The Best 48 Mammal Jokes
Following is our collection of funniest Mammal jokes. There are some mammal panda jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these mammal animal puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Funny Mammal Jokes and Puns
The difference
What is the difference between a portuguese woman and a sea lion ?
One of them has shiny bodyhair and smells like cod, the other one is a mammal that lives in the sea.
I need your best jokes about mammals. Can you guys help me out?
I need a good, clean, short joke about a mammal. I know this is an odd request, but maybe some of you will enjoy the challenge, or maybe you have some good ones you're just waiting to share. Let me have em.
What's the difference between a blue whale and your mother?
One is the largest known mammal on earth, the other is a blue whale.
New Bovine Discovered!
Deep in the heart of the Amazon, we have just discovered a new type of Bovine mammal. Named after the place where they were discovered, the gully bulls make their home in the bottom of a chasm. This Sar Chasm as it is known to the locals, was carved out of the bedrock by the river at the bottom. The gully bulls live at the bottom and their drool feeds the river that turns the wheel that powers the Internet.
What do you call a sea mammal with a mission?
A porpoise.
Did you hear about the beaver who went to the bar but forgot his wallet because he'd just shape-shifted from another water mammal?
He says to the bartender "I must've left it in my otter pants."
A panda walks into a bar
sits down and asks the bartender for food. after eating, gets up, takes out a gun and kills the bartender. as he is leaving, a shocked onlooker asks him "why did you do that?" and he answers "Hey. I'm a Panda. It's what I do."
in confusion, they look it up in an encyclopedia.
Panda. Mammal. Eats shoots and leaves.
What do you call a white haired mammal from the North pole who immigrates to the South pole in search of sexual enlightenment?
A bi-polar bear.
Where do you find a man with an aquatic mammal fetish?
In Wales.
A joke my 4 year old came up with today...
Him: "What's the only mammal that can breathe under water?"
Me: "I dunno, what?"
Him (loudly): "An elephant sticking his trunk up!"
What's the only mammal that can breathe under ice?
An elephant hiding in your fridge
You can explore mammal marsupial reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean mammal distinct dad jokes. There are also mammal puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
My wife is as graceful as a sea mammal in the water
What?like a dolphin?
No more like a manatees
What did the large furry mammal say when the salamander who kept asking for favors went too far?
I can't bear it! You axolotl of me this time!
Why will you never see a Mexican and an aquatic mammal in the same acappella group?
You can only have Juan sing or the otter.
A panda walks into a bar...
And eats some beer nuts, he then pulls out a gun fires it in the air heads for the door. "Hey!" shouts the bartender and the panda yells back "I'm a panda google me" and sure enough 'panda: a tree climbing mammal with distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves.'
What do you call a thug Australian mammal?
a gang-aroo
I love February because it contains two of my favorite annual events
Groundhog Day, and the State of the Union Address.
One involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a notoriously unreliable mammal for prognostication with no basis in reality. The other involves a groundhog.
What you call a healthy, large aquatic mammal living in a structure that gives access to ground water that is located west of England?
A well Welsh well whale
What do you call a gender-fluid arctic mammal with anger issues?
A bi-polar bear!
What's the similarity between a joke and a small, cute, furry mammal?
They both die when dissected
What do you call an anti-Semitic sea mammal?
Adolfin.
What do you say to a small mammal facing a challenging task?
Gofer it!
What was the first modern mammal to live in sub-Saharan Africa?
The hipsterpotamus
I've never caught a sea mammal
My life is without porpoise
What do you call the largest mammal on earth that lives in a palace? (not mine)
The Prince of Wales
What's the difference between a flying mammal in sunglasses and a mouse in disguise?
One's a rad bat, the other's a bad rat
for an organism to be classified as a mammal, they have to have hair and produce milk
by that logic, a coconut is a mammal
Whats the largest mammal on land?
A beached whale
I attached a picture of a marine mammal to my graphite stick.
It's a penseal
What do you get when you cross a blind burrowing mammal with a Roman demigod?
Molecules
What do you call an evil mammal that spews nonsense out it's blowhole ?
Adolfin
What's the most massive mammal?
A higgs bison.
What's the difference between a hedgehog and a goldfish?
One is a land mammal and one is a fish
Here's a pretty good joke about your pet marine mammal having sex in an auto parts store.
Your welcome in advance.
A retired policeman decides to get into aquatic mammal identification.
Whale whale whale, what do we have here then?
Hitler never really killed himself. He transformed into an aquatic mammal-
-a-dolph-in
The reason that nobody has ever seen the Easter bunny is because they're looking for a rabbit. The Easter bunny is a marsupial, it has to be. Its a mammal that lays eggs.
Dolphins are the second smartest mammal behind man.
That puts women in third.
What do you call the largest mammal on Earth that lives in a palace?
The Prince of Wales!
Saw this old joke and thought the Brits would enjoy it.
What do you call a large, grey, water-dwelling mammal from Africa that swears a lot?
A hippopottymouth
TIL the Mars rover Opportunity found a small mammal on the planet that appeared to be related to the opossum.
Unfortunately, the rover Spirit had run over it the day before.
Which mammal is known to spend most of it's life in air but gives birth on land?
Student : Air Hostess
What cheese do you use to coax a large mammal out of a cave?
Camembert.
Angle: so what your saying is you want me to put hair on the outside, and milk on the inside?
God: yep
Angel: ...OH! Well if you wanted me to make another mammal then why didn-
God: Nope
Angel: Wait what?
God: were making coconuts.
Q: What is a large mammal that lives in swamps and shouts obscenities at passers by?
A: The hippopottymouth
Source: friend's kid
What's the difference between a hippo, a zippo, and a stick of glue?
One is a heavy mammal and one is a little lighter.
I'm so sad since my pet marine mammal died.
It's like my life has no porpoise anymore.
My friend said he saw a nocturnal mammal defecate in a French River
I told him that's bat shit in Seine
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the mammal creature jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working mammal carnivore piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.