Lowered Jokes
48 lowered jokes and hilarious lowered puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about lowered that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article discusses the humorous implications of driving a lowered car. It reveals the ironic contrast of its low stance versus the envious gazes it may receive from those who drive vehicles of a higher stature . Read on to find out how lowered cars can be the butt of a few jokes.
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Funniest Lowered Short Jokes
Short lowered jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The lowered humour may include short lowering jokes also.
- Condoms 1272AD - arab Muslims invent the first condoms using the lower intestine of goats.
1856AD - English farmers improve on the idea by first removing the intestine from the goat. - When the inventor of the USB dies... they'll gently lower the coffin, then pull it back up, turn it the other way, then lower it again.
- The inventor of the USB died. They lowered his coffin, raised it back out, flipped it over, lowered it again, raised it back out, flipped it over again, then lowered him again.
- Got home from work today to find my kids have been on ebay all day. If they are still there tomorrow I will lower the price.
- The reason for the wage gap is that men have high paying jobs like doctor, lawyer, etc. while women usually have lower paying jobs... ...like female doctor, female lawyer, etc.
- When the creator of USB drive will die, they'll lower his coffin into the ground.. ..take it out, flip it over and lower again.
- The guy who invented the USB connector died... They lowered the coffin into his grave.
Then they lifted it back out, turned it round, and lowered it back in again. - The only time my girl friend will ever scream "DEEPER, DEEPER"... ...is when they are lowering my casket into the ground!
- Condoms were invented by Arabic-Muslims sometime in the 1400s using lower goat intestine They were later improved by the British in 1873 by taking the intestine out of the goat first
- When I die... I want the people who I did group projects with to lower me into my grave so they can let me down one last time.
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Lowered One Liners
Which lowered one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with lowered? I can suggest the ones about lower than and dropped.
- What gets bigger the more you take from it? The lower class.
- Hey baby are you a Communist? Because i can feel an uprising in my lower class.
- Why does Batman leave his lower face visible? So cops can see that he's white
- Donald Trump walks into a bar ......
and set it lower - Hey girl is your name Karl Marx? Cuz you're starting an uprising in my lower classes
- Do Russians only write in lower case letters? I mean, they hate Capitalism.
- Why does Superman have a lower case "s" on his chest? Because not all heroes wear caps.
- Why do Soviets always write in lower-case? Because they hate Capitalism.
- do commies write everything in lower case? you know beacause they hate capitalism
- Why do Russians always use lower case letters? Because they hate capitalizing.
- Kim Kardashian, pitbull and Amy Schumer walk into a bar. They set it lower.
- i type everything in lower case because i don't give a shift
- Donald Trump walks into a bar He lowers it
- Me: What kind of dog you got? Him: Husky Me (in a lower voice): What kind of dog you got?
- Did you hear that Tom Brady is running for president? His platform is lowering inflation.
Lowered Car Jokes
Here is a list of funny lowered car jokes and even better lowered car puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I get self conscious about driving my lowered car at times. I feel like other motorists are always looking down on me.
- I got rid of my house, cars and credit cards to get my interest rates lower.. It worked! Now girls are barely interested in me..
(Heard it from somewhere on tv maybe) - If there's one good thing about the election of Trump, it's the greatly lowered odds of being attacked by Russia. After all, they're not going to key their own car.
Cheeky Lowered Jokes that Will Make You and Your Friends Chuckle
What funny jokes about lowered you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean lifted jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make lowered pranks.
The inventor of the USB stick has died
At his f**... they gently lowered the coffin, then pulled it back up, turned it the other way, then lowered it again.
What happened at the f**... of the man who invented the USB?
They lowered his coffin, took it out, flipped it the other way round, then lowered it again.
I was at the inventor of the USB stick's f**... yesterday.....
They lowered his coffin into the ground, then raised it back up, turned it around, and lowered it back down again.
Thought up this one in class today. (OC) "What did the one gravedigger say to the other as they lowered the body of a patronizing embezzler into his grave?"
"It's always nice to see a condescending con descending".
Did you hear the man who invented the USB port died?
At his f**... they lowered the casket....
Then raised it, turned it around, and lowered it again.
