Methanol Jokes

Three guys are drinking methanol. "Quickly, let's finish the bottle, it's getting dark already," one of them observes.

Ivan and Piotr are drinking in a shack out in the woods...

They've been drinking for three days straight and have finally run completely out of booze.
Piotr turns to Ivan and says, "Vanya, go look in the shed out back, see if there's anything to drink there."
Ivan stumbles back with a bottle of methanol in his hand. "Well, we could drink this, but we'd go blind."
Piotr looks around the shack, stares out the window a moment, and says, "I think I've seen enough."

I made a drink called Hit The Road Jack

It's Jack Daniels mixed with methanol.
(Blind jokes are the best kind)

There's a bottle full of methanol in a chemistry lab...

...there's a note attached to it: "don't drink it, or else you will go blind."
The next day, the bottle is half empty and someone added to the note: "I will risk one eye."

I put methanol in the punch bowl...

...and now I can't find the punch line.

A compiler, interpreter, and emulator walk into a bar.

The compiler bought someone else a drink.
The interpreter drank a pint.
The emulator sipped methanol.

Ayn Rand, Rand Paul, and Paul Ryan Walk Into a Bar

They have a few drinks and then die from methanol poisoning due to a lack of government regulation.