Lower Jokes
129 lower jokes and hilarious lower puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about lower that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Are you looking for an easy way to bring some laughter to your next dinner party or social gathering? Making lower jokes is a great way to do just that! Learn about the different kinds of lower than, lower back, lower class, lower lips and downward jokes, how to keep them safer and how to bring the laughter downstairs.
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Funniest Lower Short Jokes
Short lower jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The lower humour may include short higher jokes also.
- Condoms 1272AD - arab Muslims invent the first condoms using the lower intestine of goats.
1856AD - English farmers improve on the idea by first removing the intestine from the goat. - When the inventor of the USB dies... they'll gently lower the coffin, then pull it back up, turn it the other way, then lower it again.
- The inventor of the USB died. They lowered his coffin, raised it back out, flipped it over, lowered it again, raised it back out, flipped it over again, then lowered him again.
- Got home from work today to find my kids have been on ebay all day. If they are still there tomorrow I will lower the price.
- The reason for the wage gap is that men have high paying jobs like doctor, lawyer, etc. while women usually have lower paying jobs... ...like female doctor, female lawyer, etc.
- When the creator of USB drive will die, they'll lower his coffin into the ground.. ..take it out, flip it over and lower again.
- The guy who invented the USB connector died... They lowered the coffin into his grave.
Then they lifted it back out, turned it round, and lowered it back in again. - The only time my girl friend will ever scream "DEEPER, DEEPER"... ...is when they are lowering my casket into the ground!
- Condoms were invented by Arabic-Muslims sometime in the 1400s using lower goat intestine They were later improved by the British in 1873 by taking the intestine out of the goat first
- When I die... I want the people who I did group projects with to lower me into my grave so they can let me down one last time.
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Lower One Liners
Which lower one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with lower? I can suggest the ones about lowest and upper.
- What gets bigger the more you take from it? The lower class.
- Hey baby are you a Communist? Because i can feel an uprising in my lower class.
- Why does Batman leave his lower face visible? So cops can see that he's white
- Donald Trump walks into a bar ......
and set it lower - Hey girl is your name Karl Marx? Cuz you're starting an uprising in my lower classes
- Do Russians only write in lower case letters? I mean, they hate Capitalism.
- Why does Superman have a lower case "s" on his chest? Because not all heroes wear caps.
- Why do Soviets always write in lower-case? Because they hate Capitalism.
- do commies write everything in lower case? you know beacause they hate capitalism
- Why do Russians always use lower case letters? Because they hate capitalizing.
- Kim Kardashian, pitbull and Amy Schumer walk into a bar. They set it lower.
- i type everything in lower case because i don't give a shift
- Donald Trump walks into a bar He lowers it
- Me: What kind of dog you got? Him: Husky Me (in a lower voice): What kind of dog you got?
- Did you hear that Tom Brady is running for president? His platform is lowering inflation.
Lower Than Jokes
Here is a list of funny lower than jokes and even better lower than puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I went to an archaeologist's party where we were excavating a lower leg bone. It was quite the shindig.
- Got home from work and the kids had been on ebay all day If they're still there tomorrow I'll lower the price.
- My dad works for a company that focuses on the health of the lower 3/4 of the body, and yesterday he just became the CEO. Now he's the Head of Shoulders, Knees, and Toes!
- What do you call the facility where they make lower quality, but still acceptable, goods? The satisfactory.
- I bought a book on capitalism... but then returned it because some of the letters were in lower-case.
- What do you call a Jew with a pH lower than 7? ....hasidic
I'll let myself out now. I know that was matzo good... - The creator of the USB flash drive died today. He was lowered into his coffin, flipped over, and then lowered again.
- TIL the Earth produces global electromagnetic resonance with the highest peak frequency of 33.8Hz, slightly lower than a C#1 note with a frequency of 34.65Hz. I guess you can say the earth is flat.
- Why should communism always be lower case? So that it's not capitalized
- The US Senate walks into a bar And lowers it
Lower Back Jokes
Here is a list of funny lower back jokes and even better lower back puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I was having lower back pain from having to stand all day at work and my wife suggested I try orthopedic footwear. I told her it wouldn't help but she insisted.
