Managers Jokes

Following is our collection of cfo puns and management lesson one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Managers jokes for adults, dirty director jokes and clean applicants dad gags for kids.

The Best Managers Puns

Due to the recent cutbacks caused by the coronavirus Bruce was told he had to terminate one of his compliance managers.

Alice and Jack we're both exemplary employees and he honestly had no idea which one he would get rid of, but being an honest man he decided he'd speak to them both ahead of time thinking that it might help him make his decision. He called in Alice first and he said listen, I've either got to lay you or Jack off. Without batting an eye she responded "you better jack off, I have a terrible headache."

Volta and Ampere interview for the same job.

After the interviews, the managers concur - although Ampere's qualifications are current, Volta is the only one who has potential.

I feel bad for all the nice women named Karen who have to deal with the bad stereotype of asking for managers. Sharon's too..

Because Sharon is Karen

What do schizophrenic Karens do for a living?

They are managers.

A South African actor walks into his managers office (original joke)

Looking for a job. His manager thinks about it and says "we only have one role available at the moment, it's a short film about segregation"
The actor replies "great, that sounds like a-part-heid take"

How many project managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Trick question. They can't actually do it. But they can record what percentage is complete.

At the company meeting, one of the managers came up with an idea.

- I think we should stop testing our products on animals, it's giving our brand a bad rep.

The CEO says:
- How come? The shampoo companies do it all the time!

- I understand, but, sir, we sell hammers.

How many Project managers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, they are all still discussing the best way to do it.

Telemarketers don't have managers

They have ring leaders

Project Manager Humor

Why do Vampires make poor project managers?

Because the refuse you to meet with stake holders.

(why yes, I am a dad why do you ask?)

Why are social media managers on sick leave so often?

Because they easily get viral.

Why do managers like pizza?

It comes out of the box

Two managers negotiated to swap their players for a trade.

Cleveland Cavaliers agreed to trade JR Smith for keeping the ball to Liverpool FC for Loris Karius for passing the ball.

Called to my managers office today

He said "you can't wear pyjamas to work you idiot!"

I replied " everyone else does though"


What do you call the tabletop for investment fund managers?

Warhammer 401(k)

Good managers, bad managers.

Good managers help their staff learn to succeed.

Bad ones force their staff to learn to Excel.

Man Utd managers are here today,

gone toMourinho.

I got a job at the post office the other day

But I got fired after a few hours. I don't know why, I followed the managers orders to the letter.

Business coach: remember, career ladder is like driving a bicycle.

If it's hard, then u go up.

One of the managers to himself: then whole my life i was riding without a saddle and off road.

There is an abundance of manage jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 19 funniest jokes and managers puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any facilities witze you can hear about managers.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes