Mexican People Jokes
98 mexican people jokes and hilarious mexican people puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mexican people that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Mexican People Short Jokes
Short mexican people jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mexican people humour may include short mexican family jokes also.
- I don't understand why some people say, "Taco Bell isn't real Mexican." It gets the job done for less than half the cost. That's about as Mexican as it gets.
- I don't know why people say building a wall doesn't work The chinese did it 2000 years ago and they still don't have any mexicans.
- I don't understand how do people steal jobs Like I've never seen a Mexican walking in a restaurant and be like ay gimme the dishes .
- I still don't know why people think Donald Trump's wall would never work. China did it, and they barely have any Mexicans
- If white people are white paper, and black people are black paper. Then what are Mexican people? Construction paper
- Did you hear about the Mexican man who went to the old people home to visit his grandpa? See senior.
- What do Mexican and Black people have in common? Once you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal.
- The Mexican train operator murdered three people yesterday. He told us that the train told him to do it. He had a loco motive.
- What's the same about Mexican and Black people? Once you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal.
- Has anyone here heard of the Mexican train conductor who went crazy and ran over a bunch of people? He had locomotives!
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Mexican People One Liners
Which mexican people one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mexican people? I can suggest the ones about mexican immigrants and mexican american.
- How do you stop a Mexican tank? You shoot the people pushing it.
- Why were there only 1000 people at the Million Mexican March? They only had 2 trucks.
- How did the Mexican greet people in Hawaii? Ahola.
- What do you call a group of Mexicans who hate black people? the que que que
- What do Mexican people use to keep warm? Faheaters.
- How many people will be offended if you tell a Mexican joke? At least Juan...
- What do you call a Mexican Standoff between two people? Juan vs. Juan
- What does a Mexican and a Greek have in common? When people see them they say Hey zeus.
- America is home to the most hard working people in the world: The Mexicans.
- Who are the most religious people? Mexicans, because Jesus is always our cousin.
- Why did the Mexicans only bring 5000 people to the Alamo? They only had two vans
- Do people who go to the gym to "feel the burn" know nothing of Mexican food?
- Why did two Hispanic people drive over someone? Because they Mexi-can.
- I dislike three types of people Racists, hypocrites and mexicans
- What do Mexican people call really upbeat TV shows? CCTV
Mexican People Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about mexican people you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mexicans be like jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mexican people pranks.
So there's a black guy, a white guy, and a Mexican.
They find a genie's lamp, they rub it, and p**... appears the genie! The genie goes to the black guy and asks, "What's your one wish?" The black guy goes, "I wish for me and all my people to be back in Africa, happy and everything." So p**...! His wish is granted. Then, the genie goes to the Mexican and asks, "What's your one wish?" The Mexican goes, "I wish for me and all my people to be in Mexico, happy and everything." So p**...! His wish is granted. Now, the genie goes over to the white guy and asks, "What's your one wish?" and the white guy asks, "You mean to tell me that all the black and Mexican people are out of America?" The genie replies, "Yes." So the white guy goes, "Then I'll have a Coke."
A single car c**... kills a Mexican family.
15 people died.
Two guys are bungee-jumping one day.
The first guy says to the second.
"You know, we could make a lot of money running our own bungee-jumping service in Mexico."
The second guy thinks this is a great idea, so the two pool their money and buy everything they’ll need – a tower, an elastic cord, insurance, etc.
They travel to Mexico and begin to set up on the square.
As they are constructing the tower, a crowd begins to assemble.
Slowly, more and more people gather to watch them at work.
The first guy jumps.
He bounces at the end of the cord, but when he comes back up, the second guy notices that he has a few cuts and scratches.
Unfortunately, the second guy isn’t able catch him, he falls again, bounces and comes back up again.
This time, he is bruised and bleeding.
Again, the second guy misses him.
The first guy falls again and bounces back up.
This time, he comes back pretty messed up – he’s got a couple of broken bones and is almost unconscious.
Luckily, the second guy finally catches him this time and says, "What happened? Was the cord too long?"
The first guy says, "No, the cord was fine, but what the heck is a 'pinata'?"
A Mexican, Texan, a Brit, and a Spaniard are on a plane...
A Mexican, Texan, a Brit, and a Spaniard are on a plane, and suddenly the pilot says, "We are crashing, but I will be able to land if 3 of you somehow get off." The 4 people look at each other, doubting anyone will jump. Then, the Brit jumps out, yelling, "Save the Queen!" The Spaniard then jumps out yelling, "Viva la Vida!" The Texan, in shock of what he saw, is swelling with pride, and yells, "Remember the Alamo!" and throws the Mexican off the plane.
