Meow Jokes
80 meow jokes and hilarious meow puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about meow that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Meow Short Jokes
Short meow jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The meow humour may include short kitten jokes also.
- A cat walks into a doctor's office A cat walks into a doctor's office. The doctor asks, "What's wrong?"
The cat says, "Me-ow."
The doctor replies, "I know, but where?" - Pet shop Have you got any kittens going cheap? Asked a customer in a pet shop.
No, sir, replied the owner. All our kittens go Meow. - Why should every starter house come with a cat? Because you can't spell homeowner without meow
- I got a new cat yesterday and have decided to name it Brexit He always meows loudly to be let out but when I open the door, he refuses to go through it.
- My friend has tested positive for Covid. She said that she caught it off of her Cat.
Don't ask "Meow." - What has 16 legs and meows? A CATerpillar
- What did the cat say when he fell off the table? "Me-ow."
- How do cats send message across the internet? They e-meow each other
- Apparently a cat has caught Covid Don't ask meow...
- The Cow goes "Moooo". The Cat goes "Meow". The Pig goes "Oink". The Dog goes "Ed-war....do"
(ik it's old but can't help it)
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Meow One Liners
Which meow one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with meow? I can suggest the ones about cat fur and kitty cat.
- First day as a vet Me: What seems to be the problem
Cat: Meow
Me: Yes, but where? - I turned into a cat earlier Don't ask meow
- Accidentally took my cats meds Don't ask meow
- What's it called when a cat meows for food when their bowl is half full? Fake Mews
- I woke up this morning to find that overnight I'd changed into a cat. Don't ask meow...
- I accidentally ate cat food last night. Don't ask meow.
- What will a cat say when it get stuck in a box? LET MEOW!
- I told her she is adopted and…. She just walked away and meowed for food
- I'm slowly turning into a cat. Don't ask meow?
- what do you call a cat in a blender? Meow Mix
- Colleague from work has just texted saying he's caught Covid from his cat. Don't ask meow
- What did the french cat say when it wanted to go outside? Le meow
- Who is the leader of the Kitty Communist Party? Chairman Meow
- What did the injured cat say? Me...ow!
- via a 6 year old - What did the cat say on his cell phone? Can you hear meow?
Cheerful Fun Meow Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor and Joy
What funny jokes about meow you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean cat people jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make meow pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two quick jokes
How do you make a dog go meow? Freeze it in a block of ice an run it through a band-saw... MMMEEEOOOOWWWW!
How do you make a cat go woof? Pour kerosene on it an drop a match... WOOOFF!
Technology has ruined our kids
A group of young children were siting in a circle with their teacher. She was going around in turn asking them all questions.
"Davy, what noise does a cow make? "
"It goes moo. "
"Alice, what noise does a cat make? "
"It goes meow. "
"Jamie, what sound does a lamb make? "
"It goes baaa. "
"Jennifer, what sound does a mouse make? "
"Errr.., it goes.. click! "
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I am an actual real house cat.
After I take a b**...-hit I SWEAR I can type in English for about 60 secmeow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
hwo do you make a dog go "meow"?
Freeze it solid, then oush it through a band saw.
MEEEEEEEOOOOOWW!
What did the cat say to the vet?
Me-Ow......
How do you make a dog meow?
Put it in the freezer for three days. Run it through a bandsaw.
Meoooooow.
A Muslim man went to China...
And went to a nearby Chinese restaurant. He orders his food and, being the faithful Muslim man he is, he wants to make sure that his food isn't pork.
He asks the waiter "Is this pork?" but the waiter doesn't know any English.
So instead he points at his food and says "Oink?"
The waiter quickly shakes his head and says "Meow"
Two Frenchmen attempt to escape a POW camp...
The pair break out of their cells and manage to reach the wire fence in the dead of night. As Pierre scales the fence he stumbles, alerting a nearby guard, who calls out "Who's there?!"
"Meow!" Pierre shouts back, and he manages to creep away.
Now Francois climbs the fence and he stumbles and the guard again called, 'Who goes there?'
"Another cat!"
A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the cops...
They run down an alley and find 3 boxes and decided to hide in each.
The cops arrive to the first box, they kick the first and the brunette shouts
'' Woof Woof!! '' The cops decided it must be dogs and move onto the next box.
'' Meow Meow! '' The redhead exclaims, the cops shrug thinking it is cats and move on to the next box.
'' POTATOES '' yells the blonde.
I told my dog to "Lie."
He said "Meow."
Now I don't know what to do.
What did the ill kitty say to the playful puppy?
"Not right meow, I have a headache."
A blonde, a brunette, and a red head just robbed a bank.
They run into a barn to hide from the cops chasing them. Each of them jumps into an empty burlap sack when the cops come in.
The cops see the bags so they inspect them. The cops shakes the red head's bag. "Woof woof !" Says the red head. So the cops move on, thinking that it's just the farmer's dog.
The cops shake the brunette's bag. "Meow!" Says the brunette. So the cops move on.
The cops approach the third sack and shake the bag. The blonde yells "potatoes!"
Meow
What do you call a cat who watches dirty movies?
A purrvert.
Autocorrect:
Can't live with it, can't live meow it.
What did the cat say when it got hurt?
me-OW!
What do cats do when they join a monastery?
They take a "meow" of silence.
What did the cat say when he lost cell phone reception?
Can you hear me meow?
I'll ^see ^^myself ^^^out
Words that that contain 'meow'
meow, meows, meowing, homeowner
An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman..
