Mic Jokes
65 mic jokes and hilarious mic puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mic that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Do you want to know the best mic jokes? We've gathered the funniest of open mic, drop the mic, boom mic, mic check, mic set, pilot, amplifier, and boombox laughs to make you chuckle. There's something here for everyone, so grab your mic and let's get the show started!
Quick Jump To
Funniest Mic Short Jokes
Short mic jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mic humour may include short pilot jokes also.
- I got booed off stage on open mic night because of my terrible Schwarzenegger impersonation but I'm not gonna let that get to me.... I'll return
- What is the difference between standup comedy, and motivational speaking? Which side of the mic the depressed people are on.
- A Hungarian cockroach was telling terrible jokes at an open mic night. What do you do? Budapest
- A demolition expert goes on stage during open mic night... He proceeds to bring the house down.
- My friend was testing his mic for discord, I told him to get a Scope So he wont have Troubleshooting
- The date is 20 January 2017. The date is 20 January 2017. Donald Trump has just been sworn in as President. He walks to the mic for his inauguration speech. He looks at Obama and says "You're Fired"
- Why did the philanthropist learn how to subtract? Because he wanted to make a difference.
My first original, time for open mic! - You can say what you want about the open-mic hip-hop audience. But, they really don't deserve the bad rap.
- Two sound guys are getting the stage ready for a concert... First sound guy: *Taps on mic:* "Testing, testing one two..."
Other sound guy: *Taps on mic:* "Testing, testing one too..." - What's the difference between Tay Zonday and ASMR videos? Tay moves away from the mic to breathe in.
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Mic One Liners
Which mic one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mic? I can suggest the ones about microphone and open mic.
- Isaac Newton: "Gravity exists" *drops mic*
- What did the new comic say to the mic? Thanks for the feedback.
- You gotta learn to trust your government. *leans into hidden mic* Just like I do!
- What kind of mic did Kurt Cobain use? A shotgun mic!
- What did the cannibal say on open-mic night? Tough crowd.
- What did one fetus say to the other? Guess were wombmates! *drops mic*
- Tumblr. *drops mic, loud burst of feedback*
- If mic is short for microphone... Is bike short for bicrophone?
- How did Gandalf die? From a staph infection *mic drop*
- If I'm so clumsy, explain how I can carry all this recording equipment. *Drops mic*
- Testing 1,2,3..
Is the mic on? - Did you hear about the clumsy MC? He dropped the mic
- Why can't my girlfriend perform at open mic night? Because she's a cover thief.
- If h**... made a Microphone company... ...it'd be called "The Third Mic".
- What's John Lee h**...'s favourite recording device? A Boom Boom mic
Open Mic Jokes
Here is a list of funny open mic jokes and even better open mic puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I asked my dad if he knew what an "open mic night" was... "Yeah" he said "Its got something to do with surgery."
- What did the meteorologist use as his stage name when he rapped at the Open Mic Night? Heavy Drizzle.
- Doing open mic comedy is like Catholic mass. You try to go at least once a week and leave feeling really bad about yourself.
- April Fools' Day is like a huge open mic night in which millions of people go out of their way to demonstrate how unfunny they are.
Mic Drop Jokes
Here is a list of funny mic drop jokes and even better mic drop puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why did Microsoft go straight from Windows 8 to Windows 10? BECAUSE SEVEN ATE NINE
*drops mic* - What do you call a pirate who is all out of reales(Silver coins)? Long Gone Silver...
/drops mic - Heaviest element Scientists discovered something heavier than Uranium, Your mum.
Drop the mic
Mic Set Jokes
Here is a list of funny mic set jokes and even better mic set puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- A band walks on stage, They take their time setting up. The front man speaks into the mic and announces to the audience 'we are The Indian Givers'
Then they all walk straight back off the stage.
Cheerful Fun Mic Jokes for Lovely Laughter
What funny jokes about mic you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean drop the mic jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mic pranks.
I was at a bar one night when I heard the most amazing rendition of Free bird being played. I headed to the stage to find my local magistrate behind the guitar & on the mic. I was so impressed that I hired him to play my wedding, but he insisted on playing his original music which was terrible.
Just goes to show, never book a judge by his cover.