What do white people have in common with the fences they build?
Both get jumped by Mexicans
Racist Lifeguard Jokes
Racist joke time
**How many black people can you fit in a pool?**
Depends, how deep is the pool?
**How many mexicans can you fit in a pool?**
Well I tried to count but the water got too murky.
**How many Russians can you fit in a pool?**
Zero, the pool froze over.
**How many Irishmen can you fit in a pool?**
The real question is how much liquor can you fit in a pool?
**How many North Koreans can you fit in a pool?**
It doesn't matter, they'll never get out.
**How many Israelis can you fit in a pool?**
We lost count. We gave them one pool, and they just took another and another and another...
**How many Sardines can you fit in a pool?**
A lot, you just pack them in like chinese people.
**How many Arabs can you fit in a pool?**
They have water down there?
**How many white people can you fit in a pool?**
Only 1, white people don't share too well.
**How many Germans can you fit in a pool?**
After the first few they just start complaining about each other.
**How many Brazilians can you fit in a pool?**
Wait, how many is a Brazilian again?
**How many Canadians can you fit in a pool?**
I'm sorry, I don't know.
**How many Australians can you fit in a pool?**
Just mind the crocs.
**How many Native Americans can you fit in a pool?**
Depends, do you include burial ground white man build pool over?
All my upvotes to the person who can think up a good cuban version.
An ethnically diverse group of people are doing something…
An African-American, a Mexican-American, Jewish-American, and a white man are walking along the beach in Florida. One of them stumbles over a lamp and as he picks it up, a genie appears. The genie thanks them from freeing him from the lamp and offers them each a wish. The African-American says, "My native land has suffered from all the people stolen away by slavery. I wish for all my people to be returned to Africa to start a new age of African success." As he finishes speaking, p**..., he is gone. The Mexican-American is inspired and says, "My native land has suffered from all the people run out by the cartels and corruption. I wish for all my people to be returned to Mexico to start a new age of Mexican success." As he finishes speaking, p**..., he is gone. The Jewish-American feels the same way and says, "My native land has had my people chased out for thousands of years. I wish for all my people to be returned to Israel to start a new age of Israeli success." As he finishes speaking, p**..., he is gone. The white guy is clearly taken aback with all that has happened. He says, "Let me get this straight, all the black, mexicans, and jews are gone? Lemme get a diet coke."
The Titanic and mayonnaise
What a lot of people don't know about the Titanic was that it was carrying a large shipment of mayonnaise to Mexico. In fact, the Mexican people were overjoyed to be receiving this fine delicacy.
Sadly, as we all know, the Titanic tragically sank, sending its many tons of mayonnaise to the bottom of the ocean. The Mexican people were saddened by this event, and dedicated an annual event to the remembrance of the mayonnaise
We call it Cinco de Mayo
Rocco - Boondock Saints
Theres a mexican, a black guy and a white guy..
a geenie agrees to grant them each one wish..
the mexican asks for all of his people to be happy and in mexico.
so p**..... the wish is granted.
the black guy asks for all of his people to be happy and back in africa.
p**..... the wish is granted.
the geenie finally goes up to the white guy and says, "what will your wish be?"
the white guy says,"you mean to tell me that all of the b**... and mexicans are out of the country?"
the geenie says,"of course! that is what they wished for!"
so the white guy says,"then i guess i will have a coke."
A joke my friends love to hear from me. I hope you enjoy it as well.
A white guy, a black guy, and a Mexican are walking down a beach together and stumble across a magical genie lamp. They rub it and genie comes out and tells them that each of them have one wish. So the Mexican guys say I want all the Mexicans in America to be back in Mexico and happy and rich. So p**... all the Mexicans are gone in Mexico happy and rich. The black guy than says I want all the black people to be back in Africa and happy and rich. So p**... all the black people are back in Africa rich and happy. The white guy has been quiet the whole time and the genie asks him what does he want. The white guy looks at him and says, you're telling me all the Mexicans and black people are out of my country? And the genie responds yes. The white guy pauses and than says I'll have a coke than.
(Sorry it's so long, hope you enjoyed it though)
A mexican guy, a black guy, and a white guy are all walking down a beach when they find a magic lamp...
So they rubbed it and a genie pops out, tells them they get 1 wish each.
The mexican guy goes 1st and says: "I wish that my homeland is rid of all hardships so all my people in the USA can move peacefully back to Mexico." and p**...! The wish is granted.
