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Maker Jokes

121 maker jokes and hilarious maker puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about maker that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Bringing together the best of cabinet-maker, label-maker, trouble-maker, coffee-maker, and sandwich-maker, these hilarious jokes will have even the most experienced inventor smiling. From timepieces to graf and more, these stellar maker jokes will have you giggling all day.

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Funniest Maker Short Jokes

Short maker jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The maker humour may include short creator jokes also.

  1. My granddad always used to say, As one door closes another one opens. Lovely man.
    Terrible cabinet maker.
  2. My Grandad always said, As one door closes, another one opens. Lovely man, terrible cabinet maker.
  3. Instead of water, I put redbull in the the back of my coffee maker this morning I was halfway to work before I realized I forgot my car.
  4. My granddad always used to say, "as one door closes another one opens" Wonderful guy, terrible cabinet maker.
  5. Slightly peeved that the makers of the shampoo "Head and Shoulders"... …have not followed up with a bodywash called, "Knees and toes."
  6. My grandpa used to say: "When one door closes, another one opens". He was a lovely man, but a terrible cabinet maker.
  7. As companies continue to cut tie with Kanye West... Compass maker INMARK has also decided to drop West from their product line, leaving users lost and confused.
  8. My grandfather once told me, "When one door closes, another one opens." Lovely man, terrible cabinet maker.
  9. My sister is an expert pastry-maker. She has to be to stay employed, her job has a high turnover rate.
  10. 50Cent says Trump offered him $500,000 to join presidential campaign Only Trump would pay $500k for $0.50
    Such a deal maker.

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Maker One Liners

Which maker one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with maker? I can suggest the ones about producer and craft.

  1. She was only a whiskey-maker's daughter but he loved her still.
  2. Why are pizza makers always poor? Because they knead dough to make a living.
  3. What do you call a fast clothes maker? Taylor Swift!
    Made up by my nine year old :)
  4. What does the Jewish potion maker do at work? Hebrew
  5. What do you say to an overworked clothing maker? You seamstressed.
  6. I just got a futuristic coffee maker. It was a ground-breaking development.
  7. If athletes get athlete's foot, what do candy makers get? Tic tac toe
  8. Coffee maker in the IT department doesn't work Try reinstalling java.
  9. Wanna know why I don't like pancake makers ? Because they give me the crepes
  10. What was built after the Indian sandwich maker's shop burned down? A New Delhi
  11. She was just a humble whiskey maker. He loved her still.
  12. Why did the calendar maker get fired from his job? He took a day off
  13. What did the clone-maker name his company? W
    Think a little hard you'll get it...
  14. Why did the Italian cheese maker join a dating app? He was provolonely.
  15. They arrested the overweight soap maker Apparently he was a big fat lyer.

Coffee Maker Jokes

Here is a list of funny coffee maker jokes and even better coffee maker puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • My wife told me that before I come to bed, she'd like me to start the dishwasher, set the coffee maker, and bring her some water. I said, "Ok, but I'm bound to forget one of those two things."
  • Wife: "Why is this giant bra on the coffee maker?" Husband: "You said you needed k cups."
  • When I was a kid, I goofed around with my dad's coffee maker before he got done cleaning it. I managed to get myself grounded.
  • I tried washing my coffee maker today Now I'm no longer allowed in Starbucks unless the barista has the restraining order removed.
  • What do you call a Finnish coffee maker? A perkele-tor!
  • What was the last thing that went through the bug's mind before he splatted against the car's windshield? "Did I turn off the coffee maker?"
  • I think they should engineer a coffee maker that tells you jokes as it's brewing. I'm sure it would cause a brew-ha-ha.
  • How do you make a coffee maker cry? With a very dark roast.
  • Chuck Norris doesn't use a coffee maker, he puts the coffee beans in his mouth and boils them with his rage.
  • What kind of coffee maker did a French reporter's wife buy him? A French Press.

