Manufacturing Companies Jokes
19 manufacturing companies jokes and hilarious manufacturing companies puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about manufacturing companies that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Manufacturing Companies Short Jokes
Short manufacturing companies jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The manufacturing companies humour may include short manufacturing jokes also.
- My best friend tried to hide his drug dealing through a fake tobacco company and glass manufacturer. It was all just smoke and mirrors.
- I rode an elevator today manufactured by a company named Schindler I was on Schindler's Lift.
- What do you call a new mitten manufacturing company formed by a U.S. senator? Bernie's Handers.
- Making 6 figures a year sounds like a dream come true... Unless you work for an action figure manufacturing company. Then it sounds like a quick way to the unemployment line.
- Sarah Jessica Parker was asked if she supported the company that manufactures the Epi-pen. She replied: "Nay"
- According to the Bible, what company was the first car manufacturer? Honda. Because Jesus and his apostles were in one accord.
- Did you hear about the jeans manufacturing company that changed their product to pants made from one piece of fabric? They made a seamless transition.
- What did the Solid Surface countertop say to the Stone countertop? Hey! Don't take me for granite!
I work at a countertop manufacturing company. Thought of this on break earlier. 😃 - will chinese company ever decide to manufacture their product in the United States?Give reason...?
- There's a company that lets people manufacture their own very durable neckwear with the help of experts. They make strong ties with their costumers.
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Manufacturing Companies One Liners
Which manufacturing companies one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with manufacturing companies? I can suggest the ones about tech companies and company.
- What do you call a fast food company that also manufactures airliners? McDonald's Douglas
Manufacturing Companies Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about manufacturing companies you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean industrial jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make manufacturing companies pranks.
Jewish ad campaign
Old man Moskowitz was getting along in years. He decided to retire and let his 3 sons run the company (which manufactured a wide variety of nails). The sons thought they could increase market-share with some judicious billboard advertising.
Only a week later the old man was taking his usual Sunday drive in the country when he saw the first billboard ad. There it was - a picture of Christ on the Cross, with the caption: "Nails for Every Purpose. Use Moskowitz Nails."
The old man immediately met with his 3 sons to voice his concern. He explained that the backlash could be horrendous. The company could be ruined. The sons agreed to discontinue that ad.
A week later the old man was again taking his usual Sunday drive when he saw the second billboard ad. There it was - - a picture of the same cross, empty, with Christ crumpled on the ground below... and the caption: "Next Time Use Moskowitz Nails."
I was on a trip to Dubai, and in my stay, I met a rich man
Over time, we actually became friends, and he told me about this shoes company he owns.
He said:
Each pair of shoes we manufacture costs us about 2$, and we manage to sell them for 250$
What?! this is insane, why is it so expensive, ? I asked
Well I actually tried to make them cheaper for 25$ each
Then what happend?
People stopped buying them
A start-up company was deciding over something to manufacture
Something local that wouldn't cost much.
They figured filtered water would fit this category.
After running it through all the bodies of the company, they decided on making bread. The water market was oversaturated.
The Seattle Harbor Enterprise, or SHE, is embroiled in another lawsuit....
They have been charged with illegally surveiling the employees of a net manufacturing company and even tracking them to their homesand even emailing them during non work hours.
So the employees got together and pooled up enough money to raise a lawsuit against the the org for their wrongful actions.
The event is being called the:
"Sue SHE fish net stalking case"
How did the scalpel manufacturing company describe their latest research project?
Cutting edge.
An internal auditor for a manufacturing group was concerned about anomalies in stock levels.
He thought someone might be pinching stock but he couldn't prove it.
He had his eye on one shifty-looking individual who every day drove his old truck out of the factory with the load covered by a tarpaulin.
Time after time the auditor stopped the bloke, made him remove the tarpaulin and then inspected the load.
On every occasion, there was only scrap metal in the truck which the driver said he was taking to the tip.
On three occasions the auditor made the bloke remove the tarpaulin and then unload the scrap in front of him, suspecting that there might be stolen stock hidden underneath.
Nothing.
He could never find anything amiss.
After a few months of this, the auditor was offered a better job elsewhere and resigned.
A few weeks later he was drinking in a pub when the shifty character walked in. On an impulse, the auditor went up to him and said, "Look, I've left the company, I'm not interested in taking it any further and I won't stop you, but I just have to know. What were you taking?"
And the bloke said "Tarpaulins."
A manufacturing plant was in full swing one day.
The company's massive machine was humming along, taking in the raw materials at one end and churning out the finished product at the other.
All of a sudden, the machine stopped and ground to a halt.
Workers climbed all over it like ants to get it started again.
The plant's manager stormed out of his office to find out why his multi-million- dollar machine wasn't making him any money.
He listened to his people saying they couldn't figure it out, and he told them to call a technician.
Soon a tech arrived, and the manager frantically explained to him that he needed his machine back as soon as possible.
The technician listened patiently, took one look at the massive hulk of motionless metal, and immediately walked over to a small panel, opening a tiny door inside to see a screw.
The technician took a screwdriver and turned the screw one-quarter turn to the right, and the machine suddenly came back to life as if nothing was wrong.
The manager hurried over to thank the technician, shook his hand, and asked what he owed him for saving his company.
The technician answered, "$100,000.00".
The manager looked at him and said, "You were here less than two minutes and just turned one screw. How can you charge so much? Give me an itemised bill."
The technician calmly wrote out on a piece of paper:
-Turning of one screw: $1.00.
-Knowing which screw to turn: $99,999.00.