The black guy goes next and says: "I wish that my homeland is rid of all hardships so all my people in the USA can move peacefully back to Africa." and p**...! The wish is granted.
Last up is the white guy, he asks the genie: "with their wishes, all the Mexicans and b**... are back to their home lands?" The genie replies: "yes, they all are."
The white guy then says: "I'll have a coke please."
Why do black people put their garbage in clear trash bags?
So the Mexicans can window shop.
An American, A Mexican, and an African Man are on an island...
they meet a genie who decides to grant them each one wish. He first turns to the African man."What do you wish for?"
The African man says, "I wish for all of my people to be free and happy in Africa," and so it was done.
The genie turns to the Mexican man and asks, "What do you wish for?"
The Mexican man says, "I wish for all my people to be free and happy in Mexico," and so it was done.
Finally the genei turns to the American and asks, "What do you wish for?"
The American man says, "So let me get this straight. All the black people are in Africa?"
The genie says yes.
"And all the Mexicans are in Mexico?"
The genie again says yes.
The American man smiles and says, "I'll have a coke."
JAKE'S FUNNEH JOKE
On the roof of a very tall building are four men; one is asian, one is mexican, one is black, and the last one is white. The asian walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and jumps off the roof. Next, the mexican walks to the ledge and also says, "This is for all my people" and then he jumps off the roof. Next is the black guy's turn. The black guy walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and then throws the white guy off the roof.
A short collection of jokes....
Teacher: Kids,what does the chicken give you?
Kids: Meat!
Teacher: Very good! Now what does the pig give you?
Kids: Bacon!
Teacher: Great! And what does the fat cow give you?
Kid: homework!!!
My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.
Why is there no mexican olympics? Because everyone who can run, jump, or swim is already across the boarder..
Q: Why do Jewish men get circumcised?
A: Because Jewish women won't touch anything that isn't 10% off.
Boy:say me
Girl:me
Boy: you forgot the d
Girl: there's no d in me
Boy: not yet there isnt :)
One day while in a bank, an old lady asked if i could help her check her balance... so i pushed her over
Failed my biology test today:
They asked, "What is commonly found in cells?"
Apparently "black people" wasnt the correct answer
Enjoy and post some funny ones i can havea laugh at...
Why do black people like basketball so much?
Because it has running, shooting, and stealing. That one always cracks me up!
Why do white people own so many pets?
Because we aren't allowed to own slaves anymore! Haha!
What do you call asians after a nuclear bomb attack?
Rice Krispies! Hahaha!
What can't you play UNO with a mexican?
Because they will always steal the green cards! Hahaha!
Ok, I pretty much made jokes about all the races I could think of, so there, we can all enjoy some laughs while all being offended!
More grandfather jokes.
I've seen a few people posting their grandfather's jokes here recently. Mine is in the hospital right now recovering from heart surgery, so I figured I'd share a few he told me.
There was a Mexican man who was a huge baseball fan. It was his dream in life just to be in the stands at a World Series game. So, he saves up for years, travels to the US, but when he gets there he finds that the game is sold out. He tells his story to a ticket agent, who is sympathetic.
"Here's what I can do for you. I can sneak you in, but the only place you'll be able to sit is on top of the flag pole. I have to warn you, though, the view is awful." The Mexican man agrees, excited at the opportunity to even see the game.
After it ends, the Mexican man goes and finds the ticket agent, and thanks him profusely.
"This has been the best day of my life! Everyone in the stadium was so friendly! Right before the game started, everyone turned to me and asked, Jose, can you see?"
A black man, a mexican, and a white man find a magic lamp
Naturally, a genie comes out.
The genie gives each of them one wish, starting with the black man. He tells the genie "Genie, my people all miss Africa and would like to go back and see it one time. I wish all my people in America were back in Africa." And then the genie sent all the b**... to Africa.
The Mexican says "Genie, I feel the same. My people miss their families and the cooking from Mexico, so I wish all of my people in America went back to Mexico." And then the genie sent all the Mexicans back to Mexico.
The white man thinks for a minute, and asks the genie, "So you're telling me that all the black people and all the Mexican people are out of America?" The genie nods, and the white man says "Oh, I'll just have a Coke then."
A Mexican magician is performing in front of a group of people
He tells the audience that he will disappear on the count of 3. He begins to count up, "uno... dos..."
*p**...*
He disappeared without a tres.
What do you call a house for of black people, with mexicans in the yard?
A coondominium, with a spicket fence.
People must really love this Jesus fellow...
I'm just Mexican.
If people in the US hate mexicans so much..
than why is José in the national anthem
REQUEST: Racist "White" jokes, please.