Sandwich Maker Jokes

Here is a list of funny sandwich maker jokes and even better sandwich maker puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I am a sandwich maker at subway, but i'm not very good at my job. AMA! Wrong sub, my bad
  • What is a Vietnamese sandwich maker's favorite pick up line? Banh mi.
  • Bill Clinton was surprised to find his old sandwich maker is ahead 12 points in the polls.
  • What does a stripper and a Subway sandwich maker have in common? They both prefer to be called "artists" instead of what they really are.
  • Why can't Bill Clinton find his sandwich maker? She's in Florida.
  • I ordered a brand-new sandwich maker online. Her name is Svetlana.
  • What do you call a woman with... No legs? A stationary sandwich maker
    No arms? A walking cook book
    No tongue? A silent vacuum cleaner
  • Do you know what March 8 is? International sandwich makers day.
  • What did the card player say to the sandwich maker? One two? Nah, [go] fish!
  • What do you call lesbian sandwich-makers with spray tans? Jersey d**....
Maker joke, What do you call lesbian sandwich-makers with spray tans?

Cabinet Maker Jokes

Here is a list of funny cabinet maker jokes and even better cabinet maker puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I used to sell office supplies to the mafia, file cabinets and label makers and such I was involved in very organized crime

Label Maker Jokes

Here is a list of funny label maker jokes and even better label maker puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Instead of working out, I'm just going to get a label maker. I'll label my scale "1-10", then every time I step on it I'll be reminded that on a scale of 1-10, I'm a 220.
  • My office has had three label makers stolen in the past week. We suspect it's connected to organized crime.
  • Roommate: Where did you put the label maker? Me: In the drawer labelled s**...-stuff

Trouble Maker Jokes

Here is a list of funny trouble maker jokes and even better trouble maker puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • George ohm is a real trouble maker I mean who else gets arrested for resisting as much as he does?
Maker joke, George ohm is a real trouble maker

Uplifting Maker Jokes to have Hilarious Fun with Friends

What funny jokes about maker you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean firm jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make maker pranks.

A group of revolutionaries hired a Swiss watch maker to build a clock that would chime when the overthrow began.

And the worlds first Coup Coup Clock was born...

Appliances

My wife has made me buy an electric bread maker, electric stove, electric blender, electric toaster and other appliances. Now she's complaining that we have too many appliances and nowhere to sit down. So I bought her an electric chair.

What did the bread maker say to the wheat?

I loave you.

Pinocchio has been getting complaints from his girlfriend....

Pinnochio had been getting complaints from his girlfriend. "Every time we make love," she said, "I get splinters. "
So
Pinocchio went back to his maker, Gipetto the carpenter, for advice.
"Sandpaper," said the carpenter. "That's what you need. " So
Pinocchio took some sheets of sandpaper and went home. A few weeks later the carpenter bumped into Pinocchio again. "How are you getting on with the girls now? " he asked. "Who needs girls? " said
Pinocchio."

A Rabbi's money maker.

A man asks a Rabbi if he gets paid for the circumcisions. The Rabbi says
- No, I can't do that! I just Keep the tips!

Why did the woman marry the shoe maker?

Because she was his sole mate.

An Emergency Call Centre operator has been fired...

An Emergency Call Centre operator has been fired in Bradford
It seems that a caller dialed 999 from a mobile phone stating, "I am depressed and lying on a railway line so that when the train comes I can finally meet my maker."
To which the call centre employee replied, "Remain calm and stay on the line."

What did the cheese maker say when he found out his dairy supply spoiled?

That's not Gouda.

What is that thing, which the maker cannot use, and the user cannot see?

Coffin

Why did the butter maker not tell anybody his secret recipe?

He was afraid they'd spread it around.

A coffin maker was on his way to deliver a coffin

...when his car broke down. Trying not to be late he put the coffin on his head and began heading to his destination.
A policeman saw him, told him to stop and asked, "Hey what are you carrying and where are you going?"
The man replied,
"I do not like where I was buried so I am relocating."....
The policeman fainted.

