Mexi Jokes
130 mexi jokes and hilarious mexi puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mexi that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Mexi Short Jokes
Short mexi jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mexi humour may include short burrito jokes also.
- Who's gonna pay for it?! MEXICO!
Who's gonna pay for it?!
MEXIC!
Who's gonna pay for it?!
MEXI!
Who's gonna pay for it?!
MEX!
Who's gonna pay for it?!
ME!!!!
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Mexi One Liners
Which mexi one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mexi? I can suggest the ones about tortilla and taco.
- Who's Going to Pay For the Wall? Mexico
Mexic
Mexi
Mex
Me - The next X-Men movie should be called Mexi-Men
- What do you call a Mexican that can't cross the border? A Mexi*can't*
- What do you call a Mexican who goes on Tumblr? A Mexi-kin.
Hilarious Mexi Jokes for a Fun-Filled Night with Friends
What funny jokes about mexi you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mexi pranks.
My Mexican friend had twin boys and couldn't come up with names..
I suggested Juan and Two
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did only 2 Mexicans cross the border?
The sign said "No Trespassing"
(TRES-Passing)
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What did the mexican get on his SAT's?
Taco crumbs
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two mexicans are stranded in the desert for days....
... and they're at death's door....
They stumble on, hoping for salvation in the form of an oasis or something, they suddenly spy through the heat haze a tree off in the distance.
As they get closer, they can see that the tree is draped with s**... after s**... of bacon. There's smoked bacon, crispy bacon, life-giving juicy nearly- raw bacon, all sorts.
"Hey, Pepe" says the first hombre. "ees a bacon tree!!! We're saved!!!"
"You're right, amigo!" says Pepe.
So Pepe goes on ahead and runs up to the tree salivating at the prospect of food. But as he gets to within five feet of the tree there's the sound of machine gun fire, and he is shot down in a hail of bullets.
His friend quickly drops down on the sand, and calls across to the dying Pepe. "Pepe!! Pepe!! Que pasa hombre?"
With his dying breath Pepe calls out.... "Ugh, run,amigo, run!! ees not a Bacon Tree".......
"ees... a.... Hambush"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why does Mexico never wins any medals at the Olympic Games?
Because everyone who runs, swims, or jump really well is already across the border.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
This one's mainly for Mexicans and Texans.
What did Daniel Boone say to Davey Crocket when thousands of Mexicans charged at them at the Alamo?
"Davey.... are we pouring concrete today??"
Why don't Mexicans have BBQs?
Because the beans keep falling through the grill.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Mexican, a Black guy and a White guy are walking down the beach...
They find a bottle and the Mexican guy decides pick it up and rub it. A genie comes out of the bottle and speaks to them and grants them each one wish.
The Mexican guy goes first and says, "I wish that all my Mexican brethren and I could be transported back to our native homeland and we could all be happy there."
The genie grants his wish and p**..., the Mexican guy disappears.
Now it's the black guy's turn. He says, "I wish that all my African brothers and I could all go back to our motherland and be happy, prosperous and free."
The genie grants his wish and p**..., the Black guy disappears.
Now it's the white guy's turn.
The white guy pauses for a moment, scratches his head and says "Are you telling me that all the b**... and Mexicans are gone from America?
The genie nods his head and says yes.
The white guy makes up his mind and says, "Ok, well i'll have a Coke, thanks."
Mexicans
What's a Mexicans least favorite sport?
Fencing
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many Mexicans does it take to mow the lawn?
Only Juan.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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You know, Mexican and b**... jokes are really starting to bore me.
Once you've heard Juan you've heard Jamal.
A Mexican and a black guy are in a car...
Who's driving?
The cop is...
A Mexican, American and Japanese man are standing on the top of the world's tallest building...
They are told to throw off something their country has a lot of.
The Japanese man goes first: he throws off sushi.
The Mexican then proceeds to throw off tacos.
And then the American pushes the Mexican off.
What did the Mexican say when a gust of wind blew his homework out the window?
Come back essay!
Why did the Mexican man throw his wife out the window?
*Tequila*
What'd the Mexican say when he was upset?
I don't want to taco bout it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Mexican, an Arab, and a r**... girl......
A Mexican, an Arab, and a r**... girl are in the same bar.
When the Mexican finishes his beer, he throws his glass in the air, pulls out his p**..., and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, 'In Mexico , our glasses are so cheap we don't need to drink with the same one twice.'
The Arab, obviously impressed by this, drinks his beer, throws it into the air, pulls out his AK-47, and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, 'In the Arab World, we have so much sand to make glasses that we don't need to drink with the same one twice either.'
The r**... girl, cool as a cucumber, picks up her beer, downs it in one gulp, throws the glass into the air, whips out her 45, and shoots the Mexican and the Arab. Catching her glass, setting it on the bar, and calling for a refill, she says:
'In America we have so many i**... aliens that we don't have to drink with the same ones twice.'
What you get when a Mexican slides down a hill?
A gracias
How does a Mexican build a house?
Juan nail at a time.
How do Mexicans play basketball?
Juan on Juan.
How did the Mexican greet people in Hawaii?
Ahola.
Why did the Mexican push his wife off a cliff?
Tequila.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Mexican once tried to steal my golf clubs..
so I had to shoot a hole-in-juan.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do Mexicans put under their carpet?
UNDERLAY! UNDERLAY!
Why did the Mexican Army only bring 5000 soldiers to the Alamo?
They only had 2 vans
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why does Mexico never get gold medals in olympics?
Because all their swimmers, runners, and high jumpers are in USA.
How many Mexicans does it take to replace a serviceable part of a complex machine?
Just Juan and Emmanuel.
Why has Mexico never won olympic gold?
All those who can run, jump and swim are in Texas.
What does a Mexican wizard use to cast magic?
A Juand
A Mexican Joke
A Mexican man finds a much needed job and asks the owner to hire him. The owner says he'll hire him ONLY if he can come up with a sentence using 3 words of his choice. The words are Green, Pink and Yellow. So the Mexican thinks for a second then replies (read in a Spanish accent) the phone goes Green Green, so I Pink it up and say Yellow?
Jajaja
A Mexican magician says he's going to make himself disappear on the count of three..
He says, uno.. Dos.. And then he vanished without a tres!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Mexican with a r**... e**... walks into a wall. What part hits the wall first?
The lawnmower.
Mexican word of the day: wheelchair
Theirs only 1 taco left, so wheel chair.
A Mexican goes to a Chinese restaurant...
He sits down at his table, and notices a small bottle of black liquid on his table. He picks it up and looks at the label and says, "yes, you are."
What did the Mexican sing to his cheating girlfriend?
♪ I know I'm not the only Juan ♪
I'm Mexican
I'm not offended by taco jokes or fiesta jokes. But Immigration jokes?
They cross the line.
What did the mexican do when he lost his car in the parking lot?
He pressed hispanic button
Why did the Mexican put hot sauce on his taco?
Por flavor
There's a Mexican, An American and a Canadian on a blimp...
The blimp starts falling out of the sky, so the three men start throwing anything they brought that they don't need.
The Canadian says, "there's too many of these in my country," and throws a bunch of hockey sticks out of the blimp.
The Mexican says, "There's too many of these in my country," and throws out his sombrero.
The American says, "There's too many of these in my country,"...
And throws the Mexican off the blimp.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why are there so few Mexican athletes in the Olympics?
Because most of them who can run, jump or swim are already in the United States.
What did the Mexican firefighter name his two sons?
José and Josb
A Mexican magician says that he can disappear on the count of three.
"Uno, dos...", he says before he was suddenly gone.
He disappeared without a tres.
What are Mexican hackers called?
BanDDoS
How do you get a Mexican across the border using only math?
Carry the Juan
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why can't Mexicans bow hunt?
'Cause they don't Habanero!
Why did the Mexican fail English 101?
He wouldn't turn in his essay
A Mexican and a Doctor both build a house.
The houses are exactly the same and stand right next to each other.
After they are done the Mexican tells the doctor: "My house is much more valuable than your house", to which the Doctor replies: "Why should your house be more valuable? They are exactly the same."
