Mean Chinese Jokes

33 mean chinese jokes and hilarious mean chinese puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mean chinese that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Mean Chinese Short Jokes

Short mean chinese jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mean chinese humour may include short bad chinese jokes also.

  1. I don't get why Japanese people and South Korean people just can't get along. I mean, they're all Chinese.
  2. I was sitting in the Chinese restaurant, thinking about how duckling means little duck... So I canceled my order of dumplings.
  3. The Jewish Year is 5776. As of yesterday, the Chinese year is 4714... That means Jews had to exist for 1,062 years without Chinese Food. They call this time, "The Dark Age."
  4. My Chinese neighbour said he's just opened a crows shop. Speaking slowly, I said "you mean a *clothes* shop?"
    He says, "No, a crows shop - come in and have a rook."
  5. The Chinese have the best Democracy in the World They have tiny elections every few hours.
    ;) if you know what I mean
  6. I don't know how the Chinese fell for Mao and the communist party I mean, there were a freakin ton of red flags.
  7. New DNA tests have revealed that Orville and Wilbur's parents were actually Chinese. So I guess that means two Wongs make a Wright.
  8. Chinese. I was speaking to a Chinese guy, he said I just bought a Crows shop, I said don't you mean a clothes shop?? he replied, no come and have a Rook...
  9. Apparently 1 in 7 people in the world are Chinese. That means it's either me, my mum, dad, brother Steve, brother Craig, sister hanna, or brother huangxi.
    I suspect Craig.
  10. Chinese man: Do you like cats? Me: No.
    Chinese man: That means you haven`t cooked them properly.

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Mean Chinese One Liners

Which mean chinese one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mean chinese? I can suggest the ones about mean asian and chinese people.

  1. What chinese name means 'wolf'? Hau Ling.

Hilarious Mean Chinese Jokes for a Fun-Filled Night with Friends

What funny jokes about mean chinese you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean chinese asian jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mean chinese pranks.

A jew and a Chinese man are in an argument...

The jew says, "I hate your people for what you did at pearl harbour". The Chinese man says, what do you mean? That was the Japanese!". The jew replies, "Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same. So the Chinese man says, "Well I hate your people for sinking the titanic". The jew says, "That's ridiculous; an iceberg sunk the titanic!". The Chinese man responds, "Iceberg, Goldberg, Silverberg, you're all the same".

s**...! s**...! s**...! Free s**... tonight!

I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "s**...! s**...! s**...! Free s**... tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 6**...-3629."

For a moment, i had a different opinion on 'Chinese girls'

This Valentines day, I asked a Chinese girl for her number.
She said, "s**...! s**...! s**...! Free s**... tonight!"
I said, "Wow!"
Then her friend said, "She means 6**...-3629."

A Chinese doctor has a Jewish patient.

"Listen," says the patient, "I didn't think we were going to get along so good together."
"What do you mean?"
"What do I mean! Pearl Harbor, that's what I mean!"
"What are you talking about, Pearl Harbor? I'm Chinese!"
"Yeah, well...Chinese, Japanese, it's all the same thing."
"What do you mean, all the same thing? The Jews sunk the Titanic!"
"The Jews sunk the Titanic?"
"Sure. Greenberg, Goldberg, Iceburg, all the same to me!"

Romney was asked about the Chinese going to the moon...

He responded that when they are up there, they will be able to see the flag we planted over 40 years ago. This is a pretty clever comeback. But the last laugh is on us. The US flags are now all beached white due to the unprotected exposure to the sun's UV radiation. This means the Chinese will think the French made it first.

I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "s**...! s**...! s**...! Free s**... tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said,

I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "s**...! s**...! s**...! Free s**... tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 6**...-3629.

A Chinese girl asked to get a ride from me.

so I said no problem give me your number I will call you when I leave home
She said, "s**...! s**...! s**...! Free s**... tonight!" I said, "HOLD ON!"
Then her friend said, "She means ....6**...-3629."

Trump receives a message

Last week Trump received a coded message, reportedly from Chinese Hackers.
It read: 370HSSV-0773H
Trump was stumped and asked Pence what the message could mean. Pence was totally stumped too, so they passed it to the top American programmers, who spent 2 days trying to decipher it. Knackered, the programmers sent it to the FBI.
The Director of the FBI suggested Trump should turn the message upside down.

A man went to China.

He hired a p**... to keep him company during the night, and when things got serious, she kept shouting a word in Chinese.
The next day, the man went to a golf course with a couple of business associates. They had a good afternoon until a person hit a hole in one. Everyone started shouting in excitement, and the man decided to join in, shouting the word he hears last night, thinking it was that of excitement.
Everyone turned to the man in silence. After a full minute of awkward silence, the one who made the shot asked "What do you mean, wrong hole?"

Asked a Chinese girl for her number last night

She shouts "s**...! s**...! s**...! free s**... tonight!"
Yes please, I said.
Her friend pipes up and says "She means 6**...-3629"

The UN recently published the results of a poll. The topic was: "Please truthfully give your opinion on food shortage in the rest of the world."

Europeans requested explanation of the term "shortage".
Africans asked what "food" is.
Chinese inquired about the term "opinion".
Americans wondered what "rest of the world" might possibly mean.
And in Italy they are still discussing the meaning of the term "truthfully".

A New York Times reporter is interviewing some people

The first question asked is "What is your honest opinion about the shortage of meat in the world?"
The interview was a huge failure...
The African asks "What does meat mean?".
The American asks "What does shortage mean?".
The Chinese person asks "What does opinion mean?".
The Russian asks "What does honest mean?"
The North Korean just waits. The reporter asks again, and is told "The Interview is no good!"

A chinese couple, new parents, visit their doctor. "We're a little concerned about our son", the mother says...

..."He looks, well, caucasian!". The doctor has a look and agrees. " I see what you mean. Two wongs don't make a white". The parents nod. "By the way, what's his name?". The doctor asks. The father replies "Sum Ting Wong".

This joke about Covid circulating around Chinese web boards...

If someone walking ahead of you farts and you can can hear it, that means you're not practicing correct social distancing.
If you can smell it, that means you're not wearing your mask properly.
If you are wearing your mask properly and can still smell it, then congratulations, you don't have covid-19.

The Knees and the key.

My roommate in college was born in China. Once, at a get-together, someone asked him, What kind of 'knees' are you?
He asked, What do you mean?
You know — Chinese, Japanese…
He said, Oh, I am Chinese. What kind of key are you?
Key? they asked.
You know — Yankee, donkey, monkey…

My Chinese friend got really sick one day

I went to the hospital to see how he's doin, but he just kept whispering Yang qi guan! Yang qi guan! Yang qi guan!" over and over – and then died.
I was very sad and a few days later I googled his last message after the burial. Apparently, it means You're standing on my oxygen tube.

So I asked this Chinese girl for her number...

She said s**..., s**..., s**...! Free s**... tonight! I thought things were getting interesting, but her friend was quick to correct her, She means 6**... 3629 .
I was never more disappointed to get a phone number.

I asked a Chinese girl for her number...

She said " s**..., s**..., s**...! Free s**... tonight!"
Her friend said "She means 6**...-3629."

Me: *arriving at the office after lunch in a nice red dress.*

My boss: Why are you dressed as a woman?!
Me: What do you mean? You asked me if i could join the meeting with the Chinese as a trans later?

A guy asks a Chinese lady for her phone number she says, "Free, s**..., free, s**..., tonight."
The guy said," wow" and her friend says she means 363629.

Kim Jong Un went to get his palm read.

"Ah", said the mystic. "One year from now I see great glory in your future.
Two years from now I see even greater glory.
Three years from now the glory is joined by love.
However I must warn you that past that I can read nothing of your future."
At this the dictator gets a bit panicked. " Do you mean to tell me that my enemies seek to kill me and will destroy glorious Korea in 4 years time?"
" No, no", assures the fortune teller. "Your existence and that of Korea continues beyond the next three years, I just can't read any of it because I can't read Chinese."

Chung Hoi

A famous American golfer is invited to go to China for a golfing tournament.
From the second he gets there, he is treated like a king.
He is given five-star treatment in a five-star hotel until the day of the tournament.
The night before the tournament, he is sitting in his hotel room watching TV.
A hot Asian girl walks up to his room and he says, "Wow. They must really love me here."
He begins to have s**... with her the whole night. She continues to scream, "Chung Hoi! Chung Hoi!," but he ignores it.
At the tournament, the American golfer gets a hole-in-one and gets really excited.
He starts yelling, "Chung Hoi! Chung Hoi!"
One of the Chinese golfers says, "What do you mean 'WRONG HOLE'?"

jokes about mean chinese