I stand corrected. - What do you call that lever on a desk chair that adjusts lower back support? The Lumbar Jack
- The person who invented the USB drive is going to be lowered into his grave, Then lifted back up, flipped over, and played in again.
- TIFU: My wife told me she wants to get a tattoo on her lower back. I told her to get one of a beautiful young woman so I'd have something to fantasize about.
- The inventor of the USB stick has died At his f**... they gently lowered the coffin, then pulled it back up, turned it the other way, then lowered it again.
- I was at the inventor of the USB stick's f**... yesterday..... They lowered his coffin into the ground, then raised it back up, turned it around, and lowered it back down again.
- The man who invented USB died recently. At the f**... they lowered his coffin down, brought it back up, turned it over and lowered it again
Lower Class Jokes
Here is a list of funny lower class jokes and even better lower class puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Are you the Proletariat? Because I feel an uprising in my lower class.
- Hey girl are you a communist? Because I feel a rise in my lower class
- I failed the high jump in gymnastics class today... Ever since then the bar was lowered
- LOWERCASE IS FOR THE LOWER CLASS That is an example of a capitalist.
- Leftists are acting like Trump is going to assassinate journalists, kill all homosexuals, and steal everything he can from the lower class... Like he's a communist or something.
- How do you make "Malabu" a lower class word, instead of a high class word? Chevy Malabu
- The only Physics Problem which could not be solved by topper of the class is, Find the force required to LOWER THE BAR of mass (m) and length (l) which is at a height (h).
- A guy types "lower case is for the lower class people" someone else replies with "I guess that makes you a capitalist"
Lower Lips Jokes
Here is a list of funny lower lips jokes and even better lower lips puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- "I've been a naughty, naughty girl" she said to me, biting her lower lip, "and I need to be punished" So I installed Windows 10 on her laptop.
- It usually works when flirting, Bite your lip. P.S. Your lower lip.
- My girlfriend tried to look s**... by biting her lip She doesn't realize that she's supposed to bite her lower lip.
The Funniest Lower Jokes for a Bone-Shaking Laugh
What funny jokes about lower you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean greater jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make lower pranks.
Lower back problems
The other day, my friend and I were discussing Scarlett Johansson. I said: "I think she got breast reduction surgery." My friend asked why. I told him, "lower back problems." He looked shocked and indignant and said: "why didn't she get lower back surgery then?"
For everyone in the working world today: It's a Tuesday...
...which is like a Monday but with steel-toed boots and a slightly lower aim.
The Good Old Days!
Grandpa was always going on about the good old days, and the lower cost of living, in particular to his grandson.
"When I was a kid, my mom could send me to the store, and I'd get a salami, two pints of milk, 6 oranges, 2 loaves o' bread, a magazine, and some new blue jeans... all for a dollar!!
"Grandson, "You can't DO that anymore..... they got those darn video cameras everywhere you look."
What's a baker's favorite part of Manhattan?
The Lower Yeast Side.
Apple is trying to market its new iPod to the lower demographic with a newly named device ...
... however they decided "iTouch Kids" was not a good name.
Dr: "Mr Smith, your wife is comfortable."
Husband: "I thought she was in a coma and critical condition."
Dr: "She is, the nurses are using her as a beanbag."
c**... origins
Did you know the c**... was invented in a small village in wales in the 12th century. They thought it would be a good idea to use the lower intestine of a sheep to stop their wives becoming pregnant.
Of course, in the 1350's, the English improved on the idea. They took the lower intestine out of the sheep before they used it.
How to tell time in a forest
Here's how to tell time in a forest.
Try and face north, or make your best approximation as to which way is north. Stand straight and tall. Extend both arms so that they are parallel with the ground. Lower your left arm back down to your side. Bend your right arm so that your hand is against the left side of your chest. Now lower your chin to your chest and look at your watch.
How do you know your s**... partner works in IT?
They insist your safe word has an upper case letter, a lower case letter, and at least one number.
I have a Pakistani girl friend.
Last night she said that she wanted to blow me. Now I wasn't sure if I should lower my pants or call the cops.