Cardiologist
A heart surgeon had died and at his funural the coffin was placed above a heart made of flowers. After everyone had said goodbye the coffin was lowered into the heart, during which someone began laughing really loud. 'What is wrong with you?' the person sitting next to the laughing man asked. 'I just thought of my own funural' he replied. 'What's so funny about that?' Still chuckling the man answered: 'Well, you see, I'm a gynaecologist'.
The man who invented USB died recently.
At the f**... they lowered his coffin down, brought it back up, turned it over and lowered it again
The creator of the USB flash drive died today.
He was lowered into his coffin, flipped over, and then lowered again.
After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date.
Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him on the phone so he would have an excuse to leave if something like this happened.
When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died."
"Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!"
A 100 year-old man goes to the doctor and says I need my s**... drive lowered!
The doctor replies I think it's all in your head.
The old mans exclaims That's the problem, I need it LOWER!
A parking warden was being buried.
As they lowered the coffin into the ground there was a frantic b**... from inside and shouts of I'M NOT DEAD! I'M NOT DEAD!
"Ah sorry mate" says the priest, leaning forward to the coffin. "It's too late, I've started filling in the paperwork"
A bald magician pulled a rabbit out of a hat. Then he put the rabbit right on top of his head and gently lowered the hat down over the rabbit until the rabbit was completely covered. After a couple seconds of wearing the hat, the magician quickly lifted the hat back up, and presto!
there wasn't a hare on his head
As the coffin was being lowered into the ground at a Traffic Warden's f**...,
a voice from inside screams: "I'm not dead, I'm not dead. Let me out!"
The Vicar smiles, leans forward s**... air through his teeth and mutters: "Too late pal, I've already done the paperwork."
Traffic accidents
A Frenchman and an Englishman are talking at a bar:
Frenchman: "Did you hear, in France they lowered the the amount of alcohol you can drink before driving. But now car accidents have significantly increased"
Englishman: " Wow, how can that be?"
Frenchman: " Well its because if a man drinks wine with a meal at a restaurant, his wife has to drive him home"
A coffin was being lowered into the ground at a Traffic Warden's f**......
A coffin was being lowered into the ground at a Traffic Warden's f**.... As it was being lowered, a voice from inside screams "I'm not dead! I'm not dead! Let me out." The vicar smiles, leans forward s**... air through his teeth and mutters "sorry mate, it's too late. I've already done the paperwork."
A drill sergeant was drilling the recruit squad in the use of the rifle
Everything went smoothly until blank cartridges were distributed.
The recruits were instructed to load their pieces and stand at the ready, and then the sergeant gave the command:
"Fire at will!"
Private Lunn was puzzled. He lowered his gun.
"Which one is Will?", he asked.
All these mega church pastors in the news getting caught with gay prostitutes is appalling
And has really lowered my opinion of male prostitutes.
Rising sea levels have lowered the value of my home.
Now my mortgage is underwater.
Logan Paul walked into a bar...
and lowered it.
A beautiful female student was in danger of flunking her middle-aged male professor's course
It was near the end of the semester and she came to class in a short skirt and low-cut top. After the other students left the classroom she approached the prof.
"You know, I'd do *anything* to pass this class," she said flirtatiously.
The professor lowered his voice and looked down his bifocals. "Really?" he said, "Anything?"
"Yes," she said seductively. "Anything."
The professor drew near and whispered in her ear. "Would you . . . study?"
Condescending
A midget convict was escaping out of a window, and as he lowered himself down I was walking past, and we made eye contact and he sneered at me and I thought "that's a little condescending". (Say it out loud)
I was minding my own business driving down the road the other day
when the car in front of me suddenly stopped and I went right up the back of it.
Then a dwarf got out of the driver's side and tapped on my window. As I lowered my window, he said "I am not happy."
I said "Which one are you then?"
I failed the high jump in gymnastics class today...
Ever since then the bar was lowered
The guy that invented/designed the USB plug died about a month ago.
At his f**... they lowered his coffin into the ground, then pulled it out and turned it around and put it back, then pulled it up again....
What did the priest say when Freddie Mercury was lowered into his grave?
"This is the cleanest hole he's ever been in"
Cardi B walked into a bar
And lowered it
