Mental Illness Jokes
79 mental illness jokes and hilarious mental illness puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mental illness that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Mental Illness Short Jokes
Short mental illness jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mental illness humour may include short mental disorder jokes also.
- Statistics say that 60% of women take medication for mental illness, Which means 40% aren't taking their medication.
- I read that 1 in 5 women suffer from mental illness so I guess that means the other 4 must enjoy it.
- This is a frightening statistic 25% of the women in this country are on medication for mental illness!
That's scary!
It means 75% are running around untreated! - The doctor asked Fred if anyone in the family suffers from mental illness. Fred replied: "No, we all seem to rather enjoy it."
- 25% of all adult women are currently on medication for mental illness which is quite scary.... Because that means 75% are running around untreated.
- My psychiatrist asked me if anyone else suffered from mental illness in my family. I answered " No they all seem to enjoy it"
- My doctor asked me if any of my family members suffered from mental illnesses I said no, they all seem to enjoy it.
- I just read that 25% of women in the United States take medication for mental illness... That's scary! Why do we let 75% of them run around untreated??
- My doctor asked if anyone in my family is suffering from mental illness... I said No, we all seem to enjoy it .
- If you hear a supernatural voice in your head telling you to destroy statues of the Ten Commandments, you might be mentally ill. But if the voice tells you to create them instead, you might be Moses.
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Mental Illness One Liners
Which mental illness one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mental illness? I can suggest the ones about mental health and mentally ill.
- My wife is leaving me because of my mental illness. At least thats what the cat told me.
- What do you call a person who kills cereal? Mentally ill.
- Are you struggling with a mental illness? Or are you really good at it?
- My mother took to me one of those buildings where they take the mentally ill. A church.
- I've lived with a mental illness for 5 years. I'm now single.
- Cats don't cause mental illness, new study finds They're just a symptom of it
- They say mental illness is genetic I know my kids make me crazy
- 1 out of 4 suffer from a mental illness Does this mean that the other 3 *enjoy* it?
- How do you repair a relationship between two mentally ill people? Crazy Glue...
- I have 6 mental illnesses Schizophrenia, OCD, ADHD, dislexia, anxiety, and hypochondria.
- Lobotomy is the solution for all mental illnesses It's a no brainer
- What do you call a mentally ill bike trail? A psyclepath.
- What does a snowman with a mental illness have? Icebergers
- Earworms are mental illnesses. And I'm down with the sickness.
- How do you call mentally ill unwanted baby? Special Ops
Humorous Mental Illness Jokes to Bring Fun and Laughter to Your Life
What funny jokes about mental illness you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mental patient jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mental illness pranks.
One out of every three Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness.
Think of two of your best friends. If they are okay, then it must be you. - the late George Carlin
We need to show compassion for the mentally ill without letting them run for President.
Mental illness is on the increase...
At least that's what the ketchup bottle told me this morning.
Frightening Statistic
This is probably one of the most worrisome statistics to emerge in recent years.
25% of the women in this country are on medication for mental illness.
That's scary.
It means 75% are running around untreated.
What do you call a mentally ill person without arms and legs?
Call him whatever you want, its not like he's gonna get up and do anything about it.
What mental illness does Hank Hill have?
Propanic Depression
Why did the old lady throw the clock outside her window?
SHE WAS MENTALLY ILL!!!!!!
I'm sick of people saying, "Its political correctness gone mad!"
That's offensive. You should say "Its political correctness gone mentally ill".
A mentally ill man visits his doctor
This is a joke I've only heard in Russian, so I did my best to translate it:
A mentally ill man visits his doctor.
While frantically brushing off his arms and torso he says to the physician "You have to help me doc! I'm covered in tiny alligators and crocodiles."
to which the doctor replies "Well then stop throwing them on me!"
What is the recommended psychological treatment for mentally ill statisticians?
Regression therapy
A journalist visits a mental hospital
A journalist visits a mental hospital for reporting and asks the doctor, how do you determine if a patient is mentally ill.
DOCTOR: Well, we first fill a bathtub with water till the top. We then give a teaspoon, a glass cup and a bucket to the patient and ask him/her to empty the bathtub.
JOURNALIST: Obviously a normal person would use the BUCKET because it's bigger.
DOCTOR: No, you're silly! A normal person would pull the DRAIN PLUG! Nurse, admit this in Ward 7!!!
I was disappointed to learn 25% of women are on medication for mental illness
because that means 75% are not
What does the mentally ill Dr. Who travel in?
The RETARDIS
I'm getting really sick of all this hate for Donald Trump.
It isn't nice to make fun of mentally ill people.
I was asked by my doctor if mental illness ran in the family...
I told him "I have an aunt who wants to vote for Hillary Clinton"
According to my mate 3 genders exist.
Female
Male
And mental illness
Did you hear about a mentally ill Mexican?
He has Borderline Personality Disorder
I saw an alarming stat the other day. Apparently 25% of women are taking medication for some sort of mental illness . . .
That means that 75% of women are walking around unmedicated!
Americans are the best when it comes to taking care of their mentally ill.
..they make them their President.
Did you know the original programmer of Oregon Trail was beaten to death by mentally ill Discworld fan?
He died of dissin' Terry.
If you suffer from mental illness, it always helps to remember you are not alone.
Unless the mental illness is schizophrenia
Some people think LGBT is a mental illness.
So, it makes sense that they're called straight jackets.
In Germany it's common for mentally ill patients to be committed to least ten different facilities.
They're in-zehn asylums.
Person 1: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Person 2: Why did it?
Person 1: Because he wanted to visit his friend, who is mentally ill.
Person 2: Oh how sad
Person 1: Ok then. Knock Knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: The chicken
My grandmother, a life-long abstract artist, has dementia.
For the longest the family couldn't be sure of her mental illness, but eventually we all saw the landscape.
So it turns out stupidity can be considered a form of mental illness...
Guess who just got disability benefits.. SUCKERS!
The mentally ill are scary
They are constantly following me.
My doctor asked me, "Do you have a history of mental illness?"
"Yes," I told him, "I got it from the library. Why, do you want to borrow it?"
what do you call a mentally ill parent that's easy to read?
transparent
What do you do when a super famous black music artist pushes to get mental illness patients out of jail and into treatment?
Make fun of his self-admitted mental illness.
What is the difference between a muslim t**... and a christian t**...?
One is muslim and the other is mentally ill.
They did surgery on a grape.
It blew up instagram but when they did it on my mentally ill brother. "They did surgery on a vegetable" did not blow up on instagram
What do s**... b**... and Dr Phil patients have in common?
Both blow up because of mental illnesses.
What mental illness do Australians have?
Taz-mania
Some r**... say there are 76 genders, some normal people say there are 2 genders, some intellects say there is only 1 gender.
But I think there are 3 genders
1. Male
2. Female
3. Mental Illness
A young boy named Jim with suspected mental illness was due to visit a psychotherapist but he seemed very uncomfortable with the whole idea. Finally his mother convinced him to go. Upon arrival the young boy was greeted Hello Jim, do you know who I am? ...
Jim replied.. Of course I do, your Psycho The r**...!
If I was in a room with h**..., o**... bin laden and stalin,
I would ask you to write a letter to my mother about my mental illness
Doctor: "Does anybody in your family suffer from mental illness?"
Me: "No... so far as I can tell, they seem to enjoy it."
My wife and I have been plagued by birds chirping outside our window at night, and it's upsetting her
She asks me "What kind of bird chirps at night?! Isn't that a morning thing?!"
I tell her "Well, the bird likes to chirp at all hours, and is obviously mentally ill or crazy, so it can only be one kind..."
"What's that?"
"A *cuckoo* bird!"
"......."
I don't think I've ever seen her roll her eyes that hard at anything I've ever said. (Borat thumbs) GREAT SUCCESS!
