Middle Child Jokes
26 middle child jokes and hilarious middle child puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about middle child that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Middle Child Short Jokes
Short middle child jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The middle child humour may include short second born jokes also.
- Danny and Kathy sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love, then comes marriage... Then comes watching your child slowly die because you were too upper middle class to vaccinate them.
- Trouble of Child's name. Question: Why do parents give children a middle name?
Answer: So the child knows when it is in seriously in trouble - Happy Middle Child's Day! Oh you didn't realise it was Middle Child's Day? Of course not, no one ever does.
- A woman was quite upset to find that her partner had named their child Fuh. But she was even more upset that the child's middle name was Q.
- If my child was mentally slow . Its' first name would be Speed and middle name would be Limit
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Middle Child One Liners
Which middle child one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with middle child? I can suggest the ones about middle part and middle.
- Last week was National Middle Child Week! Nobody noticed...
- Happy Middle Child Day! It was yesterday.....
...yesterday is always Middle Child Day. - Why is Steve Jobs middle child unemployed? Because he's always inbetween jobs.
- The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
Playful Middle Child Jokes to Add Joy and Laughter to Your Group
What funny jokes about middle child you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean youngest child jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make middle child pranks.
Password security questions for the depressed
What is the name of your least favorite child?
In what year did you abandon your dreams?
What is the maiden name of your father's mistress?
At what age did your childhood pet run away?
What was the name of your favorite unpaid internship?
In what city did you first experience ennui?
What is your ex-wife's newest last name?
What sports team do you fetishize to avoid meaningful discussion with others?
What is the name of your favorite canceled TV show?
What was the middle name of your first rebound?
On what street did you lose your childlike sense of wonder?
When did you stop trying?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The eldest of three siblings comes up to his mother and asks: "Mommy, mommy, why is my name Leaf?"
"Well, honey," the mother says, "it's because when you were a little baby, a leaf landed on your head."
Satisfied, the child goes away.
Later, the middle child tugs at her mother's hand. "Mommy, mommy, why is my name Feather?"
"Well, darling," the mother says, "it's because when you were a little baby, a feather floated down and landed on your head."
The little girl smiles and goes on her way.
A few moments later the youngest child runs into the room and says: "WARGLBARGLAAHRGLB?"
The mother says: "Shut up, Refrigerator."
I knocked on my father's door in the middle of the night, begging him to let me in. I said, "Please let me stay here dad, I'm a wanted man."
He said, "That's impossible son. You weren't even a wanted child."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So a little boy and a child m**... are walking though a forest in the middle of the night.
The little boy says,"I'm scared."
So the m**... says,"You're scared? I've gotta walk back alone!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
LifeProTip: If your child wants to help name your pet...
..let them pick the middle name. That way if they pick something silly, you can still refer to your pet by the normal name. For example, my 4 year old's rabbit is now named
Peter "floppy-eared-princess" Smith
Similarly, my 15 year old's gecko is named
Freddy "f**...-you-this-isn't-a-phase" Smith
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
One saturday morning,three boys came down to the kitchen and sits around the breakfast table. Their mother asks the oldest boy what he'd like to eat.
I'II have some f**...' French toast, he says. The mother is outraged at hid crude language. She hits him and sends him to his room.
When she calms down, she asks the middle child what he wants. well, I guess that leaves more f**...' french toast for me, he says. The mom is livid. She smacks hum and sends him away.
Finally, she looks at the youngest son and asks him ehat he wants for breakfast.
I don't know, he says meekly, but I definitely don't want the f**...' french toast!
A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters...
A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about having a son. They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted.
The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy. The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son. He was horrified at the ugliest child he had ever seen. He told his wife: "There's no way I can be the father of this baby. Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered! Have you been fooling around behind my back?" The wife smiled sweetly and replied: "Not this time!"
There was a middle-aged couple...
who had two stunningly beautiful blonde teenage daughters. They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted.
After months of trying, the wife became pregnant and, sure enough, nine months later, delivered a healthy baby boy.
The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son. He took one look and was horrified to see the ugliest child he had ever seen. He went to his wife and said that there was no way that he could be the father of that child: "Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered."
Then he gave her a stern look and asked, "Have you been fooling around on me?"
The wife just smiled sweetly and said, "Not this time."
Fooling Around On Me?
A middle-aged couple, with two beautiful daughters, decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted.
Soon, the wife became pregnant, and, nine months later, delivered a baby boy.
The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son, but was horrified to find an incredibly-ugly baby.
He went to his wife and said, "I cannot possibly be the father of that hideous child. Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered."
When his wife blushed, he became suspicious, and demanded, "Have you been fooling around on me?"
His wife confessed, "Not this time."
There was a father who called his 5 small children together.
As they sat together in a circle on the floor the dad placed a toy in the middle.
He explained to them that he won this toy as a door prize and he wanted to give it to one of them.
He asked them who is the most obedient?
Five sets of eyes looked up at him.
Sensing that they didn't understand the word he then asked, ok, who always obeys mommy, and does everything she says?
One of the children picked up the toy and handed it to the father. You win! exclaimed the child.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An attractive middle-aged woman sits at a bar...
... she orders a drink and a man sits beside her. They are both looking rather glum so she asks him what's the matter. He replies that he has a large chicken farm but none of the hens are laying fertile eggs, if this continues he will be out of business very soon. The man notices the woman is rather upset too, so he asks what her woes are. She says with a sigh 'I am just like one of your chickens' and continues to explain that for many years she and her ungrateful husband had tried to have a child, nothing had worked. They sit in silence for a short time, the woman looks at the man and asks if there is anything he can do to fix his chicken problem. He replies, 'I suppose I could try changing c**...' she winks at him, ' I suppose I could try that too'
Identical twins were put up for adoption and separated at birth...
...20 years later, their biological parents decided to find and meet them.
After many hours of research, they discovered that one child had been adopted by a middle-eastern family and had been named Amal Allamedan, while the other boy had been adopted by a family in Chile and had been named Juan Cerejo.
They set out to meet their son in Chile first. After meeting with him and having a wonderful time, the mother was ready to go meet her other son, but her husband disagreed.
When she asked why they couldn't go see him, he replied, "Well, if you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
French Toast
Three kids come down to the kitchen and sit around the breakfast table. The mother asks the oldest boy what he'd like to eat. "I'll have some f**...' French toast," he says. The mother is outraged at his language, hits him, and sends him upstairs. She asks the middle child what he wants. "Well, I guess that leaves more f**...' French toast for me," he says. She is livid, smacks him, and sends him away. Finally she asks the youngest son what he wants for breakfast. "I don't know," he says meekly, "but I definitely don't want the f**...' French toast."