Mini Jokes
123 mini jokes and hilarious mini puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mini that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article is about mini jokes. Explore tongue-in-cheek humor related to mini products such as Opera Mini, Google Mini, Google Nest Mini, Google Home Mini, and the classic Mini. Make your friends laugh with jokes related to ceos, rubies, and mini skirts.
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Funniest Mini Short Jokes
Short mini jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mini humour may include short micro jokes also.
- If a mini quiz were called a quizzicle, what would a mini test be called? A quiz. Get your mind out of the gutter.
- Mini-Skirt Speech My speech today will be like a mini-skirt. Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to hold your attention!
- They always asked me if I play basketball because I was tall. They stopped asking me that when I asked them if they play mini golf.
- SEO Expert walks into a bar... An SEO expert walks into a bar, bars, beer garden, hangout, lounge, night club, mini bar, tavern, pub, beer, wine, whiskey...
- I called my girlfriend's mini skirt a fence Protects the property but doesn't spoil the view
- When I told my ex girlfriend that I wanted to break up, she tried gifting me a mini plastic figurine of myself in an attempt to salvage our relationship. I screamed, "Lego of me!"
- Apparently, all the tents from the game of thrones sets are being redecorated for use in a new mini-series on Genghis Khan. I am not sure why anyone is surprised about the recycled Khan tent.
- Whenever I feel fat, I go into the store and buy a Mini Bic. Each time, I get a little lighter.
- I ordered a soft drink in Minneapolis and couldn't believe how small it was Guess that's why it's in mini-soda.
- What do you call small rocks? mini-rals.
(found a book of jokes my daughter wrote when she was 8...this was the best of the lot)
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Mini One Liners
Which mini one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mini? I can suggest the ones about tiny and minor.
- I was thinking of buying the black iPad mini.. Apparently, it runs faster.
- Why do New Yorkers like to visit Minnesota? Because that's where the mini apple is!
- Which state serves the smallest drinks? Mini soda
- How much does a midget stripper with three kids get paid? Mini-mom wage.
- Why was the child able to fix the light bulb? Because mini hands make light work.
- What do you get when you order a mini meal at Five Guys? Two and a half men
- What are the Vikings favorite drink? Mini Sodas
- If you don't know a lot of creatures in Greek Mythology... I'll give you a mini-tour
- What do you call the opposite of an iPad mini? A maxipad.
- What kind of car do you drive before you hijack an airline? A DB Mini Cooper
- You know why ladies don't wear mini skirts in the winter? Cause they'll get chapped lips
- Statistics and mini skirts.. ...they hide more than what they reveal.
- I've started calling the smallest of my three dogs 'grandma' She has mini paws
- How do you get two whales in a Mini Cooper? Take the M4, across the Severn Bridge.
- What is James Bond's favorite pasta…? Mini Penne
Mini Golf Jokes
Here is a list of funny mini golf jokes and even better mini golf puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I always go to mini golf on the first date That way she is used to things being smaller than normal.
- If you're a tall person and someone asks you if you play basketball Ask them if they play mini golf
- What's the opposite of Mini Golf? Macro polo
- The person ahead of us today in mini golf completed the course in 23 strokes. I hope they're okay.
- What do you get when BMW, Volkswagen, and Callaway design a car together? A Mini Golf.
- Why do Catholics never play mini golf? Because they keep getting holes in nuns.
- What do you call a mini-golf club made of wasp t**... that's covered in Reese's Pieces? A peanut butter bee-nut putter.
- What's the difference between s**... and mini golf? Nothing. They're both fun for the first two holes, but then you just want to finish.
- What does an unchallenging mini-golf course have in common with a s**... club? During daytime hours they're both sub-par
- Why did the mini-golf course owner put a live donkey in the last hole? The move was completely a**...-in-nine.
Mini Cooper Jokes
Here is a list of funny mini cooper jokes and even better mini cooper puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- To tell me my zipper was open, a girl tells me, "your garage is open" I said, "did you see my ford mustang gt super sport?"
She said "No, but i did see your mini cooper with two flat tires" - What type of automobile do petite barrel-makers prefer? Mini Cooper.
- I got my wife a Mini Cooper for her birthday… Lord knows why she wants a midget who makes barrels…
- What did Mr. Cooper name his son? Mini Cooper
- What did the lead singer of The Prodigy say to the guy parking his Mini Cooper? Back my Smitch Up!
- what do bruce jenner and my mini cooper have in common? they both have t**... issues.
Mini Van Jokes
Here is a list of funny mini van jokes and even better mini van puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do midget skaters and couples with children have in common? Mini-Vans
- What do babies wear when they go skateboarding? Mini-Vans
- After s**... one night my wife said she wished she could get 3 more inches... So the next day I put a lift kit on her mini van.
- Those stickers of families you see on the back of mini-vans are like menus.. For s**... predators.
