Matchbox Jokes

What are some Matchbox jokes?

Two brother sit under the christmas tree....

One gets dozens of presents. He opens one after another, a tablet, a drone, a bike and plenty other things.

The other only gets one present with his name on it: a matchbox car.

The one boy with all the presents maliciously asks: guess whom they like more!

The other, calmly playing with the matchbox car, asks back: guess who has cancer.

The Jewish Samurai [Long]

The Emperor of Japan loses his most trusted bodyguard, and sends out a proclamation to the whole empire: Bring forth the best samurai to show their skills, so that they may guard my life.

Three samurai enter the throne room: A samurai from Edo, A samurai from osaka, and a jew.

The first samurai bows to the emperor, then opens up a matchbox. A single fly comes out, and flies up. The samurai swings his sword once, and the fly drops dead in two pieces. The emperor is impressed.

The second samurai bows, opens a matchbox, and a fly comes out. His sword swings twice, and the fly drops dead in four pieces. The emperor stands and claps, even more impressed.

The jew comes up, bows before the emperor, and opens a matchbox. A fly comes out, the jew puts on his glasses, then proceeds to chase the fly around the throne room, swinging wildly. After about 30 swings, the jew re-sheathes his sword, and the fly flies away. The emperor is confused, and asks: "Why is the fly not dead?"

The jew's response? "Circumcision isn't meant to kill."

Old Aussie joke: Why is the lady on the Red Heads matchbox always smiling?


There are 48 heads in her box - of course she`s happy!

The doctor said I have Matchbox 20/20 vision . . .

Typical RobThomatrist.

How to make Matchbox jokes?

We have collected gags and puns about Matchbox to have fun with. Do you want to stand out in a crowd with a good sense of humour joking about Matchbox? If Yes here are a lot more hilarious lines and funny Matchbox pick up lines to share with friends.

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