"Isn't that obvious? My house is next to a doctors house, while yours is next to a Mexicans house"
I saw a Mexican fighting Jared Fogel
I finally saw Alien vs Predator
Why does Mexico always underperform in the summer olympics?
Because everyone that can run, swim or jump is in USA.
What did the Mexican say when his homework flew out the window?
Where you going essay!?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
These Mexican cannibals accidentally...
These Mexican cannibals accidentally kill a priest for their meal. One of the guys asks the cook "ay, what's for dinner?"
The cook says "tacos al pastor"
What do Mexicans play at their funerals?
Another Juan Bites The Dust
Two mexicans are in a car. Who drives?
The police officer
in mexico, we don't say "I love you"
cause we dont speak english.
How well did the Mexican do for his class test?
He got a borderline pass.
My Mexican friend is so indecisive
He's always on the fence
My Mexican friend was freaking out, but
I couldn't understand his panic.
A Mexican athlete finally got a medal at the Olympics.
The police are still searching for him.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the Mexican fail English class?
Because he refused to turn in his essays
How many Mexicans does it take to run a computer?
Dos
Why couldn't the Mexican be a Firefighter?
Because he didn't know the difference between Jose and Hose B.
A Mexican man was visiting America.
He wanted to go to a genuine American baseball game so that when he went home, he could tell his family all about it, but when he got there the game was sold out, so he climbed to the top of the flag pole to get a good look.
"What happened?" asked his family.
"Well, America is the nicest place in the world!" he said. "Before the game started, all the people in the stands, and all the players, stood up, looked at me and said, "Jose, can you see?"
What do Mexican people use to keep warm?
Faheaters.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I'm Mexican and I think we should go to bed early
Tomorrow we need to wake up early to go build the wall.
Where does a Mexican go when they feel threatened?
Hispanic Room
Why doesn't Mexico have a good Olympic team?
Because everyone who is good at running, jumping, and swimming have already made it into the U.S.
Why did the Mexicans ignore the "No Trespassing" sign?
It was just the two of them.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why cant a Mexican man sleep with three women at once?
Fear of over dos
Mexican self defense
A Mexican passed a Japanese man and a Korean man as they were discussing their favorite type of martial arts.
Japanese man: I practice karate, the defense arts.
Korean man: I practice Taekwondo, teaches defense and attack.
At this point the men notice the Mexican and ask him what he practices
Mexican: Judono
Men: We have heard of Judo but not Judono, what is it?
Mexican: Well, judono if I got a gun, judono if I got a knife...
I know Mexican judo
Judo know if I have a knife.
Judo know if I have a gun.
The Mexican drug lord El Chapo has been extradited to the United States...
It's still unclear which cabinet post he'll be appointed to.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why are there no Mexican teams in the olympics?
If a mexican can run, jump or swim, they're in the US.
There was a mexican magician...
...Who said "On the count of three, I will vanish!"
And so he counted, "Uno... Dos..."
And then he vanished, without a tres.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Mexican attempts to pass the border
A border control officer catches them and says, "Papers."
The Mexican replied, "Scissors."
The border control officer replied,"d**...! Well, you're free to go!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Mexican lying on his death bed
The sick Mexican was lying on his death bed. He had only hours to live when suddenly he smelled tamales. He loved tamales more than anything else in the world, especially his wife's tamales.
With every last bit of energy left in his body, the sick Mexican pulled himself out of bed, across the floor, down the hall, and into the kitchen. He saw that his wife was removing a fresh batch of tamales from the stove top. As he reached for one of the freshly made tamales, his wife smacked him in with a wooden spoon.
"Leave them alone, c**..., they're for the f**...."
What is a Mexicans favorite high school sport?
Cross country
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do Mexicans s**... at playing Uno?
They always keep all the green cards
What did the Mexican hangman serve his victims as a last meal?
Pico de Gallows
Why did the Mexican take a Xanax?
For hispanic attacks
What did one Mexican robber say to the other when they got to the "No Trespassing" sign?
"It's ok because there is only two of us."
Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?
Because all their good runners, jumpers and swimmers are in America
