Luxurious Jokes

What are some Luxurious jokes?

My girlfriend and I could never agree on holidays...

I wanted to fly to exotic places and stay in luxurious five-star hotels. And she wanted to come with me.

The exchange student

A wealthy Arab had a son who was an exchange student in America. Because of his father's wealth, the son would arrive to school every day in a luxurious Rolls-Royce. Soon after school started, the son sent a letter to his father. It said "Dear father. I feel very ashamed; I arrive to school everyday in a Rolls-Royce. All my professors arrive by train!" he soon got a letter back from his father, along with $20 million. His father's letter read "Dear son, you are embarrassing me. Take this money and but yourself a train as well!"

Four men are talking...

They are talking about how rich their sons are. The first said: "My son is so rich last time he bought his lover a luxurious Mercedes" "That's nothing"- said the second-"mine bought his lover last time a luxurious yacht" "Well thats cute"-responded the third-"Mine bought his lover a luxurious 12000 square metre mansion"The fourth man responds: "Ya' know my son is very rich too but recently found out that he is homosexual" "Eww, how terrible is that"-react the other men-"How can you handle this?" "Oh, i handle it really well, and he is actually really success among men, from the last three lovers of him he recived Mercedes a yacht and a huge mansion...."

Praying and Sleeping

Two men arrive at the Pearly Gates at about the same time, both wanting to know if they will be admitted to heaven. St. Peter asks the first man his name, where he is from, and what he did in life.

The man answers that he is John Smith and that he was a taxi driver in New York City.

St. Peter looks through his book, then gives the man a luxurious silken robe and a golden staff, and bids him welcome into heaven for his eternal reward.

St. Peter then asks the second man the same questions. He replies that his name is Thomas O'Malley, and that he was a Catholic priest in Chicago. St. Peter looks in his book, then gives him a cotton robe and a wooden staff, and bids him to enter into heaven for his eternal reward.

Father O'Malley says, Wait a minute! Why did that taxi driver get a silken robe and golden staff while I, a Catholic Priest and a man of God, got a cotton robe and wooden staff?

St. Peter told him that the rewards in heaven are based on results, and while Father O'Malley preached, people slept, but while John Smith drove, people prayed!

So a man is sitting at a swanky bar on the penthouse of a luxurious skyscraper...

When he turns to the guy next to him and says "You know, way up this high, the air pressure is such that you could jump off the balcony and the wind would push you back up!"
The other man is incredulous, and asks the man to jump and prove it. To this the man says sure, and without hesitation heads over to the balcony and jumps off. Sure enough, a few feet down, he suddenly changes direction and swoops back up on to the balcony.
The man is impressed. "I gotta try this!" he says and leaps off the balcony. He goes straight down, and splats on the pavement below.
The bartender turns to the first man and says "Superman, you sure are a mean drunk."

A priest and a math teacher...

die and go to heaven at the same time. St. Peter greets them at the pearly gates, and then shows them to their accommodations. He brings the math teacher to a luxurious mansion, with a hedge maze, marble columns, and a fountain. The priest thinks to himself, "If the math teacher gets this, imagine what I might get!" So he follows St. Peter past a row of large houses, a row of suburban houses, a row of small houses, a row of houses for rent, a row of apartment complexes, and all the way to a row of tree-houses. St. Peter shows the priest to a small tree-house. The priest is baffled, and says, "WHAT!? The math teacher got a MANSION!"
St. Peter replies, "We grant houses based on the amount of people you get to pray, and the math teacher got more people to pray then you ever did."

A rich snail walks into a car dealership

The rich snail wants something fast, elegant, and luxurious, after browsing Mercedes, Ferraris, Bugattis, and tons of other high end cars he decides on one.

So the rich snail pays in cash and walks up to the dealerships auto body guy and says "I want you to paint big S's all the this car, big S's on the front, the sides, the back, the top, big S's everywhere. The auto body guy tells him he can do it sure, but can't help to ask the snail why he wants big S's all over the car.

So the rich snail answers him "so when I fly past people on the highway, they point and say

"WOW! Look at that S Car Go!!"

The prince didn't mind living in his father's luxurious house

but some days it was hard living in the chateau of his father

I have a lot of big dreams for my future, in 10 years I hope to see myself

in a larger, more luxurious mirror.

How to make Luxurious jokes?

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