I know DOZENS of Racist Jokes. But only a couple (not very good) Racist White Jokes.
For example:
Did you hear about the 2 house fire in Mexico?
Thousands died.
Why do Mexican's drive low-riders?
So they can pick strawberries from their car.
A man walks into a Bar with a Parrot on his shoulder.
The Bartender says: "Wow, that's awesome! Where can I get one?"
The Parrot Replies: "Africa! There's millions of them!"
Seriously though: I love Black People.
I think everyone should own one.
How do Asians name their children?
They throw their pots and pans in their air and record the sounds:
Ping Bang Pow.
How do you blindfold an Asian?
With dental floss.
The only "White Joke" I know is:
White people are born purple.
Then turn pink.
When they're mad, they're red.
When they're sick they're green.
When they're scared they're yellow.
When they're cold they're blue.
And have the nerve to call everyone else colored.
So: Does anyone have any "White Jokes" for me?
Why did Mexicans create tequila?
So Ugly people would have a chance at having s**...!
An American & Mexican
are talking.
American: "Your Government needs to spy on your people, man. You guys have a drug problem."
Mexican: "What drug problem? We get drugs pretty easily!"
Why do [Mexicans, Jews, Italians, b**..., Asians, Samoans, Indians, Jews again, etc.] stink?
So blind people can hate 'em too
How would you know if there are mexicans in your neighborhood?
When the black people get car insurance
A Mexican man was visiting America.
He wanted to go to a genuine American baseball game so that when he went home, he could tell his family all about it, but when he got there the game was sold out, so he climbed to the top of the flag pole to get a good look.
"What happened?" asked his family.
"Well, America is the nicest place in the world!" he said. "Before the game started, all the people in the stands, and all the players, stood up, looked at me and said, "Jose, can you see?"
Don't be racist, be like Mario...
He's an Italian plumber created by Japanese people who speaks English, and looks like a Mexican, and runs like a Jamaican, and jumps like a Black man, and grabs coins like a Jew...
What is the real meaning of the American Dream?
When all the black people swim back to Africa with a Mexican under each arm
We all know a Mexican standoff and a Canadian standoff
So an American standoff is when two people are flipping each other off but you know nothing's going to happen.
What do you call a one-ingredient Mexican restaurant for ex-famous people?
"Has Beans Only"
Stonewalls seem to be a continuous problem for minority groups.
Black people had to deal with Stonewall Jackson.
Gay people had to deal with the Stonewall riots.
Mexicans will have to deal with a Stonewall.
What do you call white people pushing a car up a hill?
w**....
What do you call asian people pushing a car up a hill?
Asian power.
What do you call mexicans pushing a car up a hill?
Grand theft auto.
Trump's Wall Won't Matter
People will still find a way to cross the border. There's a reason why they're called Mexicans, not Mexican'ts
There are 3 people on a roof.
They are Asian, American, and Mexican. They each throw off one thing they have the most of. The Asian throws noodles, Mexicans throw off tacos, and the American throws off the Mexican.
A Mexican gets arrested at the US border
When the Immigration officer interrogates him, he asks, "how many people were you travelling with?"
"Only Juan", the Mexican replies.
Donald Trump has fired so many people from the White House...
That he might need to hire Mexicans to fill all of the open job positions.
Black people and Mexican people are so similar...
Once you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal.
Mile High Club
Airplane pilot comes on the intercom and says "folks, to save the lives of the other 127 people on this plane, 3 of you will have to jump."
Everyone looks around and finally a Frenchman stands up and says "in the name of France, I'll jump. Viva la France!" And he jumps out of the plane.
Next minute an Englishman stands up and says "in the name of England, I'll jump. God save the queen!" And he jumps.
Finally, a big guy stands up and says "I'm from Texas. And in the name of Texas..." he walks to the back of the plane, picks up a Mexican, and throws him from the plane. "Remember the Alamo."
Worst part is, poor little guy was Hawaiian.
The cop who said "We only kill Black people" said he was joking
"Mexicans are fair game too."
You know, I agree with Trump about refugees...
...we can't just let all of these Syrians come into America and take all of our Mexican people's jobs!
The Titanic
So, not many people know, back in the 1900's mayonnaise was only made in Europe. The titanic carried 1200 cases scheduled for delivery in the port of Vera Cruz as her next dock after her stop in New York. What would have been the first largest shipment sadly went down with the ship. The Mexicans were so upset over the loss they still celebrate a day of mourning which we know now as sinko de mayo.
If Mexican restaurants have taught me anything
it's that people in Mexico only sleep with their back to a cactus while wearing a forward slanted sombrero.