Opera Mini Jokes
Here is a list of funny opera mini jokes and even better opera mini puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Opera Mini 8 for Java and BlackBerry phones
Loads of Fun with Charming Humor Mini Jokes
What funny jokes about mini you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mint jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mini pranks.
In a crowded city at a bus stop, a beautiful young woman was waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather mini skirt, with matching tight leather boots and jacket...
As the bus rolled up and it became her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step on the bus.
Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she reached behind and unzipped her skirt a little, thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg.
Again, she tried to make the step onto the bus, only to discover she still couldn't!
So, a little more embarrassed, she once again reached behind and unzipped her skirt a little more and for a second time attempted the step and once again, still she could not raise her leg because of the tight skirt.
With a coy little smile to the driver, she again unzipped the offending skirt to give a little more slack and again was unable to make the step.
About this time, a big Texan that was behind her in the line picked her up easily from the waist and placed her lightly on the step of the bus.
Well, she went ballistic and turned on the would-be hero screeching at him, "How dare you touch my body!! I don't even know who you are!"
At this, the Texan drawled, "Well ma'am normally I would agree with you, but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured that we was friends."
HBO cancels "Luck" after horse deaths.
Their next endeavor is to make a mini series called "Glue".
A minister and a lawyer at the pearly gates.
A minister and a lawyer arrived at the pearly gates. Saint Peter greeted both of them and gave them their room assignments.
"Pastor, here are the keys to one of our nicest efficiency units. And for you, sir, (to the lawyer) the keys to our finest p**... suit."
"This is unfair!" cried the minister.
"Listen," Saint Peter said, "ministers are a dime a dozen up here, but this is the first lawyer we've seen."
Miniskirt
A small crowd gathers at a bus stop. A b**... blonde in a tight top and even tighter miniskirt shows up same time as the bus. Being a gentleman, a man lets her onto the bus first.
She goes to take her first step up the bus stairs, her legs are unable to take the step. The miniskirt was far too tight. Smiling apologetically to everyone, she reaches back to unzips the zipper a little. She attempts to step up the stairs, again, the skirt is still too tight. She reaches around her back, unzips the zipper a little. Smiling once more, she attempts to step up. Sigh, the skirt is still too tight, she reaches behind her a third time.
Two large hands grab her by the waist, lifting her up and placing her at the top of the steps. "Get your hands off me! How dare you touch me," she squealed.
"Ma'am, as much as I don't mind," the gentleman paused,"you were pulling down my zipper".
What is the opposite of an iPad Mini?
A m**... Pad
Why is a 12oz can of Coca-Cola more popular in St. Paul and Minneapolis than a 2 liter?
Because it's a mini soda.
Minimalism...
It's the least you can do.
Old enough
-Mom I'm finally 15, can I have a boyfriend?
-No.
-Can I use high Heels?
-No.
-Can I use a mini skirt?
-No.
-But why?
-Because you're a man, Bob.
What would EA do with a miniature man who used to be a woman?
Micro trans actions.
What is the preferred drink for people in St. Cloud?
Mini Soda
I've got some good news for small mothers...
They're raising the mini mum wage next year!
What has more minivans than a dealership?
A m**... church parking lot....
Choochie Green was a h**... in a little town,
One Sunday morning she's decides to go to church. She gets all dressed up, in her finest mini skirt and top. She arrives early to ensure a seat up close. While the rest of the congregation files in, the priest notices her. He leans over to the alter boy and ask "Is that Choochie Green?" The boy squints and leans forward and replies "I don't think so, just the way the lights hitting it"
How is a mini skirt like a fence?
They both protect the property but they don't spoil the view
I was frying up these mini Bratwursts I'd bought from a budget supermarket, when my wife asked, 'What are you cooking?'
To which I replied:
'They're Lidl sausages.'
How is the Copiapó mining accident and the Jared Fogle scandal the same?
In both cases some miners got s**...
A man messaged his ex : Just now ate a tuna taco and suddenly you came in my mind
She messaged him back : just now ordered a mini hot dog , it came in just 2 minutes. Suddenlu you came in my mind
The recent rise in minimum wage is a bit sexist...
What about the mini dads?
One minute I was m**... and the next thing I remember is waking up in the hospital.
Dr said it's a good thing my mom caught me in the middle of having a mini s**....
A minister is vacationing through the Holy Land
And is taking a historical trip to all of the sights associated with Jesus. Finally, he reaches the Sea of Galilee, where he is planning on taking a ferry boat across the water. Once he gets up to the ticket counter, however, he is shocked to learn the outrageous price of a ticket, and has to unfortunately end his trip early. As he walked away from the ticket counter, he was heard muttering well no wonder Jesus walked.
What is the name of Scotland's minister of fishing?
McRell
Civilian: Detective! There's been a robbery at my apartment!
Detective: What did they take?
Civilian: The TV, the music system, all the cash from my locker, the mini fridge, my most expensive bottle of champagne!
Detective: What was the point of entry?
Civilian: I guess they wanted to get rich
Who invented the mini skirt?
