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Manhattan Jokes

57 manhattan jokes and hilarious manhattan puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about manhattan that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Want to get a laugh out of friends and family? Check out these hilarious Manhattan jokes. These take the Manhattan drink, Manhattan Project, and other New York related topics and improve them with clever wordplay. With these jokes on the shelf, you'll be sure to grab the attention of any crowd.

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Funniest Manhattan Short Jokes

Short manhattan jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The manhattan humour may include short avenue jokes also.

  1. New York City has a new cocktail commemorating Ida. It's just a Manhattan, but watered down. #WayTooSoon
  2. Have you heard of the new drink that they're calling the hurricane Sandy?... Yeah.. apparently it's just a watered down Manhattan.
  3. A peephole was found drilled into the wall of a women's locker room in a gym in Manhattan. ...........The police are looking into it.
  4. Remember Hurricane Sandy that hit New York a couple years ago? They made a mixed drink after it It's pretty much a watered down manhattan
  5. Hurricane Sandy I asked my bartender for a Hurricane Sandy. She looked confused and asked, "What is that?"
    I replied, "A watered down Manhattan."
  6. A man walks into a bar and orders a Manhattan. The drink comes and he sees a piece of parsley floating in the glass.
    "What in the world is this?"
    The bartender says, "Central Park."
  7. TIL the word Manhattan means island of many hills in the language of the original inhabitants and the hills were leveled as the city evolved. I guess you could say it was man-flattened.
  8. So bartenders are starting to make a drink called the "Hurricane Sandy"... Essentially, it's a just a watered-down Manhattan.
  9. An Asian man decides to move to Manhattan to start a business, but when he gets to New York there are no high rise buildings. Where is he? Rong Island.
  10. In history class we got to read on a WW2 topic of our choice. I chose the Manhattan Project. I heard it was the bomb.

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Manhattan One Liners

Which manhattan one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with manhattan? I can suggest the ones about manhattan drink and affordable.

  1. There's a new drink called the Sandy It's a watered down Manhattan.
  2. What's a baker's favorite part of Manhattan? The Lower Yeast Side.
  3. I really like the Manhattan Project It's the bomb.
  4. New data: in Manhattan, a pedestrian is hit by a car every ten minutes ... poor guy!
  5. Mixologists, bartenders, how to make a smoky manhattan? You fly a plane into the WTC
  6. They made a mixed drink after Hurricane Sandy It's pretty much a watered down Manhattan
  7. A woman walks into a Bar and orders a Manhattan she just needed a free ride home
  8. What do maids in Manhattan use to clean their kitchens? J-lo Cloths
  9. What be a pirates favorite way across Manhattan? An R to the C
  10. I'd like to open a Greek sandwich shop in Lower Manhattan. I'll call it Ground Gyro.
  11. Where do people in New York go to get a tan? Manhattan
  12. What did two twins name a towing company started in lower Manhattan? The Twin Towers.
  13. yo momma so fat her shadow engulfs all of manhattan
  14. New mixed drink: Hurricane Sandy Don't buy it. It's just a watered down Manhattan.
  15. What was o**... Bin Laden's favorite drink? A double Manhattan on the rocks.

Manhattan Drink Jokes

Here is a list of funny manhattan drink jokes and even better manhattan drink puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • "A new Indian casino opened up just down the street." "Don't bother going."
    "Oh? How come?"
    "Their drinks are too expensive. I heard they were charging 24 dollars for a Manhattan.
  • A new drink [n**...?] Some bars are serving this new drink called the "Hurricane Sandy". It's nothing special, really. It's just a watered down Manhattan.

Manhattan Project Jokes

Here is a list of funny manhattan project jokes and even better manhattan project puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • My dad works on Nukes and told me this today What dessert was served during the Manhattan Project?
    Yellow Cake
  • The Manhattan Project was an urban development program It was designed to make city populations explode
Manhattan joke, The Manhattan Project was an urban development program

Manhattan joke, The Manhattan Project was an urban development program

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about manhattan can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of manhattan puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

The Funniest Manhattan Jokes for a Bone-Shaking Laugh

What funny jokes about manhattan you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean cab jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make manhattan prank.

(AP) New York - A baby delivered without eyelids had surgery today at Mount Sinai Hospital in Manhattan, NY. Doctors successfully removed the child's f**... and were able to use the tissue to successfully form eyelids. Doctors said the child will be fine.

Just a little cockeyed.

The hurricane Sandy.

A guy goes to a bar and looks at the drink menu to see if he can try a new cocktail that he never had before. He noticed there is a drink on the menu named "Hurricane Sandy." The guy never heard of it before so he asks the bartender what is it. The bartender replied "It's a watered down Manhattan."

I'm getting tired of riding to work from New Jersey to Manhattan with my neighbors

I guess I'm getting Carpool Tunnel syndrome

Uber dressed up some of their vehicles as Star Wars Stormtroopers in Manhattan...

I wouldn't mind riding one of those. They won't hit anything.

Have you tried that new cocktail called Hurricane Sandy?

It's just a watered down Manhattan.

Why do differentiating mathematicians prefer Manhattans to Mojitos?

Ryes over r**....

ALL THE g**... ON AN ISLAND

My brother hates gay people -- hates us. 'We should take all you g**... and stick you on an island.' 'Well they have, Frank. We call it Manhattan.'

A man has just been arrested for stealing several Teslas in the Manhattan area

Mr T Edison has yet to be sentenced

Bank robbery suspect

A bank in Manhattan was robbed by a n**... woman yesterday.
"It is likely she'll never be caught" said Police "No one could remember her face."

A man was trying to subdivide a large piece of property he owned in Manhattan.

But no matter how many ways he tried, he was unable to split it up into any number of equal sized parcels. He asked a realtor if she could help, but the realtor said there was simply no way to do it.
The problem, she said, is that's a piece of prime real estate.

A s**... offender, creep and a billionaire walk into a Manhattan bar

The bartender says
Wow Mr Epstein what'll it be.

If they made the first version of the car for Knight Rider in Manhattan while listening to Frank Sinatra's New York, New York, they might have had confidence in their ability to build another, elsewhere. After all...

If you can make Kit there, you can make Kit anywhere.

Donald Trump was walking through Manhattan and saw a long queue. Wondering what is was for, he joined it.

People would look over their shoulder, see that is was Donald Trump behind them, and leave the queue, so he would proceed closer and closer to the front.
As he was getting closer to the head of the queue, he asked o**..., who also looked and was about to walk away, "Wait a second, what is this queue for and why are you now leaving it?"
The man said "This is the queue for Canadian Immigration Visas, but if you are getting one, I don't need one now."

Time Traveler

A time traveler shows up in Manhattan and asks the nearest person what year it is. The person responds, 2023 of course.
The time traveler looks up at the sky and mumbles, Ah yes, the first year of the Balloon Wars.

Manhattan joke, Time Traveler

jokes about manhattan

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these manhattan jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.