## Hilarious Fun Mathematical Jokes That Will Have You Rolling with Laughter

### Georgia joke

The owner of a golf course in Georgia was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help.

He called her into his office and said, "Y'all graduated from the University of Georgia and I need some help. If I wuz to give yew $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"

The secretary thought a moment, and then replied, "Everthang but my earrings."

### A businessman is at the office.

He was confused about a bill he had received, so he asked his secretary for some mathematical help. "If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off? " he asked her.

The secretary replied, "Everything but my earrings. "

### A mathematical limerick

A dozen, a gross, and a score

Plus three times the square root of four

Divided by seven

Plus five times eleven

Is nine squared and not a bit more.

### Who is the rudest person in my mathematical family?

Aunt Sally

### What is the mathematical definition for a threesome?

3x/2

[3 halves x...................3 have sex]

(/spoiler)

### What is Jesus' favorite mathematical operation?

The Cross Product

### Someone recently discovered the mathematical formula underpinning every Beatles song ever!

She got the Strawberry Fields Medal.

### Start a mathematical hip-hop duo called "E"

Because E equals MC^2

### I met a Japanese mathematician yesterday

Japanese Mathematician: "Acknowledge my presence, zero"

Me: "Can you elaborate in mathematical terms?"

Japanese Mathematician: "Notice me sin(pi)"

### What are Muslim men's favorite mathematical equation?

Inequalities

### What mathematical operation is used to calculate the rate at which lumberjacks cut wood?

Logger-rhythms.

You can explore mathematical mathematic reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean mathematical math dad jokes. There are also mathematical puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

### All the mathematical functions went to a party...

There they saw the exponential function sitting by himself

They poked him, "c'mon man, join the party"

To which he replied, "it's not my fault, eveytime I try to integrate, I just end up with myself"

### What do you call four rats on a mathematical equation?

A quadratic equation :)

### 69 in mathematical terms.

(h/p) Γ· (h/v) = (hv/ph)

### Mathematically speaking..

The average person is mean. :-)

### What mathematical cube can you cook with?

A boolean cube!

### 'I Love You' is a mathematical function

'I Love You' is a mathematical function where,

'I Love' - is constant and ;

'You' - is a variable..

### If there was a mathematical equation to describe social justice warriors...

It would be a really nice log.

An ideal log.

### What is ISIS's favorite mathematical operation?

Square Root.

Anything it is applied to becomes radicalized.

### What is a Hitman's favorite Mathematical Field?

*Trigger*nometry

### Maths Teacher Was Teaching Mathematical Conversions....

Teacher-If 1000 Kgs= Ton.

Then!

For 3000 Kgs =How Much?

Student - Ton!Ton!Ton!

### What is a stoner's favorite mathematical term/status?

Hypotenuse.

### What do you call a mathematical snake?

A Ο-thon.

### A village of mathematical functions is slumbering

when suddenly the alarm bells ring:

a rogue differential operator has been sighted.

Fearing for their life, the functions run away or try to hide, but a brave function stands its ground and confronts the aggressor: I am e to the x, you cannot do anything to me! Go away!

The differential operator calmly replies: but I am d over dt, and proceeds to swallow the poor exponential.

### I've solved every single mathematical problem!

I have nothing more to add

### How do you induce a current in a wire by counting to 10?

By mathematical induction.

### Mathematical Sex.

Sex is like math:

Add the bed

Subtract the clothes

Divide the legs and pray you dont multiply

### What do you call a mathematical function with too many powers?

An exponential crisis.

### I hate mathematical formulas.

They're deriving me crazy.

### Did you hear about the mathematical vandals?

They cover the walls in graph-iti.

### I like my women like I like my mathematical constants.

Round and irrational.

Happy Pi Day everyone!

### A thief stole a sine and a cosine.

He took the two identities to a beach. However, they were too heavy for him to carry. Β He wanted to keep them under the sand, but the beach was so narrow that it could only contain one of them: sine or cosine.

He decided that, using his mathematical skills, that he would stack sine over cosine - but that resulted in tan! He did not want to get tan. So he stacked cosind over sine...

and then he got cot.

### What do you call a Mathematical song that could save the environment?

An Al-Gore-Rhythm.

### Philosophers and Mathematicians will argue about how bad this one is for centuries

A mathematical proof for the existence of surjective functions is an onto-logical argument

### How do you personally insult two similarly pronounced mathematical terms?

Ad hominem

### What does a mathematical mermaid wear when she can't find her seashells?

An algebra.

### What's a contract's favorite mathematical function?

Sin and Cos

### My mathematical friend came over one day.

They asked if I had any beer. I said no, but I have some root beer and square glasses to drink from.

### What's Hitler's favorite mathematical process?

Process of elimination

### What is the mathematical formula for the sound of a front door closing?

It's the base decibel level raised to the power of n. The exponent n represents the number of hours ago you told your wife you'd be home.

### In Kent a business man was con

In Kent a business man was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help.

He called her into his office and said, "You graduated from the University of Essex and I need some help. If I were to give you Β£20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"

The secretary thought a moment, and then replied, "Everything but my earrings!"

### Three fishermen catch a mermaid. If they agree to set her free, she will grant them each a wish. The first guy says, "OK, I want you to double my I.Q." Immediately, the guy recites Shakespeare flawlessly. The second guy asks the mermaid to triple his I.Q.

Suddenly, he's spouting complicated mathematical solutions. Impressed, the last guy asks the mermaid to quintuple his I.Q. The mermaid hesitates and asks, "Are you sure that's what you really want?" "Absolutely!" says the man. The mermaid smiles. Instantly, the third man turns into a woman.

### Why do mathematicians confuse Halloween and Christmas?

Because OCT 31 = DEC 25.

This might be the nerdiest joke I know. Here's a bonus mathematical nerd joke:

Why don't riddles work in octal notation?

Because seven ten eleven.

### If you are having trouble unlocking your front door, take out your wallet and arrange all the bills in mathematical order.

Because organizing your finances is key.

### Which mathematical phenomenon only uses imaginary numbers?

The Fib-Bonacci Sequence.

### All the mathematical functions are having a party

The polynomials are dancing, the square root function is drinking, yet the exponential function remains to the side.

so the inverse function asks what's wrong.

To which the exponential function responds: whether I integrate or not, nothing will change, now leave.

(courtesy of my physics teacher, I translated from French so might suck, don't gimme too much flak)

### Puns make me numb

Mathematical puns makes me number

### Math

A businessman was confused about a bill he had received, so he asked his secretary for some mathematical help.

"If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?" he asked her.

The secretary replied, "Everything but my earrings."

### A divine mathematical story

After creating the world, the Lord looked at it and he said to the animals "Go forth and multiply!"

The snakes came to him and said "Oh Lord, please forgive us, we cannot do as you command, for we are adders".

The Lord turned to the trees and said "Fall over and build furniture from your trunk, because adders can multiply with the aid of log tables".

Words of the Lord of math.

### We all know that Barney the Dinosaur is a LOVABLE PURPLE DINOSAUR.

In ancient Rome, there was no letter U, so they used a V instead, making Barney a LOVABLE PVRPLE DINOSAVR.

Now eliminate all the letters that are not Roman numerals. We are left with LVL VL DIV.

Next, let's refresh your brain. I=1, V=5, L=50, D=500.

When we add it all up, we get 50+5+50+5+50+500+1+5=666.

And there you have it. Mathematical proof that Barney the Dinosaur is Satan.

### Mathematical joke - Why did Sin go to the beach?

Cos he wanted a Tan

### What is the difference between a maths professor and a physics professor?

You can get mathematical with the maths professor.