Metres Jokes

• Short Metres Jokes
• Metres One Liners
• More Metres Jokes

Funniest Metres Short Jokes

Short metres jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The metres humour may include short kilometers jokes also.

1. The Speed of Light is 3*10^8 metres per second. What then is the Speed of Darkness? 100 metres over 9.58 seconds.
2. What do you call a snake that's 3.14 metres long? A "Pi"-thon.
   (brought to you by the bad puns initiative)
3. To all of you who say I'm "obsessed with the metric system" Don't judge me until you've walked 1609 metres in my shoes.
4. I met a gorgeous girl in the bar last night and she promised to show me a good time... So we went outside and she ran 100 metres in 9.69 seconds
5. A programming genius named Sewter Built a limerick-writing computer
   The metre was fine
   And the rhymes quite divine
   But for some reason it always got the last line wrong
6. I come from a mixed race family... My father prefers the 100 metres...and my mother is Pakistani.
7. I hate capitalism, so i always type my messages in lowercase. i also hate racism, and refuse to run 100 metres.
8. My online gf is teaching me the metric system on our first real date… I can't wait to metre
9. I saw a man 3 foot 3 outside my house looking for my utilities readings Turns out he was the metre man
10. A friend of mine called me and said, Come out tonight, and I'll show you a good time. Later, he ran the 100 metres in less than 12 seconds.

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Metres One Liners

Which metres one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with metres? I can suggest the ones about centimeters and meter.

1. I just got a new personal best in the 100 metre sprint! 73 metres.
2. I did my personal best in the 100 metres today.... 74 metres.
3. What snake is 3.14 metres long? A πthon.
4. I saw a snake that was 3.14 metres long I suppose it was a π thon
5. I achieved my personal best in the 100 metres yesterday... 74 metres.
6. What do you call a snake which is 3.14 metres long? A pi-thon
7. I am born to mixed-race parents ...but my mom preferred the 100 metres.
8. I'm really good at fighting.... I won my last fight by 100 metres
9. I know of someone who uses the metric system I really want to metre
10. Where do you take a girl who's 100cm tall on a date? You metre in the park
11. Alligators can grow up to 15 metres... The joke doesn't work with the metric system...
12. What is white and in the Olympic 100 metre track final? The lines.
13. What would you use if you wanted to launch a 90kg projectile over 300 metres? Trebuchet.

Unearthly Funniest Metres Jokes to Tickle Your Sides

What funny jokes about metres you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean litres jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make metres pranks.