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Manic Depression Jokes

16 manic depression jokes and hilarious manic depression puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about manic depression that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Manic Depression Short Jokes

Short manic depression jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The manic depression humour may include short depression jokes also.

  1. Hulk Hogan: Doc, I had to struggle through manic-depression all my career! Therapist: Are you saying you had to wrestle mania?
  2. Travel advisory: Polar bears visiting the South Pole have been reporting extreme manic depression. It's not easy being bipolar.
  3. Why did the Earth suddenly enter a manic episode then go back to a depressive episode? Because it's bipolar.

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Manic Depression One Liners

Which manic depression one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with manic depression? I can suggest the ones about bipolar disorder and bipolar.

  1. How do you know a manic depressive girl loves you? She hates you.
  2. What animal is prone to both manic and depressive episodes? A bipolar bear.
  3. What do you call a hairy gay guy with manic depression? A bipolar bear
  4. A man with manic depression buys a heart rate monitor It was made by Polar
  5. Why did the manic depressive cross the freeway? To get to the *other side*

Manic Depression joke, Why did the manic depressive cross the freeway?

Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful Manic Depression Jokes

What funny jokes about manic depression you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mental illness jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make manic depression pranks.

Basic Psychology

The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and was giving an o**... test. Speaking specifically about manic depression, she asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?"

A young man in the rear raised his hand and answered, "A basketball coach?"

Mental health hotline.

Hello, welcome to the mental health hotline.
If you have obsessive compulsive disorder, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personality syndrome, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you suffer from paranoid schizophrenia, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transfered to the mothership.
If you are hearing voices, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which button you press. No one will answer anyway.
If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696.
If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the pound button until a representative comes on the line.
If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's and grandmother's maiden names.
If you have post traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 911.
If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep. Or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short term memory loss, please try you call again in a few minutes.
If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our representatives are busy.

The answering protocol for the psychiatric hotline.

Hello. Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.
If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5 and 6.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press. No-one will answer.

Manic Depression joke, The answering protocol for the psychiatric hotline.

jokes about manic depression