Middle Eastern Jokes
120 middle eastern jokes and hilarious middle eastern puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about middle eastern that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Middle Eastern Short Jokes
Short middle eastern jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The middle eastern humour may include short middle east jokes also.
- My father complained "I've been using a dating app, but I'm only meeting Middle Eastern men." Dad, you're using Uber.
- I felt a rush of culture shock wash over me as I walked through a middle eastern market It was bazaar
- Apparently they're making a Middle Eastern version of 'The Flintstones'... ...and while Dubai doesn't like it, Abu Dhabi do.
- Apparently my attempt at recreating authentic Middle Eastern recipe gave everyone food poisoning... I falafel.
- I want to open a restaurant that fuses Chinese and Middle Eastern cuisine I call it "Wok like an Egyptian".
- My Middle Eastern dad has learned English from watching infomercials. So when I would get in trouble as a kid and get punished, he would finish by saying "But wait, there's more!"
- For some reason I'm only afraid of Middle Eastern spiders... It's O.K. though. My doctor says it's normal to be Iraqnaphobic.
- Jokes are sort of like Middle Eastern policies. Some are decent, but it's really the execution that counts.
- What's the name for a Middle Eastern fowl that can bowl three strikes in a row? Turkey turkey turkey
- What did the Middle Eastern dictator say after he had lunch? I ate too many chickpeas, now I falafel.
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Middle Eastern One Liners
Which middle eastern one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with middle eastern? I can suggest the ones about oriental and eastern european.
- I had some bad middle eastern food yesterday I just felafel afterwards.
- I had too much Middle Eastern food today. Now I falafel.
- What happens when you eat too much Middle Eastern food? You feelafel
- That weird middle eastern guy insisted on giving me a ride home Iran
- I traded my blowup doll in for a middle eastern version.. It blows itself up..
- I recently switched to an all Middle Eastern diet and can't say I recommend it I falafel.
- What do you call someone who is attracted to Middle Easterns? A Hummusexual.
- What do you call a middle eastern elvis presley impersonator? Amal Shookup
- I saw a very odd Middle Eastern market the other day. It was quite bazaar.
- Why don't I enjoy certain middle eastern food? Because it just makes me falafel.
- Most Middle Eastern Nations don't like the Flintstones.. But ABU DHAIBI DOO!
- My car wouldn't start so I called my favorite middle eastern company to help me Camel Tow
- Did you hear about the Middle-Eastern balet? It was very Arab-esque.
- What kind of soap do Middle Eastern citizens use? Arab spring
- How do middle easterners get rid of wrinkles Iraning
Hilarious Fun Middle Eastern Jokes That Will Have You Rolling with Laughter
What funny jokes about middle eastern you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean eastern jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make middle eastern pranks.
A rich middle eastern oil tycoon sends his son to study in Germany...
His son is feeling nervous about being alone abroad. So, his father allows him to take one of the golden plated Ferraris to Germany in order to boost his confidence. It is shipped over and the father hears nothing for the first few weeks from his son. Then, he recieves an email:
"Father,
I love the way the Ferrari drives but it's so embarrassing, all the other students take trains to school! What should I do?
Your loving son"
The father then replies the next day
"Son,
The gold plated train is on its way
Dad"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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What do you call a middle eastern sorceress?
A sandwitch
A bearded guy
A bearded, middle-eastern guy boards a plane. As soon as he enters he shouts "hijack!". All the passengers are scared to death. Some start crying. Then a white guy from the back stands up and says "oh hi Ahmed, didn't expect to see you here.."
What does a Middle-Eastern person eat for breakfast?
Syria-l
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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I made fun of my Middle Eastern friend's food the other day
Now I falafel about it.
UN Food Survey Fails...
UN Phone Survey
Last month, a world-wide telephone survey was conducted by the UN.
The only question asked was:
"Would you please give your honest opinion about possible solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"
The survey was a complete failure because:
In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" meant.
In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" meant.
In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant.
In China they didn't know what "opinion" meant.
In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" meant.
In South America they didn't know what "please" meant.
In the USA they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant.
And in Australia , New Zealand and Britain everyone hung up as soon as they heard the Indian accent.
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Why did the Middle Eastern man not want his daughter to go on a date with a boy from school?
He was afraid she would come home s**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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What's the difference between American girls and Middle Eastern girls?
American girls get s**... BEFORE they commit adultery.
So the Middle Eastern restaurant near my house has been selling baby meat
I regret ordering the 'pita platter of tiny feet'
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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Why did the man v**... after eating Middle Eastern food?
It made his stomach falafel.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a Middle Eastern bodybuilder?
Arnold s**....
After shopping for the first time overseas in a middle eastern market, the American tourist was quoted saying
"How bazaar"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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What does an american teenager and a middle eastern feminist have in common?
They're both getting s**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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I hate it when..
I hate it when my black friend disappears in the dark,
My white friend in snow,
My Chinese friend in sand,
And my Middle-Eastern friend in drone strike.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
This Heat is Like a Middle Eastern Dictator...
This Heat is Like a Middle Eastern Dictator. It's oppressive, you can't get away from it, and I'm pretty sure we can blame the U.S. for it.
I saw the middle eastern version of "Horton Hears a Who" the other day
It was called "Achmed Hears a Boom"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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What did the middle eastern man say to his m**... enthusiast wife?
s**...!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A young woman learned that you can smoke in the rain if you make a hole in a c**... and put it over the cigarette.
