Maiden Jokes
43 maiden jokes and hilarious maiden puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about maiden that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Enjoy an evening of laughter with these maiden jokes! From Iron Maiden to lasses to Ana and her stallion, there's something for everyone! Check out this collection of jokes sure to make you chuckle!
Quick Jump To
- Short Maiden Jokes
- Maiden One Liners
- Mother Maiden Jokes
- Maiden Voyage Jokes
- Iron Maiden Jokes
- More Maiden Jokes
Funniest Maiden Short Jokes
Short maiden jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The maiden humour may include short old maid jokes also.
- A good way to get to know your date is to ask about their first pet, favorite movie, and mom's maiden name.
Then login and read all their emails. - The Nigerian Government is now offering a $3m reward for the safe return of the missing girls. All you need to do is provide your name, address, date of birth, bank details and mother's maiden name.
- Melinda announces that she is keeping her married name after the divorce, not reverting to her maiden name. I guess that's what you call Gatekeeping
- A guy walks into a bar, and another guy says, "I slept with my wife before we were married. Did you?" The other guy says, "I don't know. What was her maiden name?
- Frank says to John: 'I never slept with my wife until we got married. What about you?' John: 'I'm not sure. What's her maiden name?'
- Two blokes are talking Two blokes are talking and one says " I slept with my wife before we were married, did you?" The other bloke said " I don't know, what was her maiden name?"
- Said the man to the maiden... Said the man to the maiden as the lay there by the see, "Shh, someone's coming!" Said the maiden, "Hush! It's me!"
- Buzz Aldrin's mother's maiden name was moon, so you could say that Buzz Aldrin's dad was the first man on moon
- The Titanic II is set to make its maiden voyage in 2022 At least they won't have to worry about icebergs, do to global warming.
- You know that fair maiden that Vincent van Gogh gave his ear to? I heard it was for the illustrious ghost, Mary the 1st of England.
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Maiden One Liners
Which maiden one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with maiden? I can suggest the ones about bride and goddess.
- What do you call an unmarried Chinese woman? Maiden China
- What's the Shah's favorite band? Iran Maiden
- I want to start an all Chinese, Iron Maiden cover band It'll be called Maiden China
- Why did the fair maiden enjoy the award? Because it was a Sir Prize.
- Why are cricket bowlers good with women? Every now and then, they bowl a maiden over
- A guy walks into a metal bar Iron Maiden was playing.
- Metalhead love What do you call 2 metalheads falling in love?
A match maiden heaven - Why are ships always called by a maidens name? Because they're full of s**....
Mother Maiden Jokes
Here is a list of funny mother maiden jokes and even better mother maiden puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- By asking 4 questions i can tell what your zodiac sign is 1. What's your favorite color?
2. What's your mother's maiden name?
3. What's your social security number?
4. What's your birthday? - I named my car parts factory after my mother's maiden name, and it was banned for being obscene. What's wrong with Sechso Fenders?
Maiden Voyage Jokes
Here is a list of funny maiden voyage jokes and even better maiden voyage puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I heard the Titanic II is going on its maiden voyage soon. No way I'd set foot on that thing. Miss me with that ship.
- Yo mama's so fat... when the bank asks you a security question they don't ask for her maiden name, they ask for the date of her maiden voyage
- p**... Training p**... training my toddler can be likened to the maiden voyage of the Titanic...
At the beginning we are hopeful and excited but by the end everyone's crying and wet.
Iron Maiden Jokes
Here is a list of funny iron maiden jokes and even better iron maiden puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My mom asked me why her name is listed as "Mom The Beast" on my my phone. I told her that that's what her number is by Iron Maiden.
- I was wondering why my iron maiden wasn't working. Then I read the text on the back:
"Maiden China"
Laughable Maiden Jokes for Instant Grins & Giggles
What funny jokes about maiden you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mistress jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make maiden pranks.
Premarital s**...
Two guys were discussing popular family trends on s**..., marriage, and values.
Dave said, "I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?"
