The Best 19 Man Language Jokes

Following is our collection of funniest Man Language jokes. There are some man language tells jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these man language immediately puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny Man Language Jokes and Puns

I try to tell this joke in english :]

There's a young boy, with no arms, nor legs called Lumpi.
Lumpi plays in front of his house in the sandbox, then a window opens on the 4th floor and Lumpi's mother yells at him "Lumpi time to eat!" and she throws down a rope.
As Lumpi sees the rope hanging out of his window, he starts to rob to the rope and bite's it! He trained hard to hold himself on the rope with his teeth. Lumpi is very hungry and starts to pull himself up only with his teeth. Lumpi pulls and pulls, he's on the 1st floor, the window opens and a young Lady smiles at him, Lumpi smiles back, then pulls again...and again, 2nd floor the window opens and an old man sees him and waves at him, Lumpi shakes his head to greet back, then he start's to pull himself up again. Lumpi, all sweaty and hungry now on the the 3rd floor, near his own window on the 4th floor. The window on the 3rd floor opens and a Lady sees him, then she says "Hi Lumpi! What are you going to eat now?" and Lumpi replies " Pizaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!...."

Sry for my bad english, I just tried to tell a joke in english that I know in my own language. :)

Two british men are sitting at a bus stop...

When a man, clearly not from their town, comes up towards them.

"Parlez-vous Français?" The man asks the two Brits.

Confused, they stare blankly at the foreigner.

"Hablan ustedes EspaΓ±ol?" The man tries again - still no reaction from the two men.

Frustrated, the foreigner tries one more time.

"Sprechen sie Deutsch?"

but the two men at the bus stop still have no clue what he's saying, and the foreigner storms off in a huff.

A couple seconds later, one of the men sitting on the bench turns to the other and says, "We should probably learn a language."

The other man turns to him and says, "Why? He knew three, and it didn't do him any good!"

Two nuns sare coming back from the market late at night

- "Sister Andrea, it's already dark and we are still quite fare from the covent"

- "Yes Sister Dulce and did you notice that a man is following us??"

- "Yes! and what do you think he wants ?"

- "logical, rapes us... what should we do??"

- "logical: we split way, you on the left me on the right"

The man starts following Sister Dulce. Sister Andrea arrives to the Covent, and is worried because Sister Dulce is not arrived yet. After 1 hour here she comes.

- "What happened??"

- "Well I started running and obviously as did the man"

- "and??"

- "Logical: he reached me.."

- "Oh dear god! And what did you do??"

- "Logical: I lifted my dress up"

- "And what did he do??"

- "Logical: He dropped his pants"

- "god.... and??"

- "Logical no? A nun with her dressed up runs faster than a man with his pants down"

ps: Sorry my english is not my first language :)

A woman decides to call her friend in a foreign language while waiting in line at a grocery store.

When she finishes, a racist American man gets annoyed.

The man says, "You have to speak English in God's forsaken land of America! If you want to speak Spanish, go back to Mexico!"

The woman says, "I was speaking Navajo. If you want to speak English, go back to England."

An Englishman is walking through a hotel

An Englishman is walking through a hotel in the USA and says to a man, "please hold the lift!"

The man replies, "it's an elevator."

"No, no, no, it's a lift" the Englishman retorts.

"Listen, we invented the elevator in America, therefore, it's an elevator, plain and simple."

"Ah, yes" says the Englishman, "but we invented the language."


Sentences

A man is at a bar and says, "did you know that 'I am' is he shortest sentence in the English language?"

The bartender exclaims, "Did you know 'I do' is the longest one?"

(Was in the comics today so I thought I would share.)

Languages

Q: What do you call a man who speaks 2 languages?

A: Bilingual.

Q: What do you call a man who speaks 3 languages?

A: Trilingual.

Q: What do you call a man who speaks only one language?

A: An Englishman.

Learning English

So a man and his wife decided to speak in English at home to improve their language skills.

Her: Hunney, I'm going to rest a little bit.

Him: Sure hunney, rest in peace.

A neighbor's wife knocks on the door

She says "Your kids can't play with our children any more."
"Why?" the man asks, shocked.
"They keeping on calling the other kids gay, you should watch your language around them!"
The man replies "They couldn't have learned it from me, otherwise they would have been calling them faggots"

A man is at a job interview

The interviewer goes over his cv and says: "I see that you speak 14 languages, including Esperanto?"
"Yeah", the man says, "I used to live there for a while."

The year is 1945...

The Soviet army is pushing closer to Berlin with each day. As they march closer, they start to find the concentration camps. In one of these camps, a Polish man with a limited knowledge of the Russian language is talking to Russian military officers about the camps, with assistance from a translator. As he explains, he reaches a word he doesn't know, and turns to the translator.

"How do you say civilians?"

"Acceptable casualties."

You can explore man language walks reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean man language aback dad jokes. There are also man language puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


TIL the word Manhattan means island of many hills in the language of the original inhabitants and the hills were leveled as the city evolved.

I guess you could say it was man-flattened.

A man walks into a buffet...

He puts a sausage on his plate, and his German friend says "now you're speaking my language!".

Then, he adds a slice of pizza to his plate, and his Italian friend says "now you're speaking my language!".

Then, the man has an incredible urge to sneeze. He reaches for a napkin and raises it up, and his French friend says "now you're speaking my language!".

Did you hear about the famous microbiologist who traveled to dozens of countries and learned to speak several languages?

He was a man of many cultures.

A Chinese man, who was less than proficient in the English language files for divorce. The judge asks what is the reason?

He replies " me no come, she no come, but baby come, how come?".

Oh

What did the Frenchman say to the Spanish man?
How am i supposed to know i dont speak either of the languages.

[Translated joke from my native language] The medicine man

I rat-a-tat-tat on the door.
What is this? Which person is this rat-a-tat-tatting on my door?
It is I, the medicine man.
Which medicine man are you referring to?
Yes, correctness.

A British man was talking to his friend about his views on Brexit...

"These bloody immigrants come over here. They're up to no good, right? I hate these bloody immigrants. They need to go back to where they came from."


His friend replies with "But why do you hate them so much?"


The British man replies, "I'll tell you why I hate them, I'll tell you why. It's because they're not even trying to be British. That's why. They don't even TRY to be British. They come here, and bring their own bloody culture. They bring their own food, spit their own bloody languages, try to take over the whole bloody place."

His friend replies with "Well, that sounds British to me"

My grandad used to say "If it wasn't for me, you'd all be speaking German right now"

Lovely man, terribly bad foreign language teacher. No idea why the school hired him.


Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the man language visibly jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working man language sees piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes