The Best 27 Materials Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Materials jokes. There are some materials resources jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these materials organisms puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Materials Jokes and Puns

A Politician wanted to build a bridge

A Politician wanted to build a bridge.

So, he calls 3 engineeering firms. One is Chinese, other is American and the last one is Brazillian.

The politician calls the heads of all the 3 firms to his office.

He asks the Chinese head, "How much do you take to build the bridge?"

He says, "3 Million Dollar. 1 Million for the workers, 1 Million for materials, 1 million for the profit."

The Politician asks the American head, "How much do you take to build the bridge?"

He says, "6 Million Dollars. 2 Million for the workers, 2 Million for materials, 2 million for the profit."

Finally, the Politician asks the Brazillian head, "How much do you take to build the bridge?"

He replies, "9 Million Dollars."

Suprised, the Politician asks him, "Why? Why so much?"

To which he replies, "3 Million for me, 3 Million for you, and 3 Million for the Chinese guy to build the bridge."

Mike joins a new school.

After school is over he returns home to his mother.

Mom: So Mike, how was your day today?

Mike: It was great! We learned about explosive materials in our lab today.

Mom: That sounds interesting, so what will you learn in school tomorrow?

Mike: What school?

So, there are two men.

They know each other for years now. Frank, a brain surgeon from new york and Ahmad a former refugee from syria.

Both men want to build an house and decide to build their houses in the very same street, next to each other. They even ask the architect to just copy the first house!

And when the houses are built Ahmad says to Frank: "My house is worth more than yours."

"How can that be? We both live next to each other!"


"Our houses were built identically, with the same materials."


"So how can it be, Ahmad?"

"Very simple: I live next to a brain surgeon and you live next to a refugee!"

Materials joke, So, there are two men.

Why do you need to carry radioactive materials in sealed, lead containers?

To stop it from falling out.

I was trying to expose the cement company for using cheap materials

But I couldn't find any concrete evidence

My job is sectioning and dehydrating organic materials.

It may sound complicated, but it's actually cut and dry.

no Idea why they arrested me...

I just read the sign and complied...

it said:

NO campaign materials or **clothing** allowed in polling place.

Materials joke, no Idea why they arrested me...

Why are submarines more dangerous than regular ships?

They're built with sub-standard materials.

We shouldn't be too hard on people who use toxic building materials.

They did asbestos they could.

One of the Saddest Stories I've Ever Heard

The HighSchool Girls National diving team's plane crashed into the ocean, and they washed up on a deserted island.

Physically, the few survivors were unharmed, but as the days past, their minds began to crack as they realized that they had not the tools, knowledge, or materials to build a working diving board and bring some normalcy back into their lives!
But alas… The poor bastards were forced to resort to cannonballism.

I thought my wife was going on a Belgium holiday to buy chocolates. When she got back, I found out she'd actually been on holiday in Paris buying curtain materials.

It was a fabrication.

You can explore materials labs reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean materials fabrics dad jokes. There are also materials puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

A mathematician is asked to build a fence around a flock of sheep using the least amount of materials possible.

So he builds a fence around himself and then defines himself as outside.

There's been some interesting science news today.

Apparently materials with a half life of 3 pass through valves at a extremely slow rate.

-plauge inc

EA to donate 50% of profits from future titles to starving children around the world.

After they make them purchase the postage, packing materials, fuel for the planes, silverware, plates, drinking cups, seasonings, construct hand out facilities, eating establishments, refuse disposal, environmental studies on said refuse disposal, labor costs and finally any and all expenses from Frank Gaybeau's cocaine induced, hotel filled, 5 figure by the hour escort stuffed full on satanic orgy fest.

What does the blacksmith say when his materials are on sale?

"What a steel!"

I was TAing an electrostatics lab.

The experiment was to see what happens when you rub wool on a bunch of rods of different materials and then bring the rods near scraps of paper. One student's lab report had this observation on what happens when you try to electrostatically charge up a metal rod and bring it near paper: paper remains stationery

Materials joke, I was TAing an electrostatics lab.

I recently went to a science seminar on new materials we could use to make knives more efficient

It was cutting edge stuff.

Makes sense Apple fans would buy a MacBook candle...

...They're already used to the smell of burning synthetic materials and watching their money go up in flames.

I heard in the news that thay've found harmful materials in cosmetics and childrens crayons, but in the defense of the big corporations...

They're doing asbestos they can.

[NSFW] What materials does a 13 y/o Fortnite boy wake up with?

999 wood

Viruses inject their genetic materials into organisms.

It's the same way with guys.

Science have confirmed that humans can consume extremely poisonous materials and even drink molten lava


There I was, waiting to pay for my landscaping materials, when suddenly...

...I was charged for aggregated basalt.

One I made on my own. I've been told it is worthy of submission.

My friend, the architect.

So the other day I was talking to my architect friend who was working on one of his houses. I asked him how it was going, and he said pretty well. He said the first two walls had been raised, and that they were working on the third. I looked around, but didn't see any more building materials, so I asked what about the fourth wall? He looked up and said, what? You must be joking!

I was installing a new kitchen backsplash the other day, when I started to run low on materials...

my issue proved to be futile.

Dr. Watson: Sherlock, what type of rocks are these? They seem to made up of smaller materials.

Sherlock: Sedimentary my dear Watson!

Glass Shower Door Media

There are plenty of cleaning products that are available over the counter which can clean the glass, tiles and every other part of the shower. However, there are other ways to do shower glass door cleaning which you can do on your own. Here are some materials that you can find at home which can also work great for your shower.
Glass Shower Door Media

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the materials properties jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working materials chemical piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes