Math Homework Jokes
42 math homework jokes and hilarious math homework puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about math homework that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Math Homework Short Jokes
Short math homework jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The math homework humour may include short math problem jokes also.
- My daughter is making graphs for her math homework. Awfully suspicious... Pretty sure she's plotting something.
- Math Teacher: Your homework looks like chicken scratch, but you have all the correct answers Later at Home: I think she's on to us, mathmachicken
- I was so busy with maths homework that I didn't brush my teeth for a week The calculus had built up, and it was starting to get quite hard.
- My son asked if I could help him with his math homework. He said "Do I know the square root of minus 1?" I said "aye"
- My friend asked me to assist him with his math homework. I should probably help him before he stops *counting* on me.
- I mailed my maths homework to Barack Obama, Vladimir Putin and Queen Elizabeth II ...it said to give my answers to 3 significant figures.
- A math tutor agrees to help a hot student with her homework. His friends upon hearing this ask him if he made it to 3rd base with her. The math tutor replies "no. I made it to base 10."
- "Dad, can you do my math homework for me?" "No son, it wouldn't be right." "Well, at least you could try."
- Why did the student hire an Instagram model to help with his math homework? Because it's the thot that counts
- My son was like "I got a D in my maths" and I was like "That's really bad" and my wife was like "you need to stop doing his homework."
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Math Homework One Liners
Which math homework one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with math homework? I can suggest the ones about math test and math exam.
- Why are Chinese kids so good at math? Because their dog doesn't eat their homework
- Why are Asians so good at Math? Their dogs can't eat their homework.
- I always put my glasses on when doing Math homework. It improves division
- Why did Obi-wan not do his math homework? Because only a Sith deals in absolutes.
- Why did Timmy do his math homework at the gym? He wanted to *work them out*!
- I needed help with my math homework So I looked up "How to achieve the Final Solution"
- Need help with your math homework? Visit mcdonalds.com/careers
Math Homework Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about math homework you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean math solving jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make math homework pranks.
Teacher: Why does the statue of liberty stand in New York harbour?
Pupil: Because it can’t sit down!
An ideal homework excuse
Teacher: Where is your homework?
Pupil: I lost it fighting this kid who said you weren’t the best teacher in the school
Teacher: If 1+1=2 and 2+2=4, what is 4+4?
Pupil: That’s not fair!
You answer the easy ones and leave us with the hard one!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An escalating series of math jokes
Me: Roses are red. Violets are blue. Math is hard, and so I am.
Her: I wish you were my differential equations homework... because if you were, you would be hard and I would be doing you on my desk.
Me: Well, I'm awfully glad you're not *my* differential equations homework... because if you were, you would be 6 weeks late.
Meanie-Pie Girl
I was working on a large amount of math homework in a group today, and one of the female participants was being prissy and in general a nuisance. So I patted her on the head. She says, 'Did you just pat me on the head?' So I say, "Yes, you were being mean so I was de-meaning you."
A little Jewish boy in Catholic school
There was once a little Jewish boy who for the life of him was terrible at math. His parents had tried everything and nothing seemed to be working, so as their last resort they decided to send him to the local Catholic school because it had the best math program in the area.
The first day, and every day after, the little boy came home and went straight upstairs and did all his homework. When they finally received his report card he had straight A's. They were baffled an very curious about what the school did that worked so well, so they asked him "Son, what did this school do differently that helped you learn so well"
the son replied "Well, "On that first day, when I walked in the front door and saw that guy nailed to the plus sign, I KNEW they meant business!"
"
Why did the student act crazy each time he worked on math homework?
He was on crystal math.
Was helping somebody do their math homework dealing with absolute values.
I then realized that her math teacher was a Sith Lord, because only Sith Lords deal in absolutes.
Two 5th graders are doing Math homework.
One tells the other, "I don't know what 99 is in Roman numerals."
The other lowers her glasses and says, "IC."
In my math homework I was asked what's the difference a racist and a mathematician.
I need help solving this equation, maybe one of you could ask one of your Asian friends for me?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's a sharks favorite game?
s**... the leader.
*This joke has been brought to you by my 8 year old's math homework.*
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do you know if an Asian person has robbed your house?
When you come home, your math homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and they're still trying to back out of the driveway.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Hey girl are you my math homework?
Because I'm going to pretend I never knew you, but in reality my dog ate you.
My 6 year-old son returns home with a sad expression on his face after getting a bad grade on Math that day
My wife agrees that I should stop helping him with his homework.
Son comes home after school
As he walked into the living room, his half-drunk father greets him:
"Hey son, how was school?"
The son replies:
"Alright I guess, the math teacher gave us homework and I'm not sure I know how to do it."
"Here, let your old man help ya. How does it go?" - says dad
Son opens his textbook and starts reading the assignment:
"Charles has 14 apples, he gives 2 to his mom and 4 to his dad. How many apples does he have left?"
The dad leans back in his chair to think. For a few minutes he stares into the air doing calculations in his head. Another 5 minutes pass, and he looks at his son and says:
"What did ya say his name was again?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A little boy was doing his math homework and practicing out loud, Two plus six, that son of a b**... is eight...
Three plus seven, that son of a b**... is ten."
Hearing what he was saying, his mother asked him what he was doing. He answered that he was doing his math homework.
"And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" she asked her son to which he replied yes.
Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher what she is teaching in math class. The teacher said, "Right now, we are learning addition."
The mother asked if she was teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a b**... is four.
Laughing, the teacher replied, "What I taught them was, two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four."
A pirate walks into the kitchen and announces:
A pirate walks into the kitchen and announces:
"Someone call fer me?"
I look down at my homework, and back up at the pirate and say, "uhhh, I was just trying to figure out how to do this problem, nothing a pirate could help with."
The pirate walks menacingly toward me, and I consider whether to run or stay put.
"It's... ...uhhh... these circles... math...," I mutter, terrified.
"Arrrrrrr-ea? Well, every pirate knows that. It's 'Arrrrr pi Arrrrr'"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The son of a b**...
Henry was doing maths homework, saying to himself...
"2+5, the son of a b**... is 7"
"3+6, the son of a b**... is 9"
His mother heard this & asked, " Henry ! What is this nonsense you are doing?"
"Oh Mom. Don't disturb. I am doing my maths homework"
Mom: "Is this how your teacher taught you?"
"Yes mom "
Infuriated mother picked up her cell phone and called the teacher:
"Are you teaching maths to children by saying... 2+2, the son of a b**... is 4?"
There was silence for a moment
Then the teacher started laughing :
"What I taught them was... 2+2 THE SUM OF WHICH IS 4."
***
A man calls the National Security Agency...
Man: Hello, I heard you record all our phone conversations, is that correct?
Agent: No sir, we don't do that
Man: Oh shoot. I was just talking to my wife and she gave me a list of things to do and I can't remember! I thought I would check with you rather than call her back and let her know I wasn't listening!
Agent: I'm sorry to hear that sir, but as I said, we don't listen to civilian conversations. However, you should:
1. Pick up a gallon of milk
2. 2 dozen eggs
3. 4 Macintosh apples
4. Help Sofia with her math homework
....
MOM: "No more TV until you finish your math homework!"
KID: "Aww, Mom! When am I ever gonna use math in real life? I'm gonna grow up to be a super rich rock star...I'll pay people to do math \*for\* me."
MOM: "Well, why didn't you say so? That's a wonderful goal! And I know exactly how to help you pursue it."
THE NEXT DAY
MOM: "No more TV until you finish your guitar practice!"
KID: "Aww, Mom!"