Hillary Clinton has a seizure during the debate...
"Mrs. Clinton," the Moderator asks, "What is your plan to lower the national debt?"
Suddenly, Hillary flails her arms around, rolls her eyes wildly, foams at the mouth, and gibbers incoherently for several awkward minutes. Finally, she collapses in a heap and soils herself.
"Hey!" Trump interrupts, "Is she allowed to just steal my answer like that??"
The history of the c**....
In 1272, a Welsh inventor created the first c**... using a sheeps lower intestine.
In 1873 the English somewhat refined the idea by taking it out of the sheep first.
~ Obligatory edit. No, it took them 601 years to get the welsh out of the sheep to make the condoms.
After a car c**..., a woman comes to the hospital to see her husband...
She asks the doctor :
"How is my husband ? Is he going to be fine ?"
The doctor said :
"Well, his lower body is untouched"
Being less concerned she says :
"Oh, thank God, but what about the upper?"
He answered :
" His upper body is still on the way to the hospital "
In the 15th century the Arabs invented the c**..., using a goat's lower intestine.
In the 18th century the British somewhat refined the idea by taking the intestine out of the goat first.
I was at a f**... & asked the priest for the WiFi password
"Have some respect for the dead!" he said
I replied "Is that all lower case?"
""When I die, I'd like you to lower the coffin into the grave...
... so you can let me down one last time."
A man at a f**... Interrupts the priest and says, "Excuse me, do you have the WiFi password?"
The priest stares at him and says, "Good God man, have some decency. This is your mother's f**...!"
The man replies, "Is that all lower case?"
Two kittens are sitting at the edge of a slide. Which falls first?
The one with the lower mu
A blond walks into a mechanic's shop.
She is concerned because her car has a lot of miles and nobody wants to buy it from her. The mechanic tells her that for a price, he can roll back the odometer. After she agrees, he does just that, telling her she can now sell her car. He blond says, "why would I do that? It has lower mileage now!"
I told my boyfriend that people with lower IQs are more likely to believe in conspiracy theories...
He said Thats what they want you to think!
Is it normal if one of my t**...
Hangs lower than the other two?
USB Inventor
When the inventor of the usb dies thay will lower him slowly stop flip the Casket and put him in all the way
Doctor, I think I have a problem with my t**....
Should one of them be lower than the other three?
The Falcon Heavy is now the world's most powerful rocket
The Falcon Heavy can put around 140,000 pounds of cargo into lower Earth orbit, more than twice as much weight as any other operational rocket. This powerful vehicle could open up entirely new types of business for SpaceX: launching heavy national security satellites or even sending large modules or your mom into deep space.
In 1272, the Muslims invented the c**..., using a goat's lower intestine.
In 1873, the British refined the idea by taking the intestine out of the goat first.
A robber corners a well-dressed man in an alleyway...
Take out your wallet and give me all your money! The robber says, holding a gun to the man's chest.
You can't do this! says the well-dressed man. I'm a senator in the U.S. Congress!
The robber doesn't lower his gun and replies:
Well in that case, take out your wallet and give me all MY money!
Scientists discover a food proven to lower a woman's s**... drive by at least 95%
This discovery has been named "Wedding Cake"
An FBI statistician gave me some advice
I asked him, "I'm flying next week. Do you have any tips on how to lower my chances of being blown up by a bomb smuggled onboard by a t**...?"
He chewed that one over for a while, then answered "Yes. Smuggle a bomb onboard yourself. I've never seen a case where two separate bombs were on the same plane, so the odds of a t**... smuggling a second bomb onboard are very low."
I have a litter of Pomeranian puppies specifically nurtured to look like a French loaf, 500$ per pupper
Please don't ask me to go lower on the price, they are *pure bread*
Actual conversation today. My wife: "i'm tired of anaesthesiology. What other area of medicine should I try?"
Me: I don't know. Emerg?
Wife: Nah, I want something lower stress. Hey, what about sleep medicine?
Me: Sleep medicine?
Wife: Like, helping people with sleep disorders and such. I wonder what sort of education i'd need?
Me: Probably night school.
