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Melting Ice Jokes

54 melting ice jokes and hilarious melting ice puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about melting ice that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Melting Ice Short Jokes

Short melting ice jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The melting ice humour may include short melted ice cream jokes also.

  1. I just melted an ice cube by staring at it. Took a bit longer than I thought it would, though.
  2. Why did the snowman invite the sun to the winter solstice party? To melt the ice and break the ice!
  3. Why do hockey rinks have rounded corners? Because if they were 90 degrees, the ice would melt.
  4. An ice cube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. Bunsen... My flame...I melt whenever I see you," confessed the ice cube.
    * Chill, it's just a phase you're going through. *
  5. It's strange that we don't hear more concern from the flat earthers about Antarctica melting You'd think they would be worried about the ice wall springing a leak and draining the ocean.
  6. They say that if enough Antarctic ice melts more and more viruses will emerge... I guess that means COVID is only the tip of the iceberg!
  7. Went ice fishing yesterday. Caught over a hundred pounds... Unfortunately most of it melted by the time I got home.
  8. An ice cube decided to wear a new hat A nice man saw this, and said to the ice cube: "Looking solid, dude!"
    The ice cube absolutely melted at this sweet compliment.
    Now he's looking liquid, dude.
  9. Once this whole "global warming thing" melts the ice caps We're gonna have a canoe world order.
  10. I just realized I have a superpower I can melt ice cubes just by staring at them.
    It takes a while though.

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Melting Ice One Liners

Which melting ice one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with melting ice? I can suggest the ones about icicle and water freezes.

  1. Ice Cube is 48 years old, but still hasn't melted. Do you know why? Man's not hot.
  2. How to make an ice cube melt faster? Talk to it and get into a heated argument
  3. Why don't people like talking about the melting sea ice? It's a polarizing issue.
  4. Have you ever seen a baby dragon eating ice cream? It'll melt your heart.
  5. Love is like an ice cream girl so eat it before it melts.
  6. Why did Club Penguin shut down? The Republicans melted the ice caps.
  7. what do you call the god of melting ice? Thaw.
  8. What's Ice Cubes least favorite sandwich? A melt
  9. If I melt dry ice Can I swim without getting wet?
  10. Why are the polar ice caps melting Because polar bears are a hot animal
  11. What did the melting ice cube say to the gherkin? Water pickle
  12. Why'd the little girls ice-cream melt? She was on fire.
  13. Proof that Bush did 7/11 Jet fuel cant melt ICEE's
  14. I had the best ice cube It's like it could melt in my mouth
  15. What did water say when ice f**...? Ice melt it.

Hilarious Fun Melting Ice Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about melting ice you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean iceberg jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make melting ice pranks.

A family of tortoises went into a cafe for some ice cream.


They sat down and were about to start when Father Tortoise said, "I think it's going to rain. Junior, will you pop home and fetch my umbrella?"
So off went junior for Father's umbrella, but three days later he still hadn't returned.
"I think, dear," said Mother Tortoise to Father Tortoise, "that we had better eat junior's ice cream before it melts."
And a voice from the door said, "If you do that I won't go."

Penguin Joke (kinda dirty)

One day there was a penguin driving in his car on a hot day. He is driving along when his car breaks down. He has his car towed to a mechanic who tells him that it might be a while to find out what's wrong with his car.
The penguin is getting impatient and it is really hot out. He sees an ice cream shop across the street so he goes over and gets and ice cream cone to cool off. He walks back to the mechanic eating his ice cream which melts and gets all over his face.
He asks the mechanic "did you find out what was wrong with my car." The mechanic looks up at him and says "looks like you blew a seal." The penguin wipes off his face and says "Nope, just ice cream."

i said my power steering pump blew a seal and my uncle came back with this

So a penguin is driving in the desert and his car brakes down, so he takes it to the mechanic. while hes waiting for the mechanic he goes and gets ice cream since its hot in the desert it melts so he goes back to the mechanic and the mechanic says well it looks like you blew a seal

So a penguin and a seal are in a car...

The penguin is driving. It's 105 degrees outside, and, being from the arctic, they want to get something to cool off. The seal suggests they get ice cream, so they find a nearby ice cream parlor. They're getting out of the car and the seal says, "Hey, something's wrong with the engine!" the penguin looks underneath the car, and sure enough there is a puddle of oil forming under the hot engine. Fortunately, they see a service station across the street. So, fighting the heat, they push the car to the shop and ask the mechanic to look at it while they go eat. By this time, the penguin and the seal are about ready to melt, so the penguin orders a huge bowl of ice cream. Unfortunately, he realizes that he cannot use a spoon. Abandoning all composure, the penguin buries his face in the ice cream, getting it all over himself. Meanwhile, the seal enjoys a shrimp basket. Finally, the two finish and go back to the mechanic. "Well," he says from under the hood, "it looks like you just blew a seal."
"Nope," replied the penguin, still wiping his face. "Just ice cream."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