Frank replied, "I'm not sure, what was her maiden name?
s**... BEFORE MARRIAGE
John: I didn't sleep with my wife before we were married. Did you?
Bob: I'm not sure. What was your wife's maiden name?
Two guys are drinking a beer and one states that he didn't have s**... with his wife before they were married.
"What about you?", he asked his buddy.
"I don't know." came the reply. "What was her maiden name?"
Password security questions for the depressed
What is the name of your least favorite child?
In what year did you abandon your dreams?
What is the maiden name of your father's mistress?
At what age did your childhood pet run away?
What was the name of your favorite unpaid internship?
In what city did you first experience ennui?
What is your ex-wife's newest last name?
What sports team do you fetishize to avoid meaningful discussion with others?
What is the name of your favorite canceled TV show?
What was the middle name of your first rebound?
On what street did you lose your childlike sense of wonder?
When did you stop trying?
Moral decline of the modern world
Two bishops were discussing the decline in morals in the modern world.
"I didn't sleep with my wife before I was married," said one clergyman self-righteously, "Did you?"
"I don't know," said the other. "What was her maiden name?"
After saving the universe from Thanos, Thor spent the night with a beautiful woman.
The next morning, Thor says, "Fair maiden, I must confess: I am Thor."
She replies, "*You're* Thor? I can hardly walk."
Two men are talking whilst having beers, 'Call me old fashioned but I didn't sleep with my wife until we were married' he says 'What about you?'
'I'm not sure to be honest' says the friend ' What was her maiden name?'
Thor was bored with life on Asgard and one day decided travel to earth to entertain himself.
Whilst here he happened upon a beautiful maiden and the pair hooked up that evening and made love all night, with Thor slipping out in the early hours.
Back in Asgard Thor felt bad for the fair lady about slipping away never too be seen again and thought he at least owed it to her to explain things - so he made his way back to earth to find her.
He bumps into her again. "Hi' he states 'I think I should explain - I'm Thor"
"*I'm Thor"?!* The lady retorted, "I can hardly thit down!"
Two Baptist ministers were eating lunch when one went on and on about young people having s**... before marriage. He said, God forbids it. It is a sin and I didn't have s**... with my wife until our wedding night. How about you?
The other minister thinks and then says, I don't think so, what was her maiden name?
My Grandfather saw the Titanic. He shouted loudly to all within earshot "that ship is going to sink!". He was ignored. But he kept it up "Mark my words. That ship will sink on her maiden voyage!"
Eventually the ushers threw him out of the theater.
Real Middle-aged Texting.
Man: "Fair maiden, wherest doth thou reside on this fair evening?"
Woman: "Good sir, I am trapped within the reside of mine parents"
Man: "Oh, mine love, how I wish mineself were trapped in thine reside so I could bury my face deep within thine bossom."
Woman: "Mine parents shall rest in the hour next. Upon that time, I shall make mine escape, and help you polish your sword."
Man: "Mine sword shall stand in waiting for thine touch."
Two Southern Baptist ministers are having lunch
And as they often do, they start ranting about the immorality found in society. One of them starts ranting about pre-marital s**.... "It's a sin, I tell you, all of these young kids having relations outside the holy covenant of marriage. Well, I can tell you one thing, I didn't have s**... with my wife before we were married - how about you?"
The other minister thinks for a second and says "I don't think so - what was her maiden name?"
"I didn't have s**... with my wife until after we were married. Did you?"
"I don't know. What's her maiden name?"
Two old dudes are sitting on a park bench discussing their youth and how things have changed. One says to the other one, "these days there is premarital s**..., extramarital s**..., swinging... I never had premarital s**... with my wife, did you?"
The other thinks for a moment and says "What was her maiden name again?"
A guy walked into a ... No wait, he was already there...
...and he said to the bartender, "I slept with my wife before we were married. Did you do that too?" And the bartender said, "I don't know. What was her maiden name?"
Two men were having a drink together.
One says I had s**... with my wife before we were married. What about you? I don't know, says the other. What was her maiden name?
