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Methods Jokes

39 methods jokes and hilarious methods puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about methods that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

This article provides an exploration into the different methods jokes that specialise in the fields of research methods, maths methods, psychology research methods, lifeforms and specialists. Find out more about the various means used to bring a smile on the face of different specialists!

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Funniest Methods Short Jokes

Short methods jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The methods humour may include short tools jokes also.

  1. My wife and I use the pull-out method for birth control .... we pull out our phones and ignore each other all night.
  2. Good choice. Me: To make a woman laugh is the second best method to get her to sleep with you.
    Her: And what is the best method?
    Me: Chloroform.
    Her: You are funny!
    Me: Good choice.
  3. At school we were always taught the pull-out method doesn't work... ...but like many teenagers, it hasn't stopped the UK trying anyway.
  4. What is the most tried and true method to getting a small fortune? Start out with a large fortune.
  5. The best method of passive aggressiveness is simply to include the person's name at the end of your sentence, Kathy.
  6. If your method of birth control is abstinence... ...and you miss a day, you might be in trouble.
  7. What's a simple method for calculating the number of bees in a beehive? Easy. Just count all their legs and divide by six.
  8. Han and Leia never planned on having a baby. They decided their form of birth control would be the pull-out method. But Han shot first.
  9. My dad rewards me when I earn a good report card, but any C s are punished with unbearable dad-jokes. He likes to call it the carrot and schtick method of parenting.
  10. What's the difference between karate and judo?
    karate is a method of self defense and judo is what bagels are made of.

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Methods One Liners

Which methods one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with methods? I can suggest the ones about ways and helper.

  1. What is Harry Potter's favorite method of getting down a hill? Walking....
    Jk, rolling
  2. What's the dating scene like at MIT? Carbon-14 is the most common method, I believe.
  3. What do you call couples that practice pulling out as a method of contraception? Parents.
  4. What do you call people who use the pull out method? Parents
  5. 5 Execution Methods Still Used In The Modern World Number 1 will shock you
  6. What do you call couples who use the rhythm method for birth control? Parents.
  7. What is the Pope's preferred method of payment? Papal
  8. What is Thor's favorite method of communication? Norse code.
  9. What do you call people whose birth control method is pulling out? Parents
  10. What is a Statistician's preferred method of killing people ? Poisson Distribution
  11. 100% effective method on quitting smoking 1. Start quitting
    2. Quit starting
  12. What do you call a couple using the pull out method? Parents!!
  13. What do you call couples who use the rhythm method? Parents
  14. What method is used to give birth to baby pirate? Sea-section.... Arrrrrgh
  15. What did Method Man say when he got a glass of orangeade? Woo! Tang!

Research Methods Jokes

Here is a list of funny research methods jokes and even better research methods puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • A former vice president has been researching a new method of making music It's called an Algorithm
  • Braces at 22 isn't so bad When I talk to people and they notice my braces I just casually say "I'm researching and method acting a roll for Jaws from James Bond".

Maths Methods Jokes

Here is a list of funny maths methods jokes and even better maths methods puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • A math student invented a new method of making liquor, using electromagnetics to distill alcohol. Proof by induction.
  • What do Atheists cry out during s**...? "Math, oh math!"
    "Scientific method!"
Methods joke, What do Atheists cry out during s**...?

Methods joke, What do Atheists cry out during s**...?

Amusing Methods Jokes to Make You Laugh with Friends

What funny jokes about methods you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean routine jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make methods pranks.

Ending It All

A very old woman realizes that she's seen and done everything and the time has come to depart from this world. After considering various methods of doing away with herself, she decides to shoot herself through the heart.
Not wanting to make a mistake, she phones her doctor and asks him the exact location of the heart. He tells her that the heart is located two inches below the left n**....
The old woman hangs up the phone, takes careful aim and shoots herself in the left knee.

Buzzfeeds top 10 list of t**... methods

Number 7 will shock you

A recent college grad visits a farm one day

A recent college grad visits a farm one day. He approaches the farmer and points to one of the trees.
"You know, with the methods you old farmers use, I'd be surprised if you could get one bushel of apples from that tree" says the college grad.
"I'd be too" the farmer answers. "That's a peach tree."

All this panic buying has led me to using alternative methods for toilet paper...

Last week was tree leaves this week it's lettuce. And that's just the tip of the iceberg!

Many years ago, there was a very lazy fencing duellist

In one of his most notable bouts, against the Marquis of Mod, his opponent noticed a very glaring pattern.
Upon exploiting this weakness and winning the duel, the Marquis approached the lazy duellist and questioned his methods-
"Why, may I ask, do you always seem to attack upon completing your parries?", he asked in a rather bemused fashion.
The lethargic duellist admitted, "It is because I know that riposting requires the least effort"

I don't know why people object to CIA t**... methods.

Who doesn't like to go water boarding?

Scientists are testing new mind reading methods with ants

It sounds like a cool psy-ants project

Aren't some of the methods used to kill people on death row...

...absolutely shocking

Measuring vs Questionaries

Me: To get the mass of each Can of chicken I used a digital scale
Teacher: Why did you use that method to obtain your data as
opposed to the other methods?
Me: Because the cans refused to answer the questionnaires honestly

My wife says I'm obessed with methods of regulation

To prove her wrong I went on a yoga holiday in Prague.
It was a series of checks and balances.

Click here for 17 facts about s**... methods.....

#8 will blow your mind!

I went to a seminar on drilling methods yesterday...

Boring!

Me and my friend were having a nerdy debate over our preferred methods of backing up computer data...

I told him cloud storage was overRAIDed.

Please don't tell me about your methods of increasing drag on your car

It would be a spoiler alert

What do you call a group of people arguing about methods of self-pleasure?

Mass-debaters.

Static methods won't get this

The Town's 90 year old Duan Juan is asked of his seducing methods...

"What's so special 'bout you that makes women 70 years younger than you crave your company, if ye know what I mean?"

"I honestly got no clue young man"-He answered, as he began to
slowly lick his own eyebrows.

I like my women like I like my west-ward settler's food preservation methods.

Meaty & salty

TIL to never do magic tricks to rappers like Wu-Tang Clan.

Apparently they have some pretty Genius Methods for Inspecting your Deck.

Methods joke, TIL to never do magic tricks to rappers like Wu-Tang Clan.