Microsoft Jokes

Funniest Microsoft Short Jokes

Short microsoft jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The microsoft humour may include short founder jokes also.

1. Corona must have hit India hard... I´ve not recieved a single phone call this week from
   Microsoft to warn me about a virus on my computer.
2. Microsoft is working on software for self-driving vehicles. I can't wait until my car suddenly stops in the middle of the highway and reboots to install updates.
3. Today I discovered someone had stolen my activation for Microsoft Office... I don't know who you but I will find you, you have my word.
4. If you were to write a direct, very short introduction for Microsoft Office's word processor, it might be a... ...forward four-word foreword for Word.
5. Microsoft Boss : How good are you at making spreadsheet?
   Me : I excel at it
   Boss : Was that a Microsoft office pun?
   Me : word
6. Don't complain about Microsoft skipping Windows 9. They've never been able to count. They came out with Microsoft DOS without ever releasing Microsoft uno.
7. I get anxious whenever I have to use the default Microsoft web browser Using Firefox helps take the *Edge* off.
8. I thought bill gates would cave and release the new Microsoft Office early. But he kept his Word.
9. When Microsoft and Apple ship faulty products Microsoft: We will fix that faulty battery timer through a software update. *never fixes it though*
   Apple: *quietly removes the battery timer*
10. Someone had the audacity to delete every version of Microsoft Office from my computer. I have no Words.

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Microsoft One Liners

Which microsoft one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with microsoft? I can suggest the ones about processor and microsoft excel.

1. Who ever stole my copy of Microsoft Office is in trouble. You have my Word.
2. When Chuck Norris updates Windows ...Microsoft accepts his terms and conditions
3. Why is Microsoft so bad at writing music? Because they can only use OneNote!
4. Microsoft Edge is a big improvement over IE... It downloads Chrome twice as fast!
5. How soft is Bill Gate's pillow? Microsoft.
6. The opposite of Microsoft Office is... MacroHard OnFire
7. Did you hear that Microsoft is giving away Office to parents? Word to your mother.
8. I took a Microsoft Office class and got an A I Excelled at it.
9. I've created a writing software to rival Microsoft. It's their Word against mine.
10. What did Microsoft employees say to Bill Gates after his motivational speech? Word.
11. A knife with a foam blade? Microsoft Edge.
12. Now that Microsoft is so big, should it be called Macrosoft
13. Why couldn't Bill Gates get any girls? His hardware was Microsoft
14. Why do Microsoft products cost money? You gotta pay the Bill
15. Why did Bill Gates' wife divorce him? Because, he was always microsoft in bed.

Microsoft Office Jokes

Here is a list of funny microsoft office jokes and even better microsoft office puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A thief took my Microsoft Office license key I'll come and get you thief! You have my Word
• Did you hear the latest Microsoft Office update can cure depression? It gives you an improved Outlook
• People who don't use Microsoft office are often called Libretarians.
• To the person who stole my registration key for Microsoft Office: I will find you!
  You have my word
• This mothers day send the gift of Microsoft Office Word to your mother
• I wonder why Microsoft has opened an office inside my computer. These predatory businesses are getting out of hand.
• My friend promised to give me one of his old Microsoft Office licenses. He gave me his Word.
• Where do Microsoft employees go to work? a Microsoft office.
• What did the programmer say when he bought a Microsoft Office subscription? Hello Word
• If you pirate Microsoft Office You will not Excel.

Microsoft Windows Jokes

Here is a list of funny microsoft windows jokes and even better microsoft windows puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I heard Microsoft tried to change the file path separator in Windows but it received tons of backslash from the community.
  --
  Source: Aaron Peterson, Twitter.
• Did you hear about a house built by Microsoft? What it Excels in is the Outlook from its Windows.
• I heard Putin was installing Windows And Microsoft had to accept his terms and conditions.
• Why did microsoft go straight to windows 10 ? They were trying to keep their german market.
• Got myself a Microsoft advent calendar but I'm worried that once I've opened 3 or 4 windows I won't be able to open any more...
• Why does Mace Windu hate Microsoft? He's had bad experiences with Windows.
• I was walking outside of the Microsoft Store at the mall tonight when my wife asked if I wanted to go in and look at anything. I told her No, I'm just Windows shopping.
• Why is it so drafty in the Microsoft Store? Because it's lined with open windows
  ​
  Saw the other dad joke about the apple store and couldn't resist
• How can you tell something is terribly wrong at Microsoft? Windows hasn't updated in two weeks.
• A Mexican magician works on Microsoft Windows Uno, and *p**...*, DOS is gone without a tres.

Microsoft Excel Jokes

Here is a list of funny microsoft excel jokes and even better microsoft excel puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A lot of Microsoft employees are former incels They call themselves "Microsoft Excels."
• What do you call an Ant who is very good at Microsoft Excel? Excelant
• I really excel at Microsoft puns. You've to take my word for it.
• Overused joke. Hope you like it anyways. Person 1: Do you know how to use Outlook?
  Person 2: As a matter of fact, I Excel at it.
  Person 1: Was that a Microsoft Office pun?
  Person 2: Word.
• I would like to work as a janitor in Microsoft. I could see myself excel in that job.
• ¿Cuál es el programa de Microsoft favorito de Stan Lee? Excel si or no
• We don't use our whole potential Did you know that the average human being only uses 10% of Microsoft Excel?
• Someone stole my microsoft office kit for school I can't excel without it
• Why did the farmer study Microsoft office outside his house? So he could excel in his field.
• I'm not very good at Microsoft office or powerpoint, but when it comes to spreadsheets I Excel.

Microsoft Edge Jokes

Here is a list of funny microsoft edge jokes and even better microsoft edge puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I'm so annoyed at how much Microsoft tries to make me use their browser... It's pushing me to the Edge
• Chrome and Microsoft edge were having an argument when suddenly... Microsoft edge stopped responding
• Why are Microsoft employees never relaxed? Because they're always on Edge.
• I never understood why people hate Internet Explorer and Microsoft Edge so much I am always able to flawlessly download the Firefox Installer using them.
• I'm like Microsoft Edge Nobody likes me, but I'm edgy
• What browser do Linkin Park use? Microsoft Edge
• What you call when you delete Microsoft Edge browser from your computer? Cutting Edge technology!
• I just opened up Microsoft Edge... Now I can download Google Chrome in style.
• There must be flat-earthers at Microsoft. Or why would one call a browser for the worldwide web Edge?
• Everyone says 'Googling' when they Google something, but what do you say when using Microsoft Edge? Edging

Microsoft Teams Jokes

Here is a list of funny microsoft teams jokes and even better microsoft teams puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• If someone on the Windows team at Microsoft gets fired... would you say they've been defenestrated?

Uproarious Microsoft Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time

What funny jokes about microsoft you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean microsoft windows jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make microsoft pranks.