Right after takeoff, a pilot comes on the microphone to welcome his passengers. Thank you for flying with us. The weather is....
Then he suddenly starts screaming while still on the mic, OH MY GOD! IT IS BURNING!!, IT IS BURNING!
Then silence.
A few seconds later, he comes back on and says, I'm terribly sorry about what happened. I spilled some scorching hot coffee on my lap...you should see my pants!!
A voice from the back of the plane yelled, Why don't you come here and see ours?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I give to you a joke I made up when I was seven: Why did the computer c**...?
Because it had a bad driver!
*drops mic*
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A woman is sitting at her husbands f**... listening to the eulogies
She turned to the man next to her and asked if he would say a few words.
Certainly , he says and walks up to the mic
A few words the man says before sitting back down
That's exactly what I needed to hear says the woman.
A man sitting behind her leans forward and asks, Do you mind if I say a word?
Not at all she replies
He stands, walks forward and clears his t**....
Bargain he says before returning to his seat
Thanks , says the woman, that means a great deal
Another man then takes the mic and simply says many .
Thank you, that means a lot says the woman
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So I told a p**... baby joke at an open mic night but I don't think the crowd liked it.
Apparently it was too soon
A flat earther snuck into a physics seminar
While the speaker was giving speech on recent development about gravity, flat earther shouted
" Why do you even think that gravity is real? "
Speaker dropped the mic.
A pilot is flying a plane and shortly after mid-air announcement , forgets to turn off the mic.
He then mentions to his copilot : "I am dating that cute air hostess. After we land , we will go to the hotel and bang. "
The air hostess after hearing this runs towards the front of the plane at full speed to tell the pilot to turn off the mic and hits a blind man's stick and falls down.
The guy sitting on the other side says : "Why are you in such a hurry , we haven't even landed yet! "
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between Biggie Smalls and Charlie Chaplin?
One rocks the mic, while the other mocks the r**....
A boy is making sure a microphone works for an open bar stand up night.
Aa boy, not much older than 12 or 13, comes up to the mic and says
"Ice, ice, icicle".
"Pop, pop, popsicle".
"Test," and the crowd stares in horror as the inevitable is going to happen.
"Test, testing one two three"
An audio technician becomes a comedian
An audio technician is on stage at an open mic night in a comedy club.
He seems to be absolutely crushing the audience with witty and outrageous jokes.
At the end of his time he gets to do a mic drop.
That was the last night he ever did comedy.
The feedback ruined it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
It's quiet...too quiet...
Did you hear about the woman who couldn't find a singing partner?
She had to buy a duet yourself kit...
*-drops mic-*
*-mike jumps up and promptly kicks hatter in the shin-*
Most people would say that Eminem, Jay-Z, or Andre 3000 spit the hardest on the mic...
I personally think it was mia Khalifa.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Took my guitar to an open mic night at a bar. Yea, it s**... cuz they made me play one less chord.
Guess one of 'em was a minor.
I was playing an Online game with a friend....
I was playing an Online game with a friend and he went afk, he came back a few seconds later and over the mic he said "Sorry, that was my wife, she brought me a snack". I said "I really wish I had one of those". My friend said "yeah, having a wife is pretty nifty" to which I replied "No, I was talking about the snack."
*at cash register*
ME: Do I swipe the whole card or...
*[seductively inserts chip]*
Just the tip?
CASHIER: *[into mic]* Security
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do you tell if a girl in Nebraska is a v**...?
She can outrun her brothers...
*mic drop* "I'm out..."
I'm DJ'ing my daughter's 11th bday. As DJ D. A. D. , I need to collect your best dad jokes suitable for the mic!
I'm sure she'll forgive me... eventually.... Hit me!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A guy with a stammer participates in an open Mic night at a pub.
In his opening joke, he makes fun of other people with stammers. A guy from the audience shouts, "You can't make fun of disabilities even if you have one!" The comedian replies, "Did I f-f**... s-s-stutter?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
At the annual s**... donor conference, the president takes the mic and says
Good morning and thank for coming, everyone
I'm disappointed by these wrapping ministries that pop up around this time of year.
Not a single one of them involves a dope beat and a mic to blaze.
