Medical Students Jokes
26 medical students jokes and hilarious medical students puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about medical students that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Medical Students Short Jokes
Short medical students jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The medical students humour may include short medical school jokes also.
- Two medical students are about to witness an autopsy for the first time... One asks the other, "What do you think it'll be like?"
The other student shrugs and says, "Remains to be seen". - What a doctor must have. I asked a medical student once, what he thought would be the one thing that makes a doctor who they are.
He responded with: "A doctor must have patients". - What do you call it when a medical student is exploring the different types of practices they are interested in? A field trip
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Medical Students One Liners
Which medical students one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with medical students? I can suggest the ones about med school and nursing student.
- Where do college students go for medical attention? An I.V. League.
- What did the blonde medical student die from? An aneurysm.
- The more medical students I met, the less I trust doctors.
- Why couldn't the Asian student graduate medical school? "Knee-How?"
- Why did the medical students feel symptoms of vertigo? They did lots of rotations.
Share Hilarious Medical Students Jokes and Enjoy Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about medical students you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean students related jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make medical students pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class when a pre-med student interrupted him.
Why do we have to learn this stuff?" The young man blurted out.
"To save lives," the professor responded before continuing the lecture.
A few minutes later the student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?"
The professor stared at the student for a long time. "Physics saves lives," he said, "because it keeps the idiots out of medical school."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept.
A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask "Why do we have to learn this stuff?"
"To save lives." The professor responded quickly and continued the lecture.
A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted.
"It keeps the ignoramuses out of medical school," replied the professor.
A member of the family in a London medical college was appointed an honorary physician to the king.
He proudly wrote a notice on the blackboard in his class-room room : " Professor Jennings informs his students that he has been appointed honorary physician to His Majesty, King George."
When he returned to the class-room in the afternoon he found written below his notice this line :
" God save the King."
It's irritating when students get ahead of themselves...
These days many college students assume that they're doing the job already. That's not how it works, you need to get the certification, or get the job.
Engineering students shouldn't call themselves engineers
Medical students shouldn't call themselves doctors
Law students shouldn't call themselves lawyers
Business school students shouldn't call themselves minions
And Art students certainly shouldn't call themselves baristas or waiters...
A medical student
A medical student walks into his favorite local bar and orders a beer. "I've finally decided what my practice will specialize in," the student tells the bartender. "It will be in the study and treatment of the diseases and disorders of the Adam's apple." "Is there some sort of fancy medical name for that specialty?" the bartender asks. "Yes," the student replies. "I'll be a guyneckologist."
A professor gives an IT student, a law student and a medical student a phone book to memorize
The IT student creates a program that does it for him, the law student asks whether the assignment is legal and the medical student asks „When is it due?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A medical student is driving home on a narrow country road in the middle of the night after his shift in the hospital.
The weather is terrible.
It's raining cats and dogs.
Suddenly a motorbike is screaming by with very high speed.
"Jesus Crhist! What an idiot! He will c**... if he doesn't slow down!"
A few minutes later he spotted in his headlights on the side of the road the torn up motorbike against a big tree.
He stopped and quickly jumped out of his car to see in he can give first aid.
But it's to late.
The biker is already dead.
He looked around if there is anyone around. Nobody to see.
The student thouhgt "This is the oppertunity to finally obtain a real human eye!"
He always carryrna spoon and a glass eye in his pocket for an opperunity like this.
He quickly removes the left eye and places the glass eye in the socket.
One quick look around and he jumps in his car and races off.
The next morning when he wakes up he turned on the tv and watches the news.
It said: "Biker found dead on country road with 2 glass eyes."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An medical forensics professor was giving an introductory lecture to a class of students.
Standing over a corpse, he addressed the class. There are two things you need to make a career in medical forensics. First, you must have no fear. Having said that, he shoved his finger up the corpse's a**..., withdrew it, then licked his finger. Now you must do the same, he told the class. After a couple of minutes of uneasy silence, the class did as instructed.
Second, the professor continued, you must have an acute sense of observation. For instance, how many of you noticed that I put my middle finger up this man's a**..., but licked my index finger?
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Dads favorite medical school joke.
Medical students were attending their 1st biochemistry class. They all gathered around the Lab table with a u**... sample. The professor dip his finger in u**... & tasted it in his own mouth. Then he asked the students to do the same. The students hesitated for several minutes, but at last every one dipped their finger in u**... sample & tasted it.... When everyone finished, the professor looked at them & said: The most important quality is 'Observation'. I dipped my MIDDLE Finger but tasted the INDEX Finger. Today you just learn, how to pay attention.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class
A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class when a pre-med student interrupted him."Why do we have to learn this stuff?" the frustrated student blurted out."To save lives," the professor responded before continuing the lecture.A few minutes later the student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?"The professor stared at the student without saying a word. "Physics saves lives," he finally continued, "because it keeps the idiots out of medical school."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A college professor had just finished explaining an important research project to the class
He emphasized that this paper was an absolute requirement for passing the class, and that there would be only two acceptable excuses for being late. Those were a medically certifiable illness or a death in the student's immediate family.
A prankster student in the back of the classroom waved his hand and spoke up, "But what about extreme s**... exhaustion, professor?"
As you would expect the class exploded in laughter.
When the students had finally settled down, the professor froze the young man with a glaring look.
"Well," he responded, "I guess you'll have to learn how to write with your other hand then..."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A father and her disappointing daughter
So there's a girl, who just graduated from High School as an honors student but just a few A's away from making Valedictorian. After her graduation, her father walks up to her and says "you've let me down."
The girl goes to medical school. Once again, she graduates near the top of her class but isn't the top of her class. The father walks up to her and says "you've let me down."
The girl was nominated for a big promotion in her hospital but was just a few marks away from securing it. Her father walks up to her and says "you've let me down."
Years pass. The woman has grown to hate her father. One day, she receives a letter saying her father had passed away. Forgetting all of her hate, she gets on the next flight to her mother's home.
As soon as she arrives, her mother hands her a letter detailing one final request from her father.
"At my f**..., I would like to have my daughter lower my body into my grave so she can let me down one more time."
Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart.
He was stiff-legged and walking slowly.
One student said to his friend: "I'm sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that."
The other student says: "No, I don't think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki Syndrome. He walks slowly and his legs are apart, just as we learned in class."
Since they couldn't agree they decided to ask the old man.
They approached him and one of the students said to him, "We're medical students and couldn't help but notice the way you walk, but we couldn't agree on the syndrome you might have. Could you tell us what it is?"
The old man said, "I'll tell you, but first you tell me what you two fine medical students think."
The first student said, "I think it's Peltry Syndrome."
The old man said, "You thought - but you are wrong."
The other student said, "I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome."
The old man said, "You thought - but you are wrong."
So they asked him, "Well, old timer, what do you have?"
The old man said, "I thought it was gas - but I was wrong, too!"