COP: Whose car is this? Where are you headed? What do you do?
Miner: mine
But these are just miner details.
Show him a row of shovels and tell him to take his pick.
Cop: Who's car is this? Where are you headed? What do you do?
Miner: Mine.
"Sir, whose car is this? Where are you headed? What do you do as a profession?"
And the miner replies "Mine."
A flat miner
I call it 'A Miner in a Minor' in A minor.
A minor minor miner
He's been working out in the gold mines for 6 months and is desperately craving the company of a woman. He walks up to the bartender and asks, "I don't suppose you have any women? I haven't had sex in months..."
The bartender replies, "No, sorry... BUT we do have Chinaman Charlie out back if you want".
The miner says "Thanks, but I don't swing that way", and turns around and heads back to the mines.
He comes back in another 6 months, and asks again. "Do you have any women since I was here last time?"
"No, but we still have Chinaman Charlie"
"Sorry, I don't swing that way". The miner buys a whiskey and turns around and walks out the door and goes back to work in the mines.
6 months after that, the miner comes back to the bar.
"You get any women? It's been a year since my first visit..."
"No man, sorry. We still have Chinaman Charlie though".
Now, the miner is pretty desperate at this point. It's been 18 months since he last got laid, and he's tired of waiting. After some deep consideration, the miner sighs and says, "Alright fine. The only people that'll know about this is you, me, and Chinaman Charlie, right?"
"Yep. And the two men that hold him down," says the bartender.
"Why would there be two men holding him down?" The miner asks with a confused look on his face.
"Chinaman Charlie doesn't swing that way either".
Miner: Mine.
One day, after striking gold in Alaska, a Lonesome miner came down from the mountains and walked into a saloon in the nearest town.
"I'm lookin' for the meanest, toughest and roughest hooker in the Yukon," he said to the bartender.
"We got her" replied the bartender. "She's upstairs in the second room on the right."
The miner handed the bartender a gold nugget to pay for the hooker and two beers. He grabbed the bottles, stomped up the stairs, kicked the door open on the second door on the right and yelled, "I'm looking for the meanest roughest and toughest hooker in the Yukon."
The woman inside the room looked at the miner and said, "You found her!"
Then she stripped naked, bent over and grabbed her ankles.
"How do you know I want that position first?" asked the miner.
"I don't," replied the hooker, "but I thought you might want to open those beers first."
German miner, "herr supervisor, we're working so many hours and we're so efficient that within a year we will run out of ore to mine."
Mine Supervisor, "this is a problem. A very bad problem."
Miner, "what do you suggest we do?"
Supervisor, "Mein Fuhrer."
A Miner.
By stripping or working the shaft.
It was a miner frustration
Yeah, in most states it's illegal to have sex with a miner.
I had to quit because whenever I put my mining hat on I felt light-headed.
A miner
And the other responds, "sure does".
She says it's against the law to be with a miner.
He escaped with miner injuries.
He showed me something
And I immediately burst out laughing
What was it?
A shiny yellow stone
It was comedy gold
Get tone of A Flat Miner.
A grizzled old miner comes out of the wilderness and steps into the pub. Pulling out a gold nugget and placing it on the bar he asks the bartender "You got any whiskey in this establishment?"
The bartender complies and places a glass and a bottle in front of the miner.
After a few drinks the miner asks the bartender "You got any women in this establishment?"
The bartender replies "No, but we've got old Joe out back."
The miner shakes his head and says. "It's been a long while, but I'm not into that sort of thing."
After quite a few more drinks he calls the bartender over again and says "So lets say I was into that sort of thing after all, who would have to know about it?"
"Just you, me and those guys at the table over there" replies the bartender.
"Those guys? Why would those guys need to know?" asks the miner
"Well they gotta hold Old Joe down. He's not into that sort of thing either."
Three women were sitting around throwing back a few drinks and talking about their love lives.
One woman said, "I call my husband the dentist. Nobody can drill like he does."
The second woman giggled and confessed, "I call my husband the miner because of his incredible shaft."
The third woman quietly sipped her whiskey until her friend asked, "So, what do you call your husband?"
She frowned and said, "The postman."
"Why the postman?"
"Because he always delivers late, and half the time it's in the wrong box."
A flat miner
He was in a deep depression.
The conversation got rocky.
He's approached by a blacksmith who says, "I'll take it."
The miner questions, "Which one?"
Blacksmith replies," Either ore."
BADUMTISSSS
Stibnite, because it's antimony.
Mine your own business!
(Courtesy of my nine year old)
NSFW
A miner walks into a saloon after striking it rich, walks over to the barkeep and says " I want your coldest beer, and the meanest, nastiest woman you've got in this place."
The bartender hands him a bottle of cold beer and sends him down the hall. As the miner opens the door he says "I'm looking for the meanest nastiest woman here." A woman replies "you found me" as she flips up her skirt and bends over.
"What makes you think I want to do it like that?" The miner asks.
She says "I don't, but you want to open your beer right?"
Cop: Whose car is this?
Where are you going?
What do you do for a living?
Miner: Mine.
It made contact with a miner.
And the other responded, Sure does.
The Miner really digs the music.
But it was just a miner inconvenience
A hundred thousand!
One miner to change it, and 99,999 to determine who gets the credit.
A miner spelling error.
He dug himself into a hole he couldn't get out of.
He sits down and orders a shot. After the shot he asks, "Does anybody want to hear a blonde joke?"
The lady next to him leans over. She says, "Hey buddy, so I'm gonna tell you this because it seems like you don't know any better. I'm a blonde coal miner, that woman over at the bar is a blonde professional boxer, the bartender is a blonde cage fighter, that woman at the pool table is a blonde steel mill worker, and shes a blonde bouncer. So buddy, are you sure you still want to tell that blonde joke?"
To which the blind man responds, "Well no, not if I've got to explain it five times."
Either ore.
Tracy said, "I call my husband the dentist. Nobody can drill like he does." Cathy giggled and confessed, "I call my husband the miner because of his incredible shaft." Dawn quietly sipped her whiskey until Tracy asked, "Say, what do you call your husband?" Dawn frowned and said, "The postman." "Why the postman?" asked Cathy. "Because he always delivers late, and half the time it's in the wrong box."
A flat miner
She was a gold digger.
It is believed the labor involved in this risky job was causing miner pain.
Au, yeah!
And the bartender says, We don't serve your kind here.
The coal miner snorts, You mean you don't serve 'minors'? Never heard that one before.
No, I mean we don't serve black people. '
I'm not a hole man any more.
Au you got my gold.
After a long day of work, he decided to play some sports with his friends. There was an accident, which caused the man to die.
This shows that miner errors can have huge consequences.
A flat miner
She was charged with unlawful sexual conduct with a miner.
A molehill out of the mountain.
A hickaxe
He had sex with a miner
The one with a lot of apatite.
He was a miner.
"I dig it"
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