Medical Procedure Jokes
14 medical procedure jokes and hilarious medical procedure puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about medical procedure that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Medical Procedure Short Jokes
Short medical procedure jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The medical procedure humour may include short surgery jokes also.
- Today I learned about Harvey E. Brown, a civil war surgeon who had so many amputations he ran out of fake legs and had to use a shovel. It was a ground-breaking medical procedure.
- BREAKING NEWS: The leader of North Korea, Kim Jong-un, is brain-dead following an invasive medical procedure. Officials praise the regime for finding common grounds with the US.
- Did you know there's only one medical procedure where you *have* to leave a tip? Circumcision.
- What medical procedure involves transgender gang members uniting as one? A blood transfusion
- How is a vote for Hillary Clinton like a lobotomy? One means your brain will never function fully and one is a medical procedure.
- What is the name of the medical procedure for female to male gender change? An Addadicktomy
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Medical Procedure One Liners
Which medical procedure one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with medical procedure? I can suggest the ones about procedure and medical examination.
- What's the medical term for a trans / s**... change procedure? Adadictomy.
Entertaining Medical Procedure Jokes to Laugh Out Loud Fun with Everyone
What funny jokes about medical procedure you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean circumcision procedure jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make medical procedure pranks.
An American patriot with amputated arms decides to replace them.
He obtains a pair of grizzly bear arms from a black market, and attaches them on his own, with the help of a friend.
He is arrested for contribution to animal cruelty and performing medical procedures unlicensed.
When taken to court, he gives a speech defending his right to bear arms.
Medical science has come a long way.
There's a tribe in Africa whose exposure to chemical runoff in the water from local mines created birth defects. One out of every three children are born with no eyelids. Volunteer doctors created a procedure where they take the f**... from new born males and create eyelids for those born without them. The procedure has been highly successful, although the children do look a little cockeyed.
People always get mad when someone thanks god instead of the doctor, after the doctor saves their life in some complicated procedure...
But if I knew I was going to have 10 years of medical debt, I wouldn't thank the person that saved me either.
A medic, an architect and a programmer are talking about who's job is the oldest.
A medic, an architect and a programmer are talking about who's job is the oldest.
The medic says: "My job is the oldest because when God made Eve from Adams rib, that was a medical procedure."
The architect says: "Hold up! Before Adam and Eve, God created the universe. That's an architects job - to make something out of chaos."
The programmer then says: "Now wait a minute, who do you think was responsible for all the chaos?"
Cutting-edge medical procedure
A new father was overjoyed to learn that his wife had just given birth to their first child: a son. However, the doctors informed the couple that their baby boy suffered from a rare but serious birth defect: the child had no eyelids. He had been born perfectly healthy in every other way, but lacked eyelids.
"All hope is not lost, however," the chief resident said. "The muscles and connective tissue appear to be normal, he just lacks the mucous membrane. If we circumcise your little one, we should be able to graft that tissue onto the place where his eyelids should be, and he can live a relatively normal life."
"Ok," the father said after discussing it with his wife,"go ahead and see what you can do for him."
The operation was a resounding success; the baby was blinking normally within a week.
The only problem was that the child ultimately grew up to be c**...-eyed.
A s**...-reassignment specialist is trying to simplify the names of surgical procedures...
He takes his nurse aside and explains "Lots of people come in here and get confused and intimidated by the medical jargon we use to explain the operations. From now on I want you to call male-to-female procedures "misterectomies".
The nurse is somewhat perturbed, but the specialist reassures her, saying all the doctors are doing it but they're still working out standardized names.
Just then a patient walks up looking a little embarrassed. The specialist asks her what's wrong, and she says she's been referred to him by another doctor for a procedure. The specialist guides her to a chair and asks her for clarification.
The woman blushes and stammers "I'm not sure if I'm saying this right, but I'm here for my addadictome."
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(If you don't get it, try reading it out loud).
*edited for clarity*