The Best 42 Mechanics Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Mechanics jokes. There are some mechanics electricians jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these mechanics fixes puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Mechanics Jokes and Puns
What does E. Honda have in common with all other Hondas?
They rely on cheap mechanics
A penguin is driving....
down the street when his car starts sputtering. He pulls into the next mechanics shop and asks him to take a look. mechanic says it will be about an hour. While waiting the penguin decides to go next door to the malt shop and get an ice cream cone. an hour later the penguin goes back to the mechanic.
the mechanic looks at him and says "looks like you blew a seal".
"oh no I just had some ice cream" said the penguin wiping his face.
Two quantum mechanics professors had sex
They must have had physical chemistry.
Two mechanics are talking, and one says to the other "Hey, I found this car part in the dump, I think it might be from an old limo."
The other mechanic inspects the part and replies, "Eh, I dunno, that might be a bit of a stretch."
Relativity theory
In classical (Newtonian) physics, we can't solve the three-body problem. In the theory of relativity, we can't solve the two-body problem. In quantum mechanics, we can't solve the one-body problem, and with quantum electro dynamics, we don't even understand the vacuum anymore.
Are you afraid of quantum mechanics ?
Dont worry, it's gonna be Feynman.
Why do babies make bad mechanics?
They have poorly developed motor skills.
Little Johnny calls for his mom
"MOM! MOM!"
"What is it Johnny?"
"Does Grandma know anything about car mechanics?"
"No, why?"
"She's outside, under a bus"
What kind of Mechanics fix and break your car at the same time?
Quantum Mechanics.
A biologist, a chemist and a physicist are at the beach.
The biologist is enthralled by the biodiversity of the ocean and walks into the sea, never to be seen again.
The physicist is enthralled by the complexity of fluid mechanics and walks into the sea, never to be seen again.
The chemist makes a simple observation.
"Biologists and physicists are soluble in water."
The McLaren Formula 1 team has begun hiring mechanics with trisomy 21
You know, for the extra Down force.
You can explore mechanics adjustment reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean mechanics physics dad jokes. There are also mechanics puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Women hate mechanics.
All they do is screw, nut, and bolt.
Where did the lazy quantum mechanics student say his project was
in a box
Nothing gets panties wet like a Navier-Stokes equation.
It's not called fluid mechanics for nothing.
I like what mechanics wear...
overall.
How does Dumbo fly?
He just does. The mechanics of it are ear elephant.
I was going to tell a joke about quantum mechanics
but even though its funny, it's also unfunny at the same time.
Some mechanics can tune a car by ear.
You could say they perform feats of engine hearing.
What do you call a mechanics tears?
Blinker Fluid
Yo mama so easy
That in the many worlds interpretation of quantum mechanics, I've slept with her in every universe.
[NSFW] How do mechanics have sex?
They nut and bolt.
Penguin.
A penguin goes to get his car fixed at the mechanics on a hot day. Mechanic tells penguin it will be a while, so the penguin goes to the shop across the road and get some yummy vanilla icecream. The penguin returns to the mechanic and the mechanic says "looks like you've blown a seal.". the penguin replies "no it's only icecream."
Cats probably like boxes because of quantum mechanics.
Could be getting into a box really makes them feel alive. Who knows?
Last night I had this dream that I was in a mechanics garage. And of all things I found that I was a muffler.
Woke up completely exhausted.
Did you hear that a bunch of mechanics started an uprising and overthrew the government?
they called it the "Automan" Empire.
Knowing quantum mechanics is both a blessing and a curse.
OC, what do you think?
Why don't mechanics date 10's?
Things usually don't work out and they end up losing them
If mechanics were like doctors
Customer: My car makes a weird noise when I steer to the left.
Mechanic: Then don't steer to the left.
Woman are like an open book
But it's written in chinese and about quantum mechanics.
I have a degree in the design and mechanics of television controllers
I don't know what I'm going to do with this remote knowledge.
Why are auto mechanics flocking to San Francisco?
They heard how often residents there tend to blow trannies.
Why do auto mechanics make the best lovers?
Because they know how to suck, squeeze, bang, blow.
My mechanics gone crazy!
He's torquing nuts!
Why are mechanics absent fathers?
Because they nut and bolt
If you go to a mechanics shop to get laid but get caught
do you screw, nut, and bolt?
What do mechanics call one night stands?
Nuts & bolts
I've been looking into the differences between propeller mechanics and human anatomy lately;
And I've gotta say: I'm not a fan.
Electronic Arts CEO Andrew Wilson has a one night stand.
The woman he was with contacts him soon after to let him know she was pregnant, and wants him to own up to his mistake.
Andrew then replies, "It's not a mistake, it's surprise mechanics."
European heaven/ European hell
European heaven is a place where the chefs are spanish, the police is british, the mechanics are germans, the lovers are italians and everything is organized by the swiss.
European hell is a place where the chefs are british, the police is german, the mechanics are spanish, the lovers are swiss and everything is organized by the italians.
Heaven is a place where the police are English, the cooks are French, the mechanics are German, the lovers are Italian, and everything is organized by the Swiss...
Hell, on the other hand, is where the police are German, the cooks are English, the mechanics are French, the lovers are Swiss, and everything is organized by the Americans.
Why are KKK members terrible mechanics?
They never check under the hood.
Heaven is...
Heaven is where the cooks are French, the police are British, the mechanics are German, the lovers are Italian and everything is organized by the Swiss.
Hell is where the cooks are British, the police are German, the mechanics are French, the lovers are Swiss, and everything is organized by the Italians.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the mechanics tyres jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working mechanics layover piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.