The Best 21 Marital Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Marital jokes. There are some marital conjugal jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these marital premarital puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Marital Jokes and Puns

Marital Argument

A husband and wife had been arguing all day. They pass a herd of jackasses. The wife says "relatives of yours?" Husband says, "yep, in laws."

Four men are waiting for their wives in a marital ward.

Oregon leads America in both marital infidelity and clinical depression.

What a sad state of affairs.

A researcher carrying out a phone survey on marital sex...

phoned one of the participants to check on a discrepancy. He asked the husband: "In response to the question on frequency of intercourse, you answered 'once a week,' but your wife answered 'several times a night.'"

"That's correct," said the husband. "And that's the way it's going to be until the mortgage is paid off."

Marital Misunderstanding

It's 4.00am. A man comes stumbling home and bursts drunk into his bedroom. He's totally dishevelled, stinks of booze and has a goat tucked under his arm. His wife sits up with a shriek and shouts:

"How dare you come home in that condition! And what's that thing under your arm?"

Her husband looks at her and says:

"This is the pig I sleep with when you're having one of your headaches."

"You idiot. That's not a pig it's a goat!"

"Don't interrupt me when I'm talking to my goat."

Marital problems

"You haven't listened to a word I've said, have you?"

Always seems like a strange way for my wife to start a conversation with me.

A 90 year old woman is getting married for the fourth time.

A news crew is there to document the story. The reporter asks the woman about her odd marital past. "Let me get this right," he says. "Your first husband was a banker. Your second husband was a clown. Your third husband was a doctor, and you're about to marry a mortician. Why the menagerie of different men?" She smirked and said "It was one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready and four to go."

Marital joke, A 90 year old woman is getting married for the fourth time.

What does a Japanese man experience when he marries a Jewish woman?

marital bris

Michigan is leading in rates of both marital infidelity and depression.

It's a sad state of affairs.

What's the difference between Martial and Marital?

Whether the violence is domestic.

A couple are having marital difficulties,

...and the wife suggests they see a marriage counsellor.

At their first session the counsellor asks the couple to explain to each other how they feel about their marriage.

The wife says: We are at a crossroads. To the left is bitterness, resentment, divorce and a life of unhappiness. To the right is reconciliation, love and lifelong happiness.

The husband says: I think you'll find that's a T-junction.

You can explore marital sadie reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean marital separation dad jokes. There are also marital puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Why does Curt Connors have marital problems?

Because of his reptile disfunction

My wife and I were having some marital issues but we have moved on.

We have been doing it doggy style a lot lately, too much if you ask me. I guess I shouldn't complain. Her strap on, her rules.

Any man who has an abusive wife

Any man who has an abusive wife, needs to start practicing marital arts.

Just for laughs, I named my newborn son 'Someoneyourownsize'

Soon I will teach him brutal marital arts

What do divorce lawyers practice to defend themselves?

Marital Arts.

Marital joke, What do divorce lawyers practice to defend themselves?

What helps a straight married couples sex life but ruins a gay married couples sex life?

Marital AIDS

Job Application

I was going through a stack of job applications on my desk when one caught my attention. While the applicant's employment history was stellar, and her education history was certainly above average, apparently she had a few personal problems. Under Marital Status she'd written, Not good and under Spouse's name, she'd written Plaintiff".

Marital trust issues

"So you trusted your wife enough to have your child but not enough to have her in your bank?"

"I trusted **Trojan** to make a better quality condom"

I'll always remember Dad's marital advice...

Marry a woman with small hands so it'll look bigger.

Marital problems and automotive problems are solved the same way.

With a lot of swearing, hammering, and drilling.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the marital extramarital puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working marital marital problems piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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