Major Jokes

Funniest Major Short Jokes

Short major jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The major humour may include short minor jokes also.

1. I spent four years at college and didn't learn anything... It's really my own fault. I had a double major in psychology and reverse psychology.
2. How do you tell the difference between an English major, a Math major, and a programmer? Ask them what "!" is
3. Breaking News: Local Kindergarten reports major Peek-a-Boo accident. All involved were rushed to the ICU
4. People should really stop making jokes about major tragedies. My Dad died on 9/11... He was the best pilot in Saudi Arabia...
5. A new study shows that the majority of humans alive today are better at math than Albert Einstein. Because he's dead.
6. What's the difference between a guy with an Arts Major, and a guy with a philosophy Major? One will ask WHY you want fries with that!
7. "Why is there a Women's Studies Major, but not a Men's Studies Major" "There is a Men's Studies major, its called history"
8. Camouflage training The sergeant-major growled at the young soldier, "I didn't see you at camouflage training this morning."
   "Thank you very much, sir."
9. I'm in love with a philosophy major, and she doesn't even know I exist and worse… she can prove it.
10. A week after the G7 Summit, they should have the C Major Summit That would resolve everything.

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Major One Liners

Which major one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with major? I can suggest the ones about principal and main.

1. How do you get an art major off your front porch? Pay for the pizza!
2. What math classes do gender studies majors take? Triggernometry
3. What starts with 'p' ends with 'orn' and plays a major role in the film industry? Popcorn
4. My psychiatrist and I had a major breakthrough. Now he can hear the voices too.
5. What was spider Man's major in college? Web Design.
6. My wife says that I only have 2 major faults I don't listen, and something else
7. What did the Arts Major say to the Business Major? "Can I take your order?"
8. Why are subway cooks called "Sandwich Artists"? Even art majors deserve recognition
9. My friends that majored in English always tell me the same thing Welcome to Starbucks!
10. What do you call it when computer science majors make fun of each other? Cyber boolean
11. What do you get if you drop a piano on a military base? A flat major.
12. To all the philosophy majors out there... Can I get a Grande Mocha with whip please?
13. Why don't Calculus majors throw house parties? Because you should never drink and derive.
14. What do Women's Studies majors like after dessert? A tip
15. I've decided on my college major! Agriculture. I've heard it's a very large field.

Art Major Jokes

Here is a list of funny art major jokes and even better art major puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I vandalized an art major's car today. Removing pizza delivery signs is surprisingly easy.
• What has four wheels and can't support a family? A liberal arts major.
  I lied about the wheels.
• What's the difference between an Art major and a guy who mops bathrooms at KFC? One has a job.
• An engineer major asks... "How can we build this?"
  A business major asks, "How can we finance this?"
  A liberal arts major asks, "Do you want fries with that?"
• What's the difference between a homeless person and an art major? About $4.32 in change.
• What's a Liberal Arts Major's Favorite Board Game?...... Trivial Pursuit.
• What did the Arts major say to the Science major? Do you want fries with that?
• What's the difference between a liberal arts major and a pizza? The pizza can feed a family.
• What do liberal arts majors yell when overwhelmed? Oh,the humanities!
• If you're a liberal arts major, here's a tip $5, and be glad it's 20%.

Philosophy Major Jokes

Here is a list of funny philosophy major jokes and even better philosophy major puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What's the difference between a philosophy major and a picnic table? A picnic table can support a family.
• I'm going to major in Philosophy when I go to college... ...so one day I can ask '*Why* do you want fries with that?'
• What's the difference between a social media influencer and a philosophy major? The philosophy major needed a degree to be useless.
• Greece announced they are going to default on their nearly 1.8 billion dollar loan Who would've thought the country that invented the philosophy major would be broke?
• It's fun being a philosophy major I get to reflect on why I can't pay for food
• What is the world's smallest book? Job listings for philosophy majors.
• Never date a philosophy major My last girlfriend was one and she spent most of her time trying to prove that I didn't exist
• What do you call a homeless college student? A philosophy major
• I had an arguement with a philosophy major I told him NO, I don't want avocado on my footlong!
• What kind of car do most philosophy majors drive? An uber.

English Major Jokes

Here is a list of funny english major jokes and even better english major puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• If a tree falls in the woods, and there are no English majors around to hear it... does is lay on the ground, or lie?
• It's sad to see people with MBA's ending up as McDonald's cashiers They're taking jobs from English majors.
• Computer Science major walks into an English class The Professor says "Welcome to English 101".
  The student panicks.
  "What's wrong?" asks the Professor.
  "I missed the first 4 English classes".
• What did the English major have after getting intestinal surgery? A semicolon
• If there's one thing my English major girlfriend has taught me, It's what a colon does.
• I don't understand why so many people major in English Literature. I mean there's only so many ways to ask, "Do you want fries with that?"
• Why did the English majors switch to Spanish? Too many persuasive esses.
• Why did the English major break up with the pilot? Because the pilot kept ending sentences with a preposition, over.
• What did the English major say to the Theatre major? Now my friend, we play the waiting game!
• Why do many latinos major in english? Because of all essays

Math Major Jokes

Here is a list of funny math major jokes and even better math major puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Always invite the math major to the party. They are a great addition.
• What happens to a math major when he flunks out of school? The aftermath
• I asked a math major freshman friend this morning, "So what's your four-year plan in college?" ohhh you mean my Four-Year Transform or Four-Year Series?
• Math majors have terrible grammar... How else can you explain them saying "pie are squared"?
• My friend just got his bachelors in mathematics and my GF just asked gf: "What's a common problem for a math major?"
  friend: "getting laid"
• What it is like to be a math major. The only thing I satisfy are equations.
• Did you hear about the statistics major who ended up homeless when they couldn't find a job after graduation? It was a real bad after-math.
• How does a math major travel west? √66
• what do you call two math majors guys who love football and are best friends? AlgeBros.

Business Major Jokes

Here is a list of funny business major jokes and even better business major puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I recently bought into a chain of restaurants well-known for their beef dishes I'm now a major steak holder in the business
• You can major in 5 things in college: science, engineering, business, nursing, or unemployment.
• Dolly Parton's made a major move into the grocery business... She bought the chains Piggly Wiggly, Giant and Harris Teeter, and is going to rename them "Giant Wiggly Teeters".
• What do you call a hippie with a business major? A Hippie-crite.
• Are you a psychology major? "No, I'm a business major."
  "Well, business is psychology..."

Gather Around for Fun Major Jokes and Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about major you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean important jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make major pranks.