Madman Jokes
16 madman jokes and hilarious madman puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about madman that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Madman Short Jokes
Short madman jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The madman humour may include short maniac jokes also.
- A Spanish madman recently bombed a train station... Everybody's saying he had loco motives.
- I told a psychiatric ward patient to stand in the middle of two black poles ... and he did it ! The absolute madman!
- Did you hear about the knife-wielding madman who attacked a circus camp the other day? He went straight for the juggler.
- Trump's best joke to date: "I won't rule out direct talks with Kim Jong Un. I just won't"
...
"As far as the risk of dealing with a madman is concerned, that's his problem, not mine,
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Madman One Liners
Which madman one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with madman? I can suggest the ones about bad man and madness.
- So I told my friend to drink v**..., and he actually did it. the Absolut madman.
- What kind of person disables adblock? A madman.
Quirky and Hilarious Madman Jokes to Let the Chuckles Begin.
What funny jokes about madman you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mad scientist jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make madman pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A koala bear walks into a brothel picks out the best looking girl and heads upstairs with her.
While up there he eats her out like a madman doing things she's never even heard of.
After about an hour he gets up heads out the door.
The girl stops him and demands payment.
The bear doesn't understand. She has him look up p**... in the dictionary, a person who trades s**... for money. Still a little confused he asks what does it say about me.
Koala bear, an Australian native animal that eats bushes and leaves.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So this r**... in New York is getting mugged...
and he fights like a wildcat, but eventually the three toughs overcome him. Two hold him down while the third grabs his wallet and opens it.
"Ten dollars??!!? You fought like a madman for *15 minutes* for a lousy ten bucks?"
"Oh no!" replied the r**.... "I thought you were going after the $500 in my shoe!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man is standing on the Red Square in Moscow with a banner: "Death to the b**... madman"
Promptly, the police appears. "What, are you against our glorious leader Vladimir Putin?". And so the police beats him up.
"Wait, stop! I was protesting against Zelensky - the b**... madman!" - the man shouts as he is being dragged into the police car.
"Shut up, you. We all know who the b**... madman is here".
Wife asks her man a serious question one day...
It was a beautiful morning, however wife had a serious question to ask her husband.
"Babe", she reckoned. "If I die tomorrow, how will you be affected by my death?"
Husband did not question the intent behind asking such a question, indeed he was smart.
"Babe, if I lose you, I'll become a madman, I'd drive myself CRAZY !", he reckoned.
Feeling satisfied with his response, she further questioned, "So you wouldn't marry someone else once I'm gone is it?"
"I don't know babe, a CRAZY man could do anything", he replied.
Drunk driving
A drunk guy was driving home on the wrong side of the road. His wife saw the scene live on TV and in horror rushed to call him: "Hello?! Are you driving home? Be careful, there is a madman driving on the wrong side of the road!". He replies: "I know, there isn't only one, there are hundreds!".
Letter to a madman
Inside a hospice, a madman approaches the others with a blank paper, examining it with attention. The other crazy people can not resist curiosity and ask:
_ What is it?
The crazy one with the letter, responds
_ A letter from my brother
Even for the other crazy people, that was too absurd.
_ But the letter is blank.
The madman responds serenely
_ We do not talk anymore
The body of an homosexual, existentialist fugitive was found in a motel 2 years after the case went cold.
Across an entire wall the words "How do they know" were scrawled, surrounded by places and names connected by bits of string.
The police investigated this, but they couldn't decipher it beyond the ravings of a madman.
The body was found in front of a computer after people at the motel reported a gunshot early in the morning.
Apparently he had browsing 4chan. The police tried to figure out what drove him to kill himself by checking his browser history, but couldn't get any leads. It wasn't until they looked at the comments that they figured out what drove him mad.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
3 men in a plane, one with a knife, one with a gun and one with a bomb.
The plane was about to c**... so the pilot says we need to shed weight fast, you all need to chuck your luggage out. They comply. The plane stabilises and they land safely.
The guy that chucked the knife out the plane returns home and sees his mother sobbing. When he asks why she said "some madman chucked a knife from a plane and killed your father when he went to the toilet ". He remains silent.
The man with the gun decided to shed the bullets instead of the precious gun so he shot all his bullets. When he returns home he too sees his mother and crying and when he asks why she replys "some madman shot out of a plane and killed your father when he went to the toilet" he too remains silent.
The man that chucked the bomb out of the plane returns home and sees his mother laughing uncontrollably. When he asks why she said "your dad whent to the toilet, f**... and blew up the house"
