The Best 17 Manchester United Jokes

Following is our collection of funniest Manchester United jokes. There are some manchester united barcelona jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these manchester united southwest puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny Manchester United Jokes and Puns

What's the difference between a triangle and Manchester United ?

A triangle has three points

Teacher : Do you know the reason Manchester United lost to Arsenal ?

Student : Manchester United lost because their defenders were Young, Small and Blind

I've just been arrested by police investigating match fixing.

They executed search warrants at my home and office, seized my computer, laptop and mobile phone, and froze my bank account.

All I did was go into my local bookies and put a £5 bet on Manchester United to win.

Manchester United joke, I've just been arrested by police investigating match fixing.

3 soccer players, one plays for Manchester United, one for Liverpool and one for Arsenal, are lost in the desert.

They come across a dead camel and are having trouble deciding who gets what? So the guy from Manchester says, well since I'm from ManCHESTer, i'll get the chest. The player from Liverpool goes, well in that case I'll eat the LIVER. Then guy from ARSEnal says...i'm not hungry....

Why did..

Q : Why did Manchester United go to Stamford Bridge?
A : Four Nothing


*David Beckham* gets in a taxi at Dublin airport.

He notices the driver staring at him insistently in the rearview mirror.

After 5 minutes the taxi driver asks, Ok. At least give me a hint"

David Beckham sighs and says I had a brilliant career at Manchester United, married one of the Spice Girls and played for more than 100 times for England's national team. Enough?"

Driver replies: No, you eejit! Where are we going??

What is next best apple product for manchester united fans

Ibra

Manchester United joke, What is next best apple product for manchester united fans

I tired to make a joke about Manchester United's Munich Air Disaster.

But it didn't land well.

Manchester United were playing a match

Their manager was Jose Mourinho.

Hahahahaha.

When Manchester United played last night....

I was happy with only one man. Only Juan.

whats a feminist least favorite football team?

MANchester united

You can explore manchester united layover reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean manchester united york dad jokes. There are also manchester united puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Sportsnet (*&(*World Now Match Manchester United vs Tottenham live soccer

manchester united vs hull city live discussion

I'm writing a rebuttal for a coming inter-class debate and planning to use Manchester United's defence as an analogy, but my teacher says it doesn't even stand a chance.

I'm writing a rebuttal for a coming inter-class debate and planning to use Manchester United's defence as an analogy, but my teacher says it doesn't even stand a chance.
I'm now confused...

What does Prince Andrew, Manchester United & the black eyed peas have in Common?

It all went to shit when fergie left.

If Manchester United was a women's team, what would it have been called?

Womenbreaster Divided

Manchester United joke, If Manchester United was a women's team, what would it have been called?

A student went to class late, so the teacher asked him, "Why are you late?"

He told her, "I was dreaming of a Manchester United football match."

But that did not make any sense for the teacher so she ask, "Still why are you late?"

He answered, "Because there was extra time."

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the manchester united toronto jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working manchester united airliner piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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