..are in the trenches surrounded by the enemy with no way of escaping The Englishman sees three sacks and says right boys follow my lead.
They each get in a sack and as the enemy approaches they poke the bag with their bayonetted.
"Meow meow" says the Englishman.
"Ah it's just some kittens, leave them be were not that cruel. "
They poke the Scotsman.
"Woof woof"
"Ah just puppies leave them be"
Then they poke the Irishman
"Potatoes!"
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the cops...
They duck into an abandoned warehouse, each find a an empty sack, and climb into it.
Cops follow and poke the bag with the brunette. The brunette goes woof! The policeman says, Oh, it's just a bag of dogs, and walks on.
They poke the bag with the redhead. The redhead goes meow! The policeman says, Oh, it's just a bag of cats, and walks on.
They poke the bag with the blonde and the blonde goes Potato. Potato.
What do cat's call Hawaii?
"Meow"
Three boys are hanging around a farm trying to get a glimpse of the farmer's daughter showering.
The farmer notices them and he grabs his shotgun. They run and hide in the barn, each in one sack. The farmer arrives at the barn, and notices the 3 sacks.
He kicks one. From the sack, a sound comes out: Meow!
"Must be a cat." He moves on.
Kicks the second sack: Woof! Woof!!
"Must be a dog." He moves on.
He kicks the third sack: The sack says: "Potatoes!"
What would a cat say if you stepped on its tail?
Me-Ow!
What did the cat say to the statue?
Cat: "Statue bro?"
Statue: "Nah, it's meow"
Three crazys try to escape a mental hospital
Three crazys try to escape a mental hospital when they suddenly notice a guard
Fearing that he might hear his footsteps, the first crazy says meow
The guard thinks it's a cat and doesn't bat an eye
The second guy does the same and the guard again doesn't bat an eye
When it's third guy's turn he says
"I am also a cat"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man is riding through the desert on his horse...…..
.….The rider is like "Man! I'm so hungry I could eat a horse!" Then suddenly the horse goes "Meow!" and starts l**... himself.
A black cat and a white cat falls into the water, what did the black cat said to the white cat?
Meow
"Meow" said the cat. "Bhau" said the dog.
" " said the student in viva.
I'm a bit of a wizard when it comes to talking to animals.
I have a dog called woof. I asked him it's name, and it said woof. I have a cat called meow, because it said meow when I asked her name. And I have a parrot called Whatsyourname.
What did the feline say when it couldn't believe what was happening?
You've cat to be kitten me right meow.
Crush: Why should I trust you? All the guys I've been dating have been dogs.
Me: .........
Crush: Well? Aren't you going to say anything?
Me: ........... meow
They really planned it all along... Cats are destroying the world. Their operation is called:
Apocalypse Meow
How do you make a cat go woof?
Dunk it in spirits and light it on fire.
How do you make a dog go meow?
Run it through a bandsaw.
I ate the cats medication by accident
Don't ask meow.
Bark bark, I'm a dog
Meow meow, I'm a cat
Quack quack, I'm a duck
First first, I'm a YouTube commenter
What do you tell the cat if it scratches you?
"You hurt me-ow!!"
What does a cat say instead when it gets hurt?
Meow
I tried to translate a joke
General ordered soldier to catch a rabbit and make a soup while he is taking a nap. When he woke up he see a bowl of soup on table. Amused General asked soldier how did you catch rabbit in that short time?
Soldier replied I saw a rabbit running around and shot it immediately, it didn't even have a chance to meow
Where does Meowth get his potions?
At the >!apawthecary!<.
I've just had that dreaded call telling me I have to self isolate!
Apparently my roommates cat has Covid 19!
Don't ask Meow
I couldn't remember what the brown rough stuff was on the outside layer of tree trunks...
I asked my cat and she said, "Meow". No help.
I asked my bird and he said, "Tweet". Useless.
I asked my dog and they said "Rhytidome, you buffoon."
A perfect robbery
Three men are being chased by the police after robbing a store
They find a barn and run into quick, where they find 3 barrels
They each jump into a barrel
The police come into the barn and tap on each barrel
On the first barrel the officer taps
He hears "woof woof"
The officer says "it's ok, it's just a dog"
On the second barrel, the officer taps tree times
He hears "meow, meow"
The officer says "it's ok, it's just a cat"
On the third barrel, the officer taps again
This time he hears "PO-TAY-TO"
The officer says "it's just an Irish parrot"
Kevin and Jake had fallen on bad days. Finally, they resorted to theft.
They decided to break into a millionaire's house the following night. Inside the house, Jake accidentally dropped a goblet, which shattered. The noise woke someone up. "Who's there?" the voice demanded. Jake had the presence of mind to reply "meow." After grabbing his fill, Jake slipped out into the darkness, but Kevin was not satisfied. He wanted more. As Kevin searches for more loot, he accidentally knocks a chair over. The voice demanded once again, "Who's there?" "This is another cat," replied Kevin.
We all know humans are just cat's slaves, right? Yes. So a human was looking for a new home, to his cats disapproval. When the human said "I am the owner, I call the shots" how did the cat respond?
You can't spell homeowner without meow.
Getting spiritual at the bar
A guy walks into a bar and notices a framed picture of a cat hanging behind the bar. "What happened to the picture of Buddha you used to have hanging back there?" he asks the bartender. The bartender replies, "That was Zen, this is Meow."