Did you hear about the m**... of the door maker?

The police said it was an open and shut case.

What did the German clock maker say to the broken clock?

Ve haff vays of making you tock!

Why did the cheese maker not enjoy the movie?


Not much Gouda

What did the cheese maker say when his vat got dumped to the floor?

That's no gouda

The makers of Pedia-Lite are making emory boards for kids.

They call them Pedia-Files.

Did the depressed rope maker succeed?

Sadly, he did knot.

Two guys walk into a sandwich shop...

The 1st guy says, "I'll take the BLT on sourdough, please."
"One BLT coming right up!" Says the sandwich maker.
The second guy looks at the sandwich maker and says "I'll have a Donald Trump."
Confused, the sandwich maker asks, "A Donald Trump, what's that?"
In which the the second guy replies, "all white bread, a bunch of bologna and a little pickle."

What's the difference between a middle school flute player and a dress maker

Dress makers tuck up frills

A man walks up to a German clock maker

The man tells him, "My clock just goes tik, tik, tik, it never goes tok!"
The German clock maker holds a flashlight up to the clock and yells "VE HAVE VAYS OF MAKING YOU TOK!"

Did you hear about the kilt maker that went to prison?

He had quite the chequered past.

I was on the phone with my wife and said, "I'm almost home, honey, please put the coffee maker on."

After a twenty second pause, I asked, "You still there sweetheart?"
"Yeah," she replied, "…but I don't think the coffee maker wants to talk right now…"

The ice maker in the fridge was blocked by a large chunk of ice and wouldn't operate.

It was found guilty of obstruction of just ice.

Did you hear about the dress maker who went to the ATM?

She was electrocuted when she put in her pin.

She was only a lowly moonshine maker...

But he loved her still.

Why did the boat maker from France have so many allies?

He was great at building French ships.

I was browsing Craigslist the other day, when I came across someone who wanted to learn how to make macaroni.

Being a master macaroni maker myself, I responded to his offer, and we set up a time and place to meet so I could teach him. When we met up, he took one look at me, and he told me that I didn't look like someone who could even make halfway decent macaroni. "Sir", I assured him, "I promise I'm a master of my Kraft."

None of my clients liked me when I was a plumber...

But since becoming a coffin maker, they've been dying to see me

Have you heard about the m**... diorama maker?

He just came on the scene.

Pulling back the f**... should have a better name

Unsheathing the baby maker, for example

What do you call a Vegan with diarrhea?

A smoothie maker!

What does a Jewish beer maker do?

He brews

I got fired from my job as a stencil maker.

I guess it just wasn't cut out for me.

Why couldn't the pasta maker get into his apartment?

Because he had gnocchi.

Why was the protein powder maker never satisfied with his work?

He always kept looking for new wheys to improve

Why shouldn't you let a shoe maker use your bathroom?

They'll clog your toilet.

I once asked a cheese maker if there was any way he could make me a block of cheddar using soy milk.

Hey said, "I'm sorry, but there's no whey."

What did the pizza maker say before robbing a bank?

"I may love making pizza, but I still knead the dough."

Archimedes wasn't just known for inventing his many inventions. He's also considered to have invented the first insult when talking to his brother who was a cheese maker after discovering a early form of lindburger cheese....

He simply stated, You reeka!

Audi's are more expensive than they have to be.

The German luxury car maker could sell much cheaper cars if they stopped shipping them with all those extra accessories that the owners never use anyways, like rear view mirrors, turn signals, side-view mirrors...

I met a wine maker that wouldn't give my money back when I told him he'd given me the wrong vintage.

