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Lumber Jack Jokes

20 lumber jack jokes and hilarious lumber jack puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about lumber jack that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Lumber Jack Short Jokes

Short lumber jack jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The lumber jack humour may include short lumberjack jokes also.

  1. Q: what did one lumber jack say to another lumber jack? A: "I need to axe you a question."

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Lumber Jack One Liners

Which lumber jack one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with lumber jack? I can suggest the ones about lumberjack wood and lumber.

  1. What do you call a pig that's a lumber jack? Well you call him porkchop
  2. What did the choir girl say to the lumber jack? I love the timbre of your voice.
  3. What happened to the tree when the lumber jack hit on it? It got all sappy
  4. Who does the Queen of Hearts send to cut down a tree? The Lumber-Jack.
  5. What is a Lumber-Jack from Massachusetts' favorite drink? A Boston Logger.
  6. So a lumber jack was severely injured this evening... It was quite the accident.
  7. Q: Why did the lumber truck stop?
    A: To let the lumber j**....
  8. What do you call a M2F t**...? A lumber jack.

Quirky and Hilarious Lumber Jack Jokes to Let the Chuckles Begin.

What funny jokes about lumber jack you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean tree feller jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make lumber jack pranks.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

p**... needed a job

Shawn said why not try a lumber jack?
So off he went to the forman.
p**... he says if you can do 100 trees a day , you're hired.
Off p**... went, only 10 trees the 1st day.
Forman says, now p**..., i have guys who can do 100 without breaking a sweat.
p**... forgoes breakfast and lunch but only manages 20 trees on day 2.
Forman says, ow p**..., i have a guy who can do 150 before lunch!
p**... starts at 4am ,no food and finishes at 7pm exhausted.
Forman says now p**... , 30 trees?
p**... says, i don't know what i'm doing wrong?
Forman says, well lets see and he picks up the chainsaw and starts it up.
p**... goes : Whats that?"

There are three lumber jacks.

There is an Italian guy, a Polish guy, and a Chinese guy. The boss puts the Italian guy in charge of cutting down the trees, the Polish guy in charge of carrying the logs and the Chinese guy in charge of supplies. He tells the men he'll be back in a few hours to check on their progress. When he returns, the Italian guy is chopping the trees and the Polish guy is carrying the logs, but he can't find the Chinese guy. All he sees is a wall of boxes stacked up. As he walks towards the boxes, the Chinese guy jumps out from behind them and yells "SUPPLIES!"

I can't keep a steady job!

I worked in an orange juice factory but I got canned. I couldn't concentrate.
I worked in the woods as a lumber jack but I just couldn't hack it. They gave me the ax.
I worked as a tailor but I wasn't suited for it. Mainly because it was a sew-sew job.
I worked in a muffler factory but it was too exhausting.
I attempted to be a deli worker but any way I sliced it I couldn't cut the mustard.
I worked as a musician but I found out I wasn't note worthy.
I worked as a doctor but I didn't have any patience.
I became a professional fisherman but I found out I couldn't live on my net income.
I worked as a pool maintenance worker but it was too draining.
I worked at the zoo, feeding giraffes, but I wasn't up to it.
I worked as a historian but found out that there's no future in that.
I worked at Starbucks but I quit because it was always the same old grind.