She goes to a convenience store and asks a middle eastern clerk for a c**.... The guy looks at her with obvious disapproval, but does his job. He asks her what kind she wants and she answers,
I don't really care, as long as it fits the camel
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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What do you call a middle eastern man with a bounty on his head?
A t**....
I had to return those books on Middle Eastern agricultural products.
They were past the Dubai dates.
The United Nations world-wide survey
The United Nations sent out a survey to all the nations in the different continents of the world.
The survey went like this:
"We want your honest opinion on how to find a solution to the food shortage in the rest of the world"
The survey of course, turned out to be a total and abject failure:
The People in western Europe didn't know what the word 'shortage' meant. The people in eastern Europe had no idea what the expression 'honest' was supposed to mean. In china no one knew what 'opinion' was. In Africa they didn't know what 'food' was. In the middle east no one could figure out what 'solution' was; and in america they had no idea what 'the rest of the world' meant.
So I was eating some Middle Eastern food...
...but then my fala fell
How does a middle eastern man see himself?
Amir.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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What's the difference between Western and Middle -Eastern atheists?
Western atheists have heads.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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Why does Middle Eastern civilization have no major accomplishments?
It's too sunni for physical labour and everyone has s**...'ite for brains.
Apparently they're making a Middle Eastern version of 'The Flintstones'...
And they're going to call it 'Modern Family.'
What did the hungover middle eastern man say when he woke up?
I falafel.
Did you hear about the Middle Eastern beauty contest?
Me neither.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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I'm opening a line of Middle Eastern restaurants...
It'll be called the Allah Snackbar
Im not one to disagree with middle Easterns
So Yeah men
I saw a scary looking Middle-Eastern man
so Iran
A middle eastern man walks into a southeast American bar...
and says to the bartender, "Hello, I am Amarrah Kaan."
The bartender says, "No you ain't."
What do you call a table of Middle Eastern hor d'oeuvres?
Allahu Snackbar
Why was the Middle Eastern man cold when he got out of the shower?
Because of the Towel-ban
What did the Middle Eastern sheepherder say when he was asked what animal he was herding
Islam
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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Why do middle eastern countries hate south park?
Because of the Towely-ban.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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What do you call an angry middle-eastern man with bad eyes?
A cross-eyed cross sayed
What do you call a Middle Eastern pepper?
A Halal-peno.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why was the middle eastern woman unemployed?
Cuz she quit hijab.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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What do you call a middle eastern c**...?
A sultine!
Where do Middle Easterners hide their spare keys?
In Kuwait, because it's under Iraq.
Match the middle eastern country to its sworn enemy...
- Bahrain
- Lebanon
- Qatar
- United Arab Emirates
- Egypt
- Syria
- Jordan
- Iran
- Iraq
- Saudi Arabia
- Algeria
- Morocco
- Yemen
- Oman
- Kuwait
1. Israel
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Does anyone else have a hard time when people describe middle eastern looking folks as "ISIS"?
Im still called them Al Quada, it's a tough habit to break.
What's the most popular vegetable in Middle-Eastern countries?
Allahpeños.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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What's the difference between a Middle Eastern preschool and an ISIS training camp?
I have no idea, I just fly the drone
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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What do you call a Middle Eastern p**...?
A h**...
What do you call a nationalistic middle-eastern?
a Pakistan
What do you call a female middle eastern stripper?
Sheikha Bouti
What do you call a male middle eastern stripper?
Sheikh Madiq
So, you're the leader of a country who wants access to the Eastern Mediterranean, Balkans and Middle East, but you're not able to get it?
Oh, Crimea river.
The United States EX Middle Eastern National Outreach Work program.
Also known as the USEXMENOW program
Did you hear about the Middle Eastern chef who died while working on his cookbook?
It will be released post-hummus....
Where do middle eastern babies wear bibs?
In drool-salem.
Someone threw middle eastern food at my friends
They must falafel.
What language do middle eastern pirates speak?
ARRR-ABIC!!
Breaking bread with your middle-eastern friends...
Is a naan-secular activity everyone can enjoy.
The UN decided to do a worldwide survey...
The only question asked was: "Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?" The survey was a huge flop. In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant. In Eastern Europe, they didn't know what "honest" meant. In Western Europe, they didn't know what "shortage" meant. In China, they didn't know what "opinion" meant. In the Middle East, they didn't know what "solution" meant. In South America, they didn't know what "please" meant. And in the USA, they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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Im so smart for thinking of this
o**... says to another: Hey, did you know, there's a Middle Eastern country on the Mediterranean Sea, and it's regarded by Jews, Christians and Muslims as the biblical Holy Land!
The other guy says: I don't believe you, you're talking rubbish.
So the first guy says: No, it isreal!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a middle eastern french bread pizza?
Mustouffers... I'll see myself out.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you know that all pieces of reflective glass are middle eastern?
It's Amir.
Communion bread on Amazon is $13 for 2.3oz. At 7 packages per pound and assuming a middle eastern mans adult weight at ~140lbs, $12,740 buys you one Christ.
What do you call a Middle Eastern carpenter?
Ahmed Ashed
What is it called when you're afraid of middle eastern spider species?
Iraqnophobia
I ordered a map of a Middle Eastern country online and it never arrived
I guess I got Egypt.
Two hippies are in a bar.
One asks the other "So you said you were going to a Middle Eastern country, no?"
The other says "Yemen".
I've finally found out who the caravan is really hiding
Somewhere, deep within the caravan between ISIS, MS-13, middle easterners, and Santa Claus...
Is Waldo.
