Marie Jokes
60 marie jokes and hilarious marie puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about marie that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Enjoy a collection of Marie jokes inspired by characters like Boudreaux and Marie, Marie Callender, and popular Maries like Mae, Annette and Jane. Laugh with funny wisecracks and chuckle at witty one-liners. Get ready to find out why Marie jokes are so popular.
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Funniest Marie Short Jokes
Short marie jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The marie humour may include short maria jokes also.
- I ate at Mary Poppin's Restaurant last night... Super cauliflower cheese but the lobster was atrocious
- When Mary had a baby boy, the wise men weren't surprised... ...but you should have seen their eyes when she had the little lamb.
- Knock Knock Knock knock
Who's there?
Mary.
Mary who?
Mary Christmas!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Anna.
Anna who?
Anna happy new year!
Merry Christmas and a happy new year, Reddit :) - Pierre Curie walks into his lab and says to his wife: "Marie, everyday you look more radiant." [could be a repost]
- So there's this girl named Mary... 1. Mary meets a guy named Joseph
2. Mary ends up pregnant
3. ???
4. Prophet - My 16 year old cousin Mary finally got her period today. So, that was a tense couple of years for me.
- My grandpa once told me he dated Marie Curie. He was attracted to her glowing spirit and radiant personality.
Sadly, their relationship became toxic. - Biblical Parenting Techniques Joseph: What should we do about Jesus acting up in school?
Mary: I don't know it's not like raising the Son of God came with Emmanuel - Why were Mary and Joseph considered such good businessmen? Because they produced such a great prophet.
- A bar owner walks up to his bartender… and asks him, hey, are you sleeping with Mary the waitress?
The bartender says no, I'm not
The owner then replies, good, you fire her
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Marie One Liners
Which marie one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with marie? I can suggest the ones about virgin mary and marie name.
- If Mary gave birth to Jesus and Jesus is the lamb of God... Did Mary have a little lamb?
- What's the difference between Mariah Carey and Marie Curie? One glitters, the other glows
- How did Mary Poppins die? Superkalifragilus ketoacidosis
- Jesus Christ was supposed to be named Franklin.... Until Mary stubbed her toe.
- What is Marie Curie's favorite food? Fission chips.
- Why did the crossdresser love Christmas? He could eat drink and be Mary
- Why did Mary become rich after giving birth to Jesus? She made a prophet!
- There's a new movie out about Marie Curie. It received glowing reviews.
- Why did Mary and Joseph's WIFI get hacked? Because Jesus WEPt.
- Marie Curie is my favorite scientist of all time. She was absolutely radiant.
- Where did Mary go when the bombs went off? Everywhere.
- What does Spiderman like to get high on? mary jane
- How did Mary know that Jesus weighed 7 lbs 6 oz? Because there was a weigh in the manger.
- What did Jesus do when Mary Magdalene tracked dirt through the house? Jesus swept.
- Marie-Antoinette heard of the starving karma farmers of reddit Let them have cake day
Marie Name Jokes
Here is a list of funny marie name jokes and even better marie name puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I was born Mary Patterson... but then I married and, naturally, I took my husbands name. So now I'm Neil Patterson.
From "A Bit of Fry and Laurie" - I work for a company that legally changes names A woman named Tina came in the other day and I was really impressed. I'm gonna Mary her
(it's my cake day... take er easy) - I really love the names Chloe, Mary, and Lydia, but I couldn't choose my favourite when my daughter was born So I combined them and got Chlamydia. It's just so catchy!
- Mary's father has 5 daughters,
1. Nana
2. Nono
3. Nini
4. Nene
What is the fifth daughters name? - Mary has is from a family with 5 sisters. The eldest sisters' name is Twa, second is Twe, third is Twi, the fourth is Two. What's the 5th sisters name? Twu. Mary is a dude.
- What was the Mother Mary's last name? Christmas.
- Hey man need some help here. Gotta a problem with my girl Mary's ex. His name Joe.. You know someone that could help me take care of this problem? Yeah, I Noah guy...
- During confession I told my priest I'd been shooting up a designer drug called "Jesus Christ". He said "Ten Hail Mary's. Thou shalt not take god's name in vein."
- What did the trans lesbian woman say to the person in charge of name changes? Will you Mary me?
- What do you call an Asian substitute teacher named Marie? The Yellow Sub Marie.
Marie Antoinette Jokes
Here is a list of funny marie antoinette jokes and even better marie antoinette puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- To think, Louis and Marie-Antoinette almost won the French Revolution. They were neck and neck.
- Ever seen the play about the French Revolution? The scene with Marie Antoinette was perfectly executed.
- Let them eat Cake Marie Antoinette started the body positivity movement. Quite revolutionary.
- How are Marie Antoinette, Princess Peach, and GLaDOS alike? They all lie about there being cake.
- Marie Antoinette was surprised when she found out how she was being executed Her Face dropped
- Why did Marie Antoinette travel the world? Where else would she beheaded?
- What did Mary Antoinette say on this day in history? Let them eat cake day!
- What did Marie Antoinette say on my Reddit anniversary? Let them eat cake day!
- What do you call Marie Antoinette's hot tub? A J'accuse!-i
- You know Marie Antoinette killed Humpty Dumpty at his own wedding? She made a French toast

Comical Marie Jokes to Spread Joy and Laughter
What funny jokes about marie you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean pilot jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make marie pranks.
Little Johnny
"Hey, Mom," asked Johnny "Can you give me twenty dollars?"
"Certainly not."
"If you do," he went on, "I'll tell you what dad said to the maid when you were at the beauty shop."
His mother's ears perked up and, grabbing her purse, she handed over the money. "Well? What did he say?"
"He said, 'Hey, Marie, make sure you wash my socks tomorrow.' "
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two women meet over a coffee.
"Ah, Marie, I haven't seen you in years, what's going on in your life?"
"I have met a charming and well-off young man half my age."
"Majestic."
"Indeed. He took me to Paris, we dined in the finest restaurant, bought paintings from the vernissage!"
"Majestic!"
"Once we marry, he insists that I retire to our moderately sized European house, free to pursue my leisure activities."
"Definitely majestic!"
"But enough about me. Tell me about yourself, Annette. What are you up to lately?"
"I signed for an etiquette class. We've already learned to say 'majestic' instead of 'fucking h**...'"
Why Marie Curie won two Nobel Prizes?
Because she was very rad.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So, apparently, Marie Antoinette was really good at o**... s**......
In fact, the entire Third Estate wanted her head!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man is on a blind date with a girl named Marie and things heat up a little...
He asks her, "Would you object to s**...?"
Marie tells him, a little embarrassed, "That's something I've never done."
With this he says, "Really? I've never had s**... with a v**...."
Marie replies, "No, silly! I never object."
What do you call a house that organizes your stuff?
Marie Condo.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Little known fact: after their supposed death, Pierre and Marie Curie went on to become successful underwater assassins using a certain heavy metal.
Hundreds of people died of mer-Curie poisoning.
What is Marie Curie's favorite movie?
It's A Wonderful Half-Life
What do Marie Curies Notebooks and a defected KGB agent have in common?
They both won't be investigated very closely.
What was Marie Curie's favourite drink?
Radioactivitea
Menopause
I'm going to bed with a frozen turkey and tomorrow I will wake up to thanksgiving dinner
Anita Marie Echevarria Cynical Comic