It was the vintner of my discontent

A man is on a tour of the Yankee Candle Factory

A man was taking a tour of the Yankee Candle factory when he suddenly saw an incredibly large machine and had no idea what it was. he asked the employee giving the tour what it was, and the employee replied, Oh! That's our patented Yankee Candle Maker 5000™️! The man seemed content and said to himself, Oh, that makes scents.

A Buddhist priest walks into a pizzeria...

The pizza maker asks the priest what can I get for you?
The Buddhist, in a quiet voice, replies, can you make me one with everything?

Did you hear about the pasta maker that was locked out of his house?

It was because he had Gnocchi.

I met an anarchist ice cream maker

Some men just want to watch the world churn.

In honour of my first cake day, here's a few of my favourite riddles. Feel free to try them on your friends.

Q: What gets bigger, the more you take away from it?
A: A hole
Q: What two words have thousands of letters in them?
A: Post office
Q: The maker doesn't want it, the buyer doesn't use it and the user doesn't see it. What is it?
A: A coffin
Q: What travels all over the world, but stays in the corner?
A: A stamp
Q: What runs all around a field, but doesn't move?
A: A fence
Q: What starts with E, ends with e and only has one letter in it?
A: Envelope

My friend got a job at the power plant.

He now refers to his occupation as a ohm maker

A Subway sandwich maker has a very eccentric regular customer.

The eccentric customer always orders a tuna sandwich, but heavily modified, made with an extra cup of mayo, smothered in chili peppers, red peppers, onions, and pickles, then toasted until it's burnt. It looks and smells disgusting and the worker dreads it when he sees that customer come in.
Finally he asks his boss if he can just not wait on that customer. His boss asks why.
The worker screams in frustration: "I hate the mods on that sub!"

Don't ever challenge a German sausage maker to a competition.

It brings out the *wurst* in him.

What's the difference between a Viking and that one Bond movie where he's in space?

One's *Moonraker*, the other's a rune maker.

TIL In 1836 a San Antonio pie maker fought with Mexican dairy farmers who tried to serve their pie with a newly developed frozen dairy product. While the pie maker ultimately lost, their valiant struggle is brought to mind any time people declare,

"Remember the à la mode"

There was a mohel who had the odd habit of keeping the foreskins in a box in a closet.

One day he noticed that they'd naturally tanned into very supple leather, so he took the boxful to a bag maker, to see if anything could be done with them. The craftsman told him to return in a month.
When he did, he was presented with a shaving kit.
"All of that leather, and this was all you could make of it?!"
"Well, it may be a shaving kit now, but if you rub it a bit, it becomes an overnight bag, and if you rub it a lot, it becomes a two-suiter."

A man dies and his three best friends, Matthew, Mark and James are looking at his body in the coffin.

Matthew says "He was such a good friend. I don't want him to go to his maker empty handed" and he throws $200 in cash into the coffin. Mark says he agrees and also throws in $200 in cash.
James says "You cheap-skates! I'm ashamed of you and I'm going to give him $1,000." He then writes out a check for $1,400, throws it in and takes the $400 in change out of the coffin.

Maker

A grandfather and granddaughter were sitting and talking when the young girl asked, "Did God make you, Grandpa?"
"Yes, God made me," the grandfather answered.
A few minutes later, the little girl asked him, "Did God make me too?"
"Yes, He did," the older man answered.
For a few minutes, the little girl seemed to be studying her
grandpa, as well as her own reflection in the mirror, while her
grandfather wondered what was running through her mind. At last she spoke up.
"You know, Grandpa," she said, "God's doing a lot better job
lately."

A man dies in the widow orders a wreath for the f**...

She opts for simple "Rest in Peace" writing on the ribbon but then after a while she starts thinking that it's too short. So she calls the wreath maker and orders "Please add "I'll see you in Heaven" if there is space left." Happy with herself she hangs up. Then at the f**... she sees the wreath with "Rest in Peace" on one ribbon and "I'll see you in Heaven, if there is any space left" on the other.

Maker joke, Why did the Italian cheese maker join a dating app?

jokes about maker