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Mime Jokes

99 mime jokes and hilarious mime puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mime that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Mime Short Jokes

Short mime jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mime humour may include short mute jokes also.

  1. "Son, I don't think you're cut out to be a mime." "Was it something I said?" Asks the son.
    "Yes."
  2. Every year, hundreds of kids are shipped off to mime school... ...never to be heard from again.
  3. My instructor just told me that I'm not cut out to be a mime It must have been something I said
  4. Did you here about the woman who got attacked by a gang of mimes? They performed unspeakable acts on her.
  5. Once I got kicked out of a library for being a mime. Because actions speak louder than words
  6. A mime was arrested after getting into a bar fight and breaking his left arm. He still has the right to remain silent.
  7. A mime fell down a well and couldn't call for help. His larynx was crushed during the fall.
  8. My old best friend ran off years ago to pursue his dream of becoming a mime... I haven't heard from him since.
  9. Son, you're just not cut out to be a mime Why dad, is it something I said?
    ...Yes
  10. I confronted a mime today. He did unspeakable things.

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Mime One Liners

Which mime one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mime? I can suggest the ones about pong and paste.

  1. Last night I was attacked by a gang of mimes. They did unspeakable things to me.
  2. "Son you're just not cut out to be a mime." "Is it something I said?"
    "Yes."
  3. Ive just been molested by a group of mime artists... They did unspeakable things to me.
  4. If I was invisible for a day... I'd kick a mime artist to death.
  5. Why was the mime arrested? He committed an unspeakable crime
  6. Last night I played a blank tape at full volume. The mime next door went nuts.
  7. My wife was abducted by a gang of mimes. They did unspeakable things to her.
  8. When I was a child, I was kidnapped by mimes They did unspeakable things to me
  9. I was kidnapped by a group of mimes They threatened to do unspeakable things !
  10. I was captured and tortured by an mime He did unspeakable things to me
  11. I got expelled from mime school. It must have been something I said.
  12. Did you hear about the Mime Murders? It was an unspeakable horror
  13. I was kidnapped by mimes once. They did unspeakable things to me.
  14. I played a blank CD at full blast yesterday ...the mimes next door went nuts.
  15. I was attacked by a group of mime artists. They did unspeakable things to me.

Mime joke, I was attacked by a group of mime artists.

Comical & Quirky Mime Jokes for a Roaring Good Time

What funny jokes about mime you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mess jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mime pranks.

My late wife was abducted by a troupe of travelling Mime artists.

The police informed me, they did... Unspeakable things to her.

My ex was gang r**... by a troupe of mime artists.

They performed unspeakable acts on her.

Apparently mime on mime violence is a real problem, you just don't hear about it.

What did the mime say after killing the p**...?

I hate street performers

But then again I'm a mime artist so I can't really talk

My dad once told me I would make a great mime...

I was speechless.

The first rule about mime club...

Is you don't talk about mime club.

Just been told I've got the job as a mime

...
I'm speechless.

A mime that texts LOL is dishonest.

There was a m**... at the mime convention

Everyone was left speechless

My girlfriend said that me being a mime was too much, and she was leaving

But I couldn't bring myself to say anything

I've just found out that one of my best friends is a mime artist.

He kept that quiet.

What does mime use to cut to cut bread?

A charaded knife.

A mime is performing an act in Paris

An Englishman, Frenchman, Spanish man, and German man are watching the mime perform. The mime notices that they cannot see him very well. He places a box down and signals to the audience if they can see him.

"Yes"

"Oui"

"Sí"

"Ja"

My friend said he was going to become a mime

I haven't heard from him in a while

My daughter wanted me to be a mime for her birthday party.

I was speechless.

Yesterday I was held hostage by a mime.

He performed unspeakable acts on me.

I'm a Mime rapper

I call myself Gnat. Cause I'm a silent G.

Why did the librarian hush the mime?

Because actions speak louder than words.

What's the best thing about being a female mime?

There's no glass ceiling

"Ninja kills Mime"

Nobody heard about it

The police thought they had a break trying to figure out all these clown sightings.

They brought a mime in for questioning but he refused to talk.

A Spaniard, a Frenchman, an Englishman, and a German are walking down a street in Paris...

... when they see a mime. He calls them over and asks if they want to see him perform. The group respond with a cheerful yes and the mime begins his performance. He gets up on a box and asks the group if they can clearly see him.
The group says:

*"Yes"*
*"Oui"*
*"Si"*
*"Ja"*

A mime once nearly had me convinced that a wall was actually there...

...but it was just an obstacle illusion.

Why do mimes always lose arguments?

They don't have a say in anything!

I hear that mime crime is a big problem in Paris these days.

Apparently they do unspeakable things if you resist.

My friend is training to become a mime.

He just won't shut up about it.

Growing up, I knew I had what it takes to become a mime...

But my father didn't see it.

How does a mime walk around?

Goes without saying.

Why can't mimes work in packing and shipping?

Because they just can't think outside the box !

Why does it smell so bad when a mime has a s**...?

Because it's Silent But Deadly

Police issued a warning of an escape criminal who is a mime

The police also said that the criminal have done unspeakable things

A friend of mine was s**... assaulted by a gang of mime artists last night...

They did unspeakable things to him.

If a mime went jihadi and did a s**... b**......

Would it be an unspeakable act of terrorism?

A man says to his psychologist...

"I keep thinking about killing my wife. Sometimes, I even mime out bashing her brains in with a brick"
"I'm absolutely certain that you're not capable of that" replied the psychologist.
"You're sure?"
"Yes, judging by what you've told me, she's far too hardheaded for that to work"

Did you hear about all the kids who were shipped off to mime school?

They were never heard from again.

I don't think I'd ever want to be a mime...

It just doesn't speak to me.

You come across three performing mimes. One is in an invisible box, one is cutting an invisible rope, and one is fighting an invisible man. Which one failed mime school?

The one who won't shut up about it.

Mime on mime violence is rampant.

But you just never hear about it.

What did one mime say to the other?

Nothing
(My mom told me this one)

My deaf girlfriend gave me a valentines card..

It said "will you be mime?"

Which disease is most tragic for a mime?

Gesticular cancer.

A mime got fired.

He got caught thinking outside the box at his workplace.

My brother ran away from home to study mime.

We never heard from him again.

I love watching a mime artist

I even give him invisible money

My friend asked how my mime career was going...

I said I'd rather not talk about it.

I hosted a silent disco party in my apartment

I got a complaint from the mime next door.

My friends say I'm always putting up walls and never talk to them

I don't think they understand what a mime is

I wrote a 200,000 word novel about a French actor who is persecuted for his art.

It's called, "Mime and Punishment".

Kicked a mime in the nuts today.

Very effective unmute option.

I was kidnapped my a mime

He threatened to do unspeakable things.

Mime

Got beat up by a mime the other day!! He did unspeakable things to me.

"Hello I'd like to register for mime classes"

"Ah, say no more"

I just strangled a mime....

With a cordless phone.

I got kicked out of my local Mime troupe yesterday. They didn't like me too much...

I guess it was something I said.

How did the mime keep getting laid?

He could do unspeakable things in the bedroom.

An Englishman, a Frenchman, A Spaniard and a German go to the theater to watch a mime show.

The men have bad eyesight so they are squinting through the whole performance.
The mime sees their problem and stops the show and moves them to the front row. He then ask, "Can you see me now?"
The men Respond:
YES
OUI
SI
JA

My wife was kidnapped by two mime artists

She said they did some unspeakable things to her!

I got kidnapped by a Mime once.

It did unspeakable things to me

Had to break up with my girlfriend, who's a mime

She just kept putting up walls between us 😔

I'm worried…

I haven't seen or heard from my imaginary girlfriend since she started taking mime classes.
I'm not sure if she is rehearsing, or if she has left me.

I just found out that my girlfriend is a mime.

I can't believe that after all these years, she never told me.

A mime in my town was arrested by the police after he broke his left hand in a bar fight.

He still….has the right to remain silent.

If the police arrest a mime,

do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

Mime joke, If the police arrest a mime,

jokes about mime