
the next morning he heads home to his wife with 2 fresh new black eyes,
shes asks "Did the bartender ask you what you do for a living?"
the mint workers says "well, I do make money after all"
Did you know that the guy who invented Tic Tacs never had to work another day in his life?
He made a mint.
People tell me I'm confusing...
I tell them I stopped making sense when I lost my job at the mint.
What do comic book collectors use in their hair?
Mint conditioner.
Why did the Hydroxyl molecule blow up the US Mint?
It was a Free Radical.
For Sale: 2-in-1 Menthol Shampoo
Great hairwash. Mint condition.
So I got a new job, and at the interview they told me I would be making millions...
I'll be working at the U.S. Mint.
My dad found an Altoid tin in his attic and told me it was worth over $400.
He said it was worth so much because it was in mint condition.
Why are mints so smart?
Because mints make cents.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
When Forrest Gump was a bartender
Someone ordered a mojito.
There he goes, puts som mint in, lime juice and he starts pouring some v**....
And the other bartender: r**..., FORREST, r**...!!!
The Engineer's Trainee
So one day at a coin mint, an engineer who works there is taking a trainee for a tour and shows him how everything works. They approach the dollar-making machine. After explaining it, the Engineer says:
"Well, what do you think? Complicated?"
And the Trainee says:
"No, I completely understand it; it makes sense."
To which the Engineer replies:
"No, it makes dollars."
Why did a lightbulb in the candy store go out?
It needed to get it's fill o' mint.
The penny making machine at the US mint stopped working the other day....
The director of the mint himself came to the machines engineer to ask him what the problem was.
"I can't figure it out!" exclaimed the puzzled engineer. "It doesn't make cents!!"
(Best told in person)
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do Zombies get rid of Bad Breath?
They Munch on some Flesh Mint!
It's so easy to understand people who work at the US mint
They make a lot of cents.
What does Altoid mean?
I've always wondered what that word mint
Someone's going to invent a snack that I can eat in bed as I'm going to sleep.
And they're going to make a mint.
Where's the best place to work if you want to make a lot of money?
The mint.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man was fired from the mint for m**... near the coins.
He said it wasn't fair; there was no common sense.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Ben and j**...'s is coming out with a new flavor with peach and mint.
It's called "Impeachmint"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call mentholated birth control?
A c**... mint.
Imagine what a fig-flavored mint would taste like.
Got it? Good.
That's a fig-mint of your imagination.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My Dad was killed at an e**... at the US Mint.
He was nickel-and-dimed to death.
Did you hear about the guy who invented the tic tac?
He made a mint!
I'll take my stuff and leave with my dad jokes.
I asked my friend why he always has coins laying around
He said told me he works at a mint, I said to him "that makes cents".
So my wife said there's a ton of ISO's on Facebook for girl guide cookies.
I said we should post it at a boosted price because they are mint in box.
Imagine having a money printer
That would be mint.
A friend of mine just got fired from his job at a mint factory
His wife went absolutely menthol
I have an unopened pack of gum from 1993
You could even say it's in...
..mint condition
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I installed Linux Mint on my laptop,
So I told my sister it had Mint on it. She then started l**... it.
I found some leftover candy canes from last year that were still in their packaging.
They were in mint condition.
What do you call a clock made of mint?
Thyme.
Friend Bought a Ticket for a motorsport event, and later realized that it is the same date as his wedding. He made a Facebook listing:
Church in Albstadt, Germany, Bride waiting in mint condition.
What do you call a wise plant?
Enlighten Mint!
TIL the mint in San Francisco does not produce any circulating coins
It doesn't make cents!
The absolute worst flavor mint...
has to be a condiment.
Why were people confused when the coin mint broke?
It didn't make any cents!
Did you know that buying really old candy cost a lot of money?
Especially when they are in mint condition
I'm selling a piece of gum
It's in mint condition
*rim shot*
What's a banker's favourite flavor of icecream?
Mint
I sold my foot that had the Tic-Tac toe today...
I heard collectors pay more for items in mint condition.
Why do new comic books smell so refreshing?
Because they're in mint condition.
A US mint worker couldn't figure out how to fix the penny-producing machine...
... once he figured it out it made sense.
There are these mints that are supposed to calm your nerves.
They have jokes on the inside of the packaging. I guess the real joke...
One time my ex looked into a tin of Altoids
It was ex sight mint!
I think retirement can lead to senility.
Because after my Grandpa quit working at the Federal Mint, he just stopped making cents.
What do you call prototype mint lollies?
Experimentos
The British mint is very odd.
It makes no cents.
I bought a mint condition vintage HiFi system
My wife said it's a waste of money, but I think it's a sound investment.
I found a vintage Altoids box from the 60s in my attic,
it was in mint condition
I have a York Patty Wrapper from 1941
Its in mint condition
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Last night in Jail they gave us mint chocolates for dessert. I thought they'd be be g**... but they were actually pretty good.
Turns out that in-prison mint isn't as bad as I expected.
I'm selling Amazon gift codes on eBay.
If anyone's interested, they are in a mint condition and only used once.
What did one herb say to his girlfriend?
"We're mint to be."
Workers at the Mint are going on strike.
They're sick and tired of making so much money!
I have a job at the mint making paper currency.
That's right, my job isn't making cents.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A little old lady is late for work
And settles into a pew at the back just as the priest is saying "And anyone who has recently committed adultery should stand up." Being somewhat hard of hearing, she asks the boy next to her to repeat what the priest just said. "He asked everyone who wants a mint to stand up." The boy replied mischievously.
The old lady unsteadily gets to her feet, much to the priest's horror. "At your age?" He exclaims, "You should be ashamed!" The old lady swiftly retorts "Just because I don't have any teeth left doesn't mean I can't s**... on something from time to time!"
My Cat's name in Minton
when he misbehaves, he is Bad Minton
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I stayed in an English Hotel that was so quaint that when I we first arrived, rather than a mint, there were a couple of cricket b**... and a bat on the bed.
Though the bat did fly out of the window after only a few minutes, and I never did find the rest of the cricket.
My son found a 5 year old tin of mints
I told him we mint to save them. He fired right back that they are in mint condition. (I'm so proud!)