Seymour Heine
The ministry of excessive resource usage called.
Seventy-three times.
Me as a doctor...
There was a complication so I replaced ur eye w/a mini magic 8 ball
Patient: Seriously?
*shake his head. All signs point to yes
How many Trumps does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One, because mini hands make light work.
My miniature Siberian dog is gaining weight too fast.
He's a little Husky.
What is the minimum amount of birds to change a lightbulb?
One can't, but Toucan
What's the minimum GPA needed to go to USC?
$500,000.00
Joe saw a s**... young exotic girl walking out from a bank, a remote control dropped from her mini skirt.
He picked it up and planed to give it back.
But the girl looked at him, her face turned red and seemed nervous and coy.
Joe understood it all of a sudden...
He smiled obscenely and pressed the button on the remote.
Then the bank exploded.
PornHub now requires all visitors to watch at least 5 minutes of dwarf m**... content before accessing other videos.
That's the bare mini mum.
A guy tried to get me into an MLM plan for selling mini trees once.
Thankfully I realized before I joined that it was just a bonsai scheme.
I was out shopping with the wife the other day when i saw a group of young ladies all wearing mini skirts.
I said, "Ooh look at those legs, I bet you wish you had legs like them?"
She didn't answer, but I think it upset her because I heard her sniffle as I wheeled her up the ramp into the next store
What's the difference between a 1972 chevelle and a bic mini?
Well one is a heavy chevy and the other is a little lighter.
I saw a t**... in a mini skirt
I thought.. that shows a lot of b**....
A minister started his Children's sermon with a question. Who knows what the Resurrection is?
Without missing a beat a young boy says, "If you have one lasting more than 4 hours call your physician."
What do you call a midget cop who talks a lot in Minnesota?
A Minneapolis( mini yap police).
A foreign country's leader was cooking a small p**... of prime ribs
While cooking, he stirred the p**.... It was a prime mini stir
To whoever invented the mini skirt, you are a good person, thank you.
My b**... have never felt so free.
What's a Trump Supporter's favorite car?
A Mini Couper.
2 men in an airport
1st man says, "I can't find my wife." 2nd man says, "I can't find mine either, what does yours look like?" 1st man " Six foot tall, blonde, big t**..., mini skirt, high heels and a b**... tube, whats yours look like?" 2nd man says, "f**... her we'll look for yours.
My girlfriend and I have been really stressed and having some issues so we decided to take a mini vacation, a weekend trip to a ski resort.
Everything started off well, but things went downhill really fast.
A minister told his congregation:
"Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying. To help you understand my sermon, I want you all to read Mark 17."
The following Sunday, as he prepared to deliver his sermon, the minister asked for a show of hands. He wanted to know how many had read Mark 17. Nearly every hand went up.
The minister smiled and said, "Mark has only sixteen chapters. I will now proceed with my sermon on the sin of lying."
Dracula
Dracula is walking down the street one fine evening when a speeding lorry carrying mini sausage rolls, sandwiches, a variety of salads, dressed salmon, quiches and cold meats loses control, overturns and spills all that food. All this wreckage hits Dracula and with his dying breath he curses buffet the vampire slayer
I was out shopping with the wife when we came across a group of young ladies wearing mini skirts. I said, ooh look at them legs! I bet you had legs like them.
She didn't answer but I think she was upset since I heard her sniffle as I wheeled her up the ramp to Walmart.
I recently saw a t**... in a mini skirt in public and thought to myself...
that shows a lot of b**...!
I got a miniature abacus for my birthday.
It's the little things that count!
A minister, a priest and a rabbit walked into a blood bank.
The rabbit said I think I am a Type-O
A minister and his friend in the congregation were fans of rival sports teams.
When they were due to play each other, the two made a gentleman's agreement not to pray for their team.
The minister's team ended up losing quite badly, and he decided to tease his friend about it from the pulpit on Sunday.
"My friends, you know that Doug and I back different teams. We said we wouldn't pray for our team to win, but obviously, Doug cheated," he grinned at his friend and the congregation chuckled.
"Preacher, I didn't do that," Doug shot back. "I just asked God to let the best team win!"
Last night, I was hit in the face with one of those mini beer cans
Don't worry, I'm fine. But it did leave a small brews.
A minister was making farewell visits before moving to a new parish.
An elderly woman of the congregation paid him the compliment of suggesting that his successor would not be as good as he had been.
Nonsense, he replied, flattered.
No, really, she insisted. * I've lived here under six different ministers, and each new one has been worse than the last. *
What does a minimalist grizzly have on him at all times ?
The bear essentials.
What's the minimum number of people it takes to screw in a light bulb?
Two but it has to be a really big light bulb.
Minister: "I couldn't help notice that your husband walked out of my sermon this morning."
Lady: "Don't take it personally, he's been walking in his sleep for years."
A minister asked me, "Why do we spend hours on the internet but only minutes on our knees?"
I said "Golly!, reverend Keller, my boyfriend can't last that long.
