The Best 25 Maniac Jokes
Following is our collection of funniest Maniac jokes. There are some maniac insane jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these maniac obsessive puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Funny Maniac Jokes and Puns
Politics is like driving
No matter which lane you're in, anyone moving faster than you is a maniac and anyone going slower is a moron.
Mr Snail was always being teased by the insects
for being so slow. Eventually, he just couldn't take it anymore and went to the nearest car dealership.
"I want the fastest sports car you have," he told the salesman, "and make sure to paint a huge 'S' on it, so everyone will know its Mr Snail's car!"
So now, every time Mr Snail drives past the insects, speeding like a maniac, all the insects look and say: "Wow, look at that 'S' car go!"
A wife calls her husband driving to work
and says, "Honey be careful. There's a maniac driving on the wrong side of the road on the highway."
He responds, "One maniac? There are hundreds of them."
A man is yelling "People, listen to me! I am the son of Satan!" out of the window of a mental asylum.
Another one sticks his head out and yells:
"Don't listen to him, he's a maniac! I don't have a son!"
An elderly couple is taking a Sunday drive on I-80
when the wife gets a call on her new-fangled cell-phone. Her daughter is frantic, "Mom, there is a lunatic driving the wrong way down the road on I-80 near your house!"
The wife turns to her husband and says, "Did you hear that? Some maniac is driving down the wrong side of the road!"
The husband screams, "One lunatic?! There are hundreds of them!"
A Man's Biggest Hope
Most men hope they will marry a nymphomaniac.
The problem is, that after a few years, the nympho leaves but the maniac is still there.
Why did the maniacal chemist drop a rancher into his latest concoction?
Because the rancher was a cattlist.
Never marry a nymphomaniac
Because after a few years, the nympho leaves but the maniac doesn't
Studies show that owning a ladder is 10 times more dangerous than owning a gun.
That's why I own 10 guns. In case some maniac trys to come at me with a ladder.
Did you hear about the guy who got caught stealing electric guitars?
He was a Clapton maniac.
A maniac is on the loose after stabbing 6 people with a knitting needle...
Early reports from the police suggest he is following some kind of pattern...
You can explore maniac frenzy reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean maniac strangle dad jokes. There are also maniac puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
There was a maniac in town earlier today threatening to splash passersby with acid.
Thankfully, police managed to neutralise him.
I heard over the radio there was a maniac on the loose!
I got so scared I almost missed the pedestrians!
I married a nymphomaniac. Now after 5 years of marriage, the nympho is gone.
And I'm left with the maniac.
I called my wife to tell her to be careful because the news said some maniac was driving down the wrong side of the interstate.
She said it's worse than that, there's hundreds of them.
You know, studies show that keeping a ladder inside the house is more dangerous than a loaded gun.
That's why I own ten guns. In case some maniac tries to sneak in a ladder!
^(Source: Gravity Falls. Can't find a good clip of the moment)
old man gets a call from his wife
wife: "stay off the highway. I'm watching the news and there's a maniac driving into oncoming traffic!"
old man: "it's worse than you think! I see hundreds of them!"
What do you call a team-up between a maniac, a random white guy, and the head of the Vatican?
Snapped, Cracker and Pope
As a man drives on the hiwhway he hears some emergency news on the radio
"There is a maniac on the highway driving on the opposite direction. Be very careful" the radio says.
To which the man responds
"Just one? Don't they see?? All them are driving in the wrong direction".
What do you call a gay serial killer
A Homocidal Maniac
All men want to marry a nymphomaniac...
Problem is, after a few years the nympho leaves and the maniac stays
I'd love to meet the maniac that looked at a beehive
And thought, "I bet there's some nice food in there".
How many parents does it take to raise a homicidal maniac?
Two, then one, then none
Every married man thinks hes married a nymphomaniac before he was married
Then after a few years the nympho disappears and just leaves the maniac
Every guy likes to think he's marrying a nymphomaniac..
Then after the honeymoon, the nympho leaves and the maniac stays.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the maniac fanatic jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working maniac madness piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.