Meditate Jokes
32 meditate jokes and hilarious meditate puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about meditate that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Meditate Short Jokes
Short meditate jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The meditate humour may include short meditation jokes also.
- I've decided to take up meditation.. ..at least it's better than sitting and doing nothing.
- Why did the accordionist take up meditation? He wanted to find the right key to inner peace.
- Maybe the ChatGPT servers are just taking a break to meditate and clear their electronic minds.
- What does the Freudian monk chant while meditating? MOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!
(Sorry if repost, I just thought of this, but I can't be the first) - A man hiking in the Himalayas comes across a sadhu meditating. He says the sadhu, "there is a blizzard coming aren't you going to go back to town?" The sadhu responds Nah I'ma stay
- Wiping with only one square of toilet paper is a meditative experience.... You really get in touch with your inner self.
- While climbing barefoot up mountains to meditate, Ghandi would squeeze garlic into his mouth to deal with hunger pains from fasting super calloused fragile mystic with extra halitosis
- After visiting the US, a Tibetan monk made the mistake of meditating on his flight home. He transcended to another plane and ended up in Albuquerque.
- I'm writing a book to help surgeons to use Eastern meditation to overcome anxiety in the operating theatre... I'm going to call it *The Calmer Suture.*
- What did the cop say to the man who was meditating and saying "ohmmmmmmmmmmm"? Stop Resisting!
Share These Meditate Jokes With Friends
Meditate One Liners
Which meditate one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with meditate? I can suggest the ones about relax and remain calm.
- What do you call a wolf that meditates Aware wolf
- How is a meditating monk and a fiber-optic cable similar? Total internal reflection.
- What do you call a Buddhist monk who meditates in the snow? Fro-zen.
- Why do green beans meditate? To find inner peas!
- I taught my pet wolf to meditate. Now he's aware wolf.
- What sound does a blonde white girl make while meditating? "Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm?"
- What does an electrician say while meditating? Ohm... Ohm...
- I'm going to start meditating. Beats sitting around and doing nothing all the time.
- Why do Buddhists meditate in front of mirrors? For optimal self reflection
- Why does the yogi always meditate under the citrus tree? It's a sublime spot
- Did you hear about the yoga instructor who kill his instructor? It was pre-meditated.
- What did the physics teacher say when meditating? "Ohmmmmmmmm"
- Why do people who meditate say 'ohm'? They're resisting temptation
- Three Buddhists walks into a Meditative state . Om
- "How do you perform mediation?" "Meditation? Uuuummmmmmm........"
Amusing Meditate Jokes to Make You Laugh with Friends
What funny jokes about meditate you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean yoga jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make meditate pranks.
I'm a 21-year-old multimillionaire. Here's how I did it.
1. I get up at 5:00 AM every day
2. I run for an hour before breakfast
3. Afterward, I take a cold shower to wake me up.
4. Journaling is key. You never know when you might need to remember something.
5. Always write down an appointment as soon as you get it.
6. My dad owns a Fortune 500 company.
7. I meditate every day
Ray has just reached his 110th birthday. A reporter comes to his birthday party and says, Excuse me, sir, but how did you come to be so old? Ray replies, It's easy. The secret is never to argue with anyone.
The reporter is not impressed. That's insane! he says. It has to be something else – diet, meditation, or 'something.' Just not arguing won't keep you alive for 110 years! Ray looks at the reporter and says, Y'know, maybe you're right.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If you do these things every day for 30 days straight you will be unrecognizable
1. Sleep 8+ hours everyday.
2. Drink four 8oz glasses of water minimum daily.
3. Get outside in the sun everyday.
4. No sugar.
5. Read for 30 mins each day.
6. Workout for 1hr 3 times a week
7. Capture someone, cut their face off then sew it onto your face.
8. Meditate for 10 mins everyday.