What is a food that, if eaten by women, could lower their s**... drive by up to 90%?
Wedding cake
I visited the doctor today and he said my sugar was too high
So I came home and moved it to a lower shelf
[Better when spoken aloud:] A young man is nervous about his wedding night.
On the day of the wedding, he asks his dad what he should do. "It's easy, son. Just kiss her on the navel and tell her you love her."
So, that night, the newlyweds remove their clothes and get on the bed. The young man leans down, gently kisses his bride on the navel and says "I love you!"
"Lower!" she says.
\[In a bass voice:\] "I love you, I love you!"
My husband kept telling me to lower my voice during s**...
I never understood his batman f**....
Just came home from my first paleontology party where we spent the night searching for the lower leg bone of a new dinosaur.
It was quite the shin dig.
I have a lower back tattoo, and in the delivery room they absolutely refused to give me an epidural...
I have a lower back tattoo, and in the delivery room they absolutely refused to give me an epidural (or any pain meds at all).
I asked if the tattoo was the reason, and the anesthesiologist said no, it's because your wife is the one giving birth, not you, sir.
At first I was mad when my doctor prescribed me medication that would lower my s**... drive, but now ..
No hard feelings.
A 100 year-old man goes to the doctor and says I need my s**... drive lowered!
The doctor replies I think it's all in your head.
The old mans exclaims That's the problem, I need it LOWER!
The worst thing about this pandemic is all the restaurants apparently using lower quality ingredients to save money.
I'll keep eating out every day, but I haven't been able to taste anything for weeks.
Someone in the f**... asks for the Wi-Fi password
"You should respect the dead"
"All together and lower case?"
Train ride
A man and a woman share sleeping compartment on a train ride.
The woman flirts with the man, and after a while, says she's cold and asks if he could please give her a blanket, as he's in the lower bunk.
The man smiles at her and asks: Hey, how about if we play we are a married couple on a train ride . Sure! , she eagerly replies.
Man: So get the blanket yourself!
It's true women do make less money than men.
But it's their fault because they choose the lower paying jobs. Men, for example, choose the higher paying jobs like doctor or lawyer. Where women choose the lower paying jobs like women doctor and women lawyer.
A man walks into a pub and asks the bar tender for the WiFi password.
The bar tender replies "You have to buy a drink first"
So the man buys a Coke.
"Ok now what's the WiFi password?"
The bar tender replies "you have to buy a drink first, all lower case, no spaces"
A man is at a barber's shop getting his f**... hair s**......
The barber gives him a piece of rubber ball to put between his teeth and inside of lower lip so he can give him a cleaner shave. While getting the shave, the customer asks, "what if I accidentally s**... the rubber ball?"
"You can return it tomorrow" answers the barber. "Like everyone else does".
As an archeologist, I organized a party with my friend to help me excavate the lower leg of a T Rex fossil...
...it's going to be quite a shin dig.
Lower my s**... drive
An old man goes to see the doctor, when the doctor enters the exam room he asks what he can do for him today.
The old man replies "I want you to lower my s**... drive"
The doctor looks at this obviously old man and says "Can you tell me how old you are?" The man replies I am 96.
The doctor says "I don't know how to tell you this, but your s**... drive is all in your head"
The old man replies "I know, I want you to lower it"
Why do communists always use lower case letters?
because they're not filthy capitalists!
The wage gap isn't real.
Men simply focus on getting the higher paying jobs like scientist, doctor, engineer. Meanwhile, women tend to go towards the lower paying jobs, like female scientist, female doctor and female engineer.
I came home today to find my wife has been on Ebay all day long.
If she's still on there tomorrow, I'm going to have to really lower the price.
I came home today to find that my wife was on Ebay all day.
If she's still on there tomorrow, I'll have to lower the price
Married
A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train.
After the initial embarrassment, they both manage to get to sleep; the woman on the top bunk, the man on the lower.
In the middle of the night the woman leans over and says, I'm sorry to bother you but I'm awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly pass me another blanket.
The man leans out and, with a glint in his eye, says, I've got a better idea... let's pretend we're married.
Why not? giggles the woman.
Good, he replies. Get your own blanket.