Most people don't know that back in 1912 Hellmann's mayonnaise was manufactured in England.
In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York.
This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico.
But we all know the tragedy that occurred..
The Mexican people loved mayonnaise so much and this loss was so devastating that they declared a national day of mourning, which happens every year on the day the shipment was supposed to arrive.
This day, of course, is May 5th, or more commonly known as **Sinko de Mayo**
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Texan, and a Mexican are on a plane.
The pilot says, We don't have enough fuel to make it, we will need to push out all of our cargo
The people all push out every last seat and bag that they have, and the pilot regretfully tells them that it is not enough. He says, 3 of you 4 will have to jump out of this plane,
The Englishman says, My country is very noble, thus I shall take my life for you. Long live the queen!
And he jumps.
The Frenchman, not to be outdone by the Englishman yells, Viva la France!
And he jumps.
Finally the Texan goes to the door and yells, Remember the Alamo!
And he throws out the Mexican.
Little Johnny was in Spanish Class one day...
The teacher said, "Okay, class, tell me a sentence that has to do with Nicaragua."
The teacher calls on Mary Lou. "The flag of Nicaragua has white and blue stripes, with a coat of arms in the middle."
The teacher calls on Jason next. "Nicaragua is located in Central America, with 6 other countries."
Lastly, the teacher calls on Little Johnny. "When I saw a Black Mexican on the street yesterday dying of thirst, his brother was constantly pleading people to get that Nicaragua."
Why are mexicans the most outreaching people?
Because they are great at breaking through borders
Mexicans must be really kind, caring people...
...everywhere I go, I hear that Jesus loves me!
Who do Mexican people who love w**... marry??
They Marry Juana
A huge earthquake shook Mexico
Around 3000 people died.
The world combined efforts to help Mexico during these hard times.
England gave medicine.
France sent food.
Germany made huge donations.
USA sent 3000 Mexicans to replenish the stock
Did you hear about the Mexican train engineer that killed a bunch of people?
They said he had a loco motive.
You know what they say about Mexican and black people jokes.
once you heard Juan, you've heard jamal.
People complain that Taco Bell isn't authentic.
But it gets the job done for half the price of other restaurants and nothing is more Mexican than that.
A Texan, a Mexican, a Frenchman, and an Englishmen are on a plane.
The pilot says we only have one parachute, and we're overweight, 3 of you must jump.
The Frenchman steps up first. Viva la France! and he jumps out of the plane.
The Englishman, not wanting to be shown up by a Frenchman, then says Long live the queen! and jumps out of the plane.
Now with just the Texan and the Mexican left, they both approach the door.
The Mexican, nervous and shaking, says I must, for I want people to respect my homeland.
The Texan grabs him by the shoulders and says Remember the Alamo! and shoves him out of the plane.
A young Mexican man named Jose was curious about America so he snuck across the border.
He wanted to go see a baseball game so when he went home, he could tell his family all about it. When he got there, the game was sold out, so he decided to climb to the top of a flag pole to get a better look. When he returned home, his family was anxious to hear about his experience:
"What happened?" asked his family.
"Well, America is the nicest place in the world!!" he said. "Before the game started, all the people in the stands and all the players stood up, looked at me and said, "Jose, can you see?"
Two tapeworms are chilling wherever it is tapeworms chill at.
One of them says, "So I found this host the other day. Man, you should have seen him! Fat as a blimp, ate more food in one day than most people eat in a week. He was roomy and comfy and spent most of his time sitting or laying down, so I didn't even NOTICE the outside world!"
The other says, "Hot d**...! Sounds like a paradise! Then why did you leave? Did he die or something?"
"Nope," answers the first. "But he reaaaaaaally loved Mexican food."
So I did some research...
and Chinese people like listening to music on their phones with earbuds, black people like portable speakers, Mexicans prefer cheaper systems in their home with big speakers and white people like higher end but compact systems...
Sorry, I guess I shouldn't be discussing racial stereo types.
TIL In 1836 a San Antonio pie maker fought with Mexican dairy farmers who tried to serve their pie with a newly developed frozen dairy product. While the pie maker ultimately lost, their valiant struggle is brought to mind any time people declare,
"Remember the à la mode"
Hall pass
My wife is really not too bright. We have this system where we have what's called a "hall pass" where you get to have s**... with any two people in the whole world, as long as your spouse agrees to it.
Now, I picked Angelina Jolie and Christie Brinkley. But my wife, she picked the Mexican guy that mows our lawn and his brother! Out of all the people in the world.