A penguin is on a road trip and his car breaks down

He pulls off to the nearest mechanic to get it looked at, and the mechanic tells him it's gonna be about an hour before he knows anything. So the penguin decides to walk a couple blocks to a shopping center.
It's really hot in this place and the penguin's not used to that at all, so he starts looking for ways to cool off. He sees a Baskin Robbins and decides to go in and get himself an ice cream cone. He goes outside and sits down to enjoy it, and it's delicious. The heat starts to melt it and he gets ice cream all over himself, but he doesn't care because it's cold and reminds him of home. He's happy as can be, just l**... away and making a total mess of himself, until the cone is gone and he realizes it's almost time to get his car back.
So he goes back to the mechanic, the guy has just finished up and the penguin asks, "Well, what was the problem?" The mechanic replies "It looks like you just blew a seal."
The penguin is shocked and cries, "No it's just ice cream, I swear!"

A penguin takes a road trip

A penguin decided to take a road trip. Halfway through, his car breaks down and he gets it towed to the nearest mechanic. The mechanic tells him it will take about 20 minutes to diagnose the problem, so the penguin decides to walk around a bit and check out the small town. It's hot out, and being a penguin, he's used to cooler weather, so he stops and buys himself a huge ice cream cone. He's eating the ice cream as fast as he can as he's walking around, but it's hot out, and a lot of it melted all over his hands and face. 20 minutes go by, and he heads back to the mechanic. When he gets there, the mechanic says "Well, it looks like you blew a seal", and the penguin says "Nah, man, that's just some ice cream"

A penguin is driving along in his convertible on a very hot day...

when it suddenly breaks down. He has it towed to a shop where the mechanic says it will be at least a couple hours while he finds the problem. The mechanic tells the penguin that he can go to a nearby diner to get out of the brutal heat.
The penguin goes into the diner and decides to order a bowl of ice cream to cool off. He dives right in and makes a real mess of himself. He orders another bowl and eats it so fast he's wearing most of it. There's melted ice cream all over his face.
Finally, the penguin pays his bill and heads back to the shop. The mechanic looks up from the penguin's car and says, "It looks like you blew a seal!" The pengiun says, "Nah, it's just ice cream."

A penguin is driving down a desert road...

when his car begins to sputter. He pulls over into a service station and leaves his car with the mechanic. The penguin goes into a nearby ice cream shop and buys a vanilla ice cream cone to try and beat the heat. It's so hot outside that the ice cream begins to melt all over his hands and face as he eats it, leaving a mess. When he's finished his ice cream, he goes back to the service station to check on his car. The mechanic tells him "All fixed. Looks like you just blew a seal". The penguin replies, "No, it's just ice cream".

A penguin is driving through the desert

The car begins to lurch and smoke pours from the hood. The penguin stops at a small gas station on the side of the otherwise desolate road. Luckily, a mechanic is available. "Give me a few minutes and I'll let you know what I find out" he tells the stranded penguin. So the penguin heads inside the gas station's market and buys an ice cream. He steps outside to eat it. The hot desert sun begins to melt the ice cream faster than the penguin can consume it. It makes a mess. The mechanic returns to the penguin, looks at him, and says "well, it looks like you blew a seal." The penguin responds "oh no, that's just ice cream."

A penguin is driving through town on a hot summer day.

Unfortunately, his car breaks down and he's forced to take it to a mechanic. The mechanic says "I'll have a look, just go do something for a bit and come back. I'll let you know what I find when you get back."
So, with some time to kill the penguin goes across the road to get some ice cream. Due to the heat, the ice cream melts fast while the penguin tries to eat it. He makes an awful mess, all over his flappers and beak.
He goes back to the mechanic when he's done his ice cream and the mechanic says "Looks like you just a blew a seal"
"Oh no I was just eating some ice cream"

I called my repairman to complain about a faulty icemaker that had been leaking ...

When he came back out to the house, he discovered it was just some ice that had fallen and melted on the floor. I offered my apologies for the mistake. The repairman told me not to worry, as far as he was concerned, it was water under the fridge.

#truestories #homegrownjokes

Two people are having lunch.
Person One: This water tastes strange.
Person Two: Like what?
Person One: Like melted ice.
A true story.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

The polar ice caps just melted and The Netherlands got fully submerged

Now they're called The m**... Trench

I pulled up to the drive-thru of a fast-food restaurant and ordered coffee.

I asked the clerk to put some ice cubes into the cup so that I could drink the cool coffee quickly.
At the window, there was a delay.
Finally, a teen-aged girl came to the window looking frustrated.
"I'm having a problem," she announced. "The ice keeps melting."