Massachusetts Jokes

45 massachusetts jokes and hilarious massachusetts puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about massachusetts that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Check out these funny Massachusetts jokes that poke fun at the Bay State and its neighboring states! From Massachusetts inside jokes to jokes about Connecticut, Nevada, and even ALA, you won't want to miss out on these hilarious quips!

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Best Short Massachusetts Jokes

Short massachusetts puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The massachusetts humour may include short distribution jokes also.

  1. Surveys show people from Massachusetts go camping more than any other state. Their destination usually includes one of Connecticut's many passing lanes.
  2. My local news station had a story about a string of killings at churches in Massachusetts. "Mass mass mass murders." they said.
  3. If you're from Virginia, you're a Virginian. If you're from New York, you're a New Yorker. If you're from Texas, you're a Texan. And if you're from Massachusetts, you're a Democrat.
  4. What do you call shooting into a crowd of people at church in Massachusetts? A mass mass mass shooting
  5. Why did the Massachusetts driver use their blinker while turning? It wasn't on purpose, he just nodded off.
  6. A Bostonian shooter opens fire on a Catholic meeting, killing 28 and injuring dozens more. The newspaper headline the next day reads:
    "A Massive Massacre Occurs at Mass in Massachusetts."
  7. What do you call it when... A guy from Massachusetts doesn't pull out?
    A Boston cream pie!
  8. I've been travelling around America for so long now. Hawaii, Massachusetts, Texas... The end is NY.
  9. If a Church Congregation from Massachusetts goes on a Bus Ride It would be Mass Mass Mass Transit
  10. Why doesn't Massachusetts have a Debate team? Because it would be called the Mass-Debate team.
Massachusetts joke, Why doesn't Massachusetts have a Debate team?

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about massachusetts can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of massachusetts puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Massachusetts One Liners

Which massachusetts one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with massachusetts? I can suggest the ones about residents and northern.

  1. What state would expect to see a priest pray, sneeze and sit down Massachusetts
  2. What do you call a grandma drag queen from Massachusetts? A Nantucket.
  3. What do you call 4046 m² of Massachusetts' largest city? A Boston MassAcre
  4. [Massachusetts] How do you know you're halfway to p-town? You're entering Dennis
  5. Its so cold In Massachusetts I just seen a democrat with his hands in his own pockets! ;)
  6. In what state do you watch a preist sneeze then sit down? Massachusetts
  7. Who was the first resident of Massachusetts? One achusetts.
  8. What's the capital of Massachusetts? M
  9. What do you call a man that got unfrozen that lives in Massachusetts? Boston Powers
  10. There once was a man from Massachusetts And his name is JOHN CENAAAAAAA
  11. What is a Lumber-Jack from Massachusetts' favorite drink? A Boston Logger.
  12. The Commonwealth of Massachusetts, is more like the Common-poor of Massachusetts
  13. I was driving behind a guy from Massachusetts today. He had a lot of bumpah stickahs.
  14. What do you call a Massachusetts p**...? A Boston c**...
  15. What do you call a gang r**... in Massachusetts? A Boston Cream Pie.

Massachusetts joke, What do you call a gang r**... in Massachusetts?

Great Massachusetts Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends

What funny jokes about massachusetts you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean state jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make massachusetts prank.

In celebration of my very first Cake Day, I'm reposting one of my own jokes:

A truck loaded with Worcestershire sauce is driving through Saskatoon, Saskatchewan when it collides with a Nissan Qashqai.
The truck then careens down the road and hits a car from Massachusetts, injuring the two otorhinolaryngologists inside. One of them, suffering from Schistosomiasis, has a myocardial infarction.
A bystander witnesses the entire event and quickly calls to report the accident on his Huawei.
The emergency operator asks the bystander, "What happened?"
"It's hard to say."

I was pulled over in Massachusetts for reckless driving.

When brought before the judge, I was asked if I knew what the punishment for drunk driving in that state was. I said, "I don't know... reelection to the Senate?"

It's scary living in Massachusetts...

Every time I watch the news I hear about Mass shootings.

Why did Sir Isaac Newton bet on the Patriots?

Because he knows that force equals Massachusetts.

What do you call someone from Massachusetts who murders a bunch of Catholics?

A Mass. Mass Mass m**....

The Crow Mystery

Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts.
However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.
MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.
The Ornithological Behaviorist very quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger.
The scientific conclusion was that while all the lookout crows could say "Cah", none could say "Truck."

At this point in my life, my resume's "

special skills" section just says: "pronounces Massachusetts towns" and "can nap on planes."

Guy walks into a bar

A guy walks into a bar in Alabama and the bartender asks, What can I get you sir?
Man says, White wine .
Everyone in the bar overheard and gives him a stern look, bartender then proceeds to ask, You're not from around here are ya?
Man: Nope from Massachusetts's
Bartender: Well what do you do for a living?
Man: I'm a Taxidermist
Bartender is confused and proceeds to ask what it is he does.
Man: I mount animals for a living!
Bartender yells out to the bar, Don't worry boys he's one of us!!

Engineer searching for a job

Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asks a young engineer fresh out of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, "And what starting salary are you looking for?" The engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer inquires, "Well, what would you say to a package of five weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every two years, say, a red Corvette?" The engineer sits up straight and says, "Wow! Are you kidding?" The interviewer replies, "Yeah, but you started it."

Massachusetts joke, Engineer searching for a job

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these